A very personal blog

don't forget to breathe

oh yeah. i’m human too. i don’t know what to do with my life anymore. it’s on its way to the dumpsite. >_> aw mehn. this is so not me. i’ve become one BIG pessimist. i wonder how i’m going to fix this mess. you know what, i want to quit being like this. it’s like all i ever blogged about this semester is my failing academic life.

i want to share something happy, at least. 🙂

let’s see. i’ve checked my preliminary schedule for the second semester already. i was given 19 units, but i cancelled 3 units (History 2) to give space to Chem160 (on waitlist)… currently i’m #5 on the waitlist and i’m hoping to get a slot. thing is, I MUST PASS CHEM40 FIRST because it’s a prerequisite.

so, here’s a change of priorites. now i realized how lethargic it is to take chem40 and 32 at the same time. not only it damages my crippled braincells, it also targets my psychological upbringing. i am slowly losing grip with my sanity. because of that, i won’t push myself to the limit anymore (not that i am, in any way, really pushing myself. my efforts are quite invisible to the naked eye). i’ll do my best to pass chem40 so that i’ll take chem160 next sem, then if fate tells it so that i fail chem32, then i can just repeat it summer 2008. and look, i won’t be delayed. yehey.

oyeah. that feels better. but it’s not a good enough excuse to slack off, ONCE AGAIN.

heeeeey. i’m avoiding a group of people, and i actually feel guilty about it… because they didn’t do me any harm at all. they’re nice. yeah, but altogether they’re too overbearing, too intimidating, i look like crap beside them. i was thinking if i’m doing this for my own good, to somehow regain what was lost in my self-esteem. but i end up thinking that, if i keep on avoiding them… it means i’m actually thinking about them. and thinking about them makes me feel worse.

dude. i’m sorry. 🙂 i just think it’s not fair to pry on each of our academic standings. not that you’ve taken a step already. i actually find it nice that you’re somehow, ‘concerned’. mejo napapahiya lang ako… you know. wotcher! i won’t talk about this again. i’ll just repeat and repeat the same things. lalalalalalaaaa

heeeey! i have PE2 already!!!! at last!! and it’s swimming!!!! i can’t wait!!!! 🙂 yehey!!!!

oh, i want to hug dingdong dantes. he’s very prince charming material. when i watch marimar, i feel envious of her because she gets to hug sergio everyday. hahaha, don’t you see? sergio has big arms and chest. with him any girl will feel safe and secured. like he can just swallow you in his mighty love. hahaha. 🙂

yeah, just that. stay tuned, i might actually grow out of this misery. >_>