A very personal blog

finally!

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here’s something i spent so many hours editing! well as usual, the header image took most of my time.
:hilo:hope it’s cool, well i find it cool! 3 columns! and best of all, deviantArt widget!!! so i won’t be making a separate blog anymore hehehe.


so… today?
is super cool! thank you Lord for this daaaaay! my crush made my day FIRST THING IN THE MORNING so my mood is all haaaappy the entire day. hahaha diba jec????!?!! he is witness to my extreme blushing when my crush waved at me from down down there while i was watching him from the third floor. WAHAHA sorry talaga mejo may kababawan talaga ako eh. i still couldn’t erase the possibility that he friggin saw his name on my doodle, it makes me nervous but LOL i couldn’t do anything about it now, do i? hehehe

i ate a lot this day. burgers, sisig and bananas overloaded with condensed milk (yuuummmy!!!), nothing my mom will be happy about if i told her (except for the bananas). anywaaaay, after lunch i decided to just hang out with chamel the entire afternoon as we wait for the play production at 6pm.

hahaha so we just sort of bonded (talked!) at school, on the grass, at the field! i love our field cos it’s so picturesque and is perfect for bonding moments! so we talked!!! there’s never a dull moment with her LOL. at the end of our conversation we both realized that he have pretty much the same idea of love and relationships. i dunno why i’m talking about it, peer pressure pare. everyone’s got one, and i don’t? shempre i care! but when i think of it, i’m not yet ready. fucking 19 loveless years, and i’m not ready?!??!! late bloomer much! that’s what you get with watching too much anime and studying in an exclusive hs. it was only in college that i was formally introduced to the friggin marsians.

thing is… the type of relationships i see around is not something i wanna engage myself into. people almost always confuse infatuation for love and i think it’s not the best way to settle down. yaaak settle down agad. i’m not experimental when it comes to this, i don’t count experiences either. while we were talking i came to a point where i questioned myself why i hate ruining friendships in favor of love when in fact, it all starts there. at dahil dyan, i’m working on it. i mean, working on changing that ideology i’ve lived for for almost 4 years. not because i think i could get a boyfriend by changing it, but because i think it’s a hindrance for God’s plan for me.

haaay Lord, i’m not asking for a boyfriend cos i when i think of it, i only want a guy friend whom i can talk to about anything. he could even be gay for all i care, as long as he’s smart and open minded… and fears You.

Lord, i just want a mature guy! hahaha amen.

hahaha