A very personal blog

mr. brightside

i went online yesterday just to relieve myself from depression. apparently, when i was already done with my blog entry, the connection became super slow and my system has gone bonkers. sad to say but i just have to leave it as it is. good thing i’ve already downloaded enough songs to refresh my mp3 player. mostly josh groban.

hmm. but i’m okay now. i need not dwell on negative things, especially that i know it’s gonna affect my whole week.

so first thing yesterday morning we had a quiz in math17. it was fairly easy but i was too careless. then as usual, i came in late in eng1. (almost) everybody does anyway. then i rushed to my chem16 class only to find out they’ve already started taking the quiz! haha. i panicked, really panicked that a.) i didn’t understand the questions b.) i didn’t answer even one question correctly and c.) i passed the wrong type of paper. hahaha.

after the horrible morning, i felt myself drained of all the optimism in my spiritual bank. i was so down the whole day that i was momentarily drawn back to my usual i’m-not-meant-to-be-here bickerings, which normally stops after realizing that i’m not the only one facing a wretched academic life despite gazillion hours of sticking my nose in a text book. whew. but like the Bible says, and like how i always remind myself, God won’t give me something i can’t handle.

yeah, it’s like saying God won’t give me a mug of hot tazo tea without a handle. but when it happens and i have no choice but to take the divine mug of tea, i am left with one option and that is to grasp the mug with my bare hands and burn my palms. but you see, eventually the tormenting heat will go away and after that i could, at last, share the afternoon in a blissful tea party with God. hahaha. weird.

during my second afternoon class, i was puzzled when i entered the classroom and found not a single soul lingering about. i panicked. i asked some people outside if someone stuck a note somewhere saying that there are no classes or that we have to transfer classrooms but found no definite answer. i was already headed downstairs when i recalled our teacher said we’re having classes at the basement. so i skipped steps to reach the basement and found out it was non-existent. the building doesn’t have a basement and i only realized that when i have already toured the whole first floor and found not one staircase that would lead me further below. haaay. good thing someone told me that i should be in the other building. so yun. -_-;;

the more i get bored, the more i do doodleworks. my current experimental style is pointilism. i’ve been doing simple shapes in my philo notebook and a couple more in my scratch papers. whenever i decide not to dwell much in studying from my lessons, i reach out for a ballpen and start drumming it erratically on a paper to err.. produce an image. haha. i only considered mastering it when sir dabalos asked us about the concept of pointilism which he compared to atoms… blah blah blah. i’m not interested. but it gave me the idea so, thank you.

come closer Friday.