Life lately

✱ Reading

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue 
I’m 17% in and loving it so far. The writing is very captivating, poetic almost, and has an otherworldly charm to it. I’m excited it to know how Addie’s life unfolds with everything she’s been through in the first few chapters of the book.

✱ Watching

Jeckie and I are rewatching Naruto on Netflix and my is it such a good anime! I remember watching this when I was younger but I couldn’t remember the story (as usual). Now that I’m older, mas na-enjoy ko sya in fairness. Maybe because I’m more engaged with the story now than I was when I was a kid who was more hooked on its entertainment value.

✱ Listening 

To some Rainy Jazz playlist on Spotify 🙂

✱ Thinking

About highschool and how much I hated it hahaha.

Once in a while I get reminded of how much I hated highschool. This is one of those times. A group chat was created, I don’t know, maybe out of nostalgia, and slowly people started getting added to the room. Some went to say hi, some went to say where in the world they are (which is not the Philippines), some went to share what they do for a living, some uploaded their kid’s photos, some left immediately (respect), some went to apologize (I’m curious if it matters to those they actually bullied), and some stayed in silence just to lurk, waiting for drama lol (me). Well it didn’t come, not a week later and the group chat is already silent. Guess people really didn’t have much to say beyond ~hi hello sorry if I’ve hurt anyone before blah blah blah~, at least to the whole batch. I mean for sure we continued gossiping within our own circle of friends. I’m sure some of us are still waiting for an apology. And I’m also sure there’s no need to remember highschool. 

Wow this bitch is so angry, who hurt you? Hahaha

I never liked highschool for the most part. My best take away from that bloody phase would be knowing who my real friends are, other than that, there’s really nothing to look back to. I know who to keep as friends and who to avoid forever, and I intend to keep it that way.

I don’t even care much about reunions cos honestly, what the hell do you do there anyway? You’re just gonna end up talking to your own friends. So why bother. We already have a group chat for that haha. It’s not like we’re up for some kind of rekindling. It’s not like we’re in need of reconciliation. I didn’t think we’re a tight-knit batch anyway.

It’s not all bad though. And I know it feels unfair to pass judgment to the whole batch when it’s really just just one person, and her group of friends, who made an entire year miserable for me. I have not forgiven her, and I doubt she even remembers terrorizing me, and many others for that matter. Half the girls in my batch are mean, and to have the meanest bunch on your back for a whole year is traumatizing. Urgh. 

Anyway. I’ll forget about it. Til someone gets nostalgic again haha.  

✱ Smelling

Nothing much.

For a better office chair wow hahaha. I’m just learning to enjoy sitting properly while working and in my case it involves setting the seat height to the highest level (short people problems). And because my chair doesn’t have adjustable armrests they keep bumping on the edge of the table huhu hassle. I’m looking at this chair from ErgoHome hehe but I would need to sell my O2 Midback first to give space for this haha

✱ Wearing

Sando and shorts hehe

My time off from Twitter. I left Twitter a week ago to uhm detox cos it’s become a very toxic place to lurk in haha. Everyone is too performative and I feel like it’s a whole world filled with pseudo-intellectuals you can’t argue with. I actually just logged out and hid the app from my home screen, but thankfully I haven’t given in to the urge of launching the app every now and then, specially when I want to air out some micro thoughts once in a while. I’ve gotten better at suppressing my thoughts, specially when I know I can introspect some more and validate it further. Cos I know I’m not always right, and I’d rather have a few informed opinions than have an opinion on everything. Twitter has made it too easy to share stupid thoughts, I’m guilty of it too. So I wanna hold back. It’s a good exercise. Thinking before posting, then eventually forgetting hehe.

✱ Wanting

A sleeping mask. Can’t decide if I’ll get Tempur again or try other weighted ones. I’m curious about weighted sleep masks but I also want to be able to open my eyes fully. I think right now I just want something blackout and comfy.

✱ Needing

To stop stress twirling my hair but I just can’t? My mind is too weak for this. My scalp hurts, my arm hurts, and araw-araw para akong bagong gupit with all the bits of my hair getting cut off. Hay.

✱ Feeling

Hopeful about the things to come. We have a lot of new team members, coming from another department that’s been merged with ours. Can’t wait to get to know them, but somehow I also feel uneasy about the change lol. But whatever, I’m sure it can only be good.

Our country director has announced that they’ll be allowing people to come to the office starting September but no definite guidelines have been rolled out yet. I think the firm is hesitant to put out a rule not allowing unvaccinated people in the office because it could come off as discriminatory (well, it is) but I think it’s perfectly fair to do so, specially in these times. It’s for the good of everyone. I wouldn’t want to report to work unvaccinated. And if not everyone in the office gets vaccinated, what’s the point in risking exposure. I’m much safer at home. Hay.

Well, best case scenario for me is to be allowed remote work forever haha but that’s reaching for the stars so nevermind.