Today

It’s already Feb! Can’t wait til March to be honest. It’s when I get to have my compensation discussion with my manager. See how much salary increase I’ll be getting (if any), how much of my target bonus I reached (if any), and how much extra bonus I’ll be getting (if any). Lol. Hopefully it’s gonna be as great as last year. Great meaning meets expectations. Apparently that’s all I have to achieve here in order to feel abundant every year.

But I don’t know. With the reorg happening and my workload getting halved, I’m not sure how that’s gonna play in my performance review this year. Hoping for the best without me having to work too hard lol.

I’m really just pressed for money right now. I’ve overspent so much last year I’ve tapped into my imaginary annual incentive to pay for my credit card. I just really want to finish paying my vaccuum cleaner lol. I don’t even know how much I’ll get, I’m just assuming here.

It’s RTO day today I’m in the office waiting for 12mn lol. Our local team has started monitoring RTO’s more strictly now so I have to be in early and spend the whole 8/9 hours. Something I haven’t been doing consistently for a while now. Sorry.

Since I’m in BGC, I took the chance (again) to walk around and window shop. Right now I’m looking for training shorts that fit well. Plus sized of course. Something I could wear to play badminton. Right now I’m using my lounge shorts and it looks weird, although it’s comfy, it looks very obviously out of place. I’m looking for something like running shorts but longer and without a cycling layer. No luck finding one so far. Those that fit are either too short or have ill fitting cycling layers that I hate. Hay.

I had dinner at Nagi earlier. I shouldn’t have ordered gyoza cos the ramen was already too much, but oh well. I still finished everything (except the broth).

I hate that I’m so heavy right now. I hate the feeling. And it’s all my fault. I’m 161lbs. I was pretty okay pre-op, but post-op I lost control of my weight from resting too much and eating too much. I didn’t realize I’ve gone obese. Now everything hurts. My back, my foot, my knees. It’s just so hard to move when you’re heavy.

And it’s hard for me to lose weight because I’m so weak when it comes to food. I overeat a lot. I think mostly because I eat like my husband. I really don’t know how to restart. Every day I resolve to do so I fall into a pit of unconsious snacking. Urgh. I hate it!

I also hate that I couldn’t bring my range of motion back to normal. It’s been 8 months post-op! Part of me wants a second chance by having the scar tissue buildup removed. But I’m scared that it might swell up again and build scar tissue again because it will be too painful to move it. My ortho doesn’t seem too concerned. He doesn’t recommend it yet. We want to wait and see my progress before fully deciding on it. Oh well. My ortho rehab clarified that scar tissue buildup doesn’t completely go away, you just teach your body to move with it and soften the tissues surrounding it so it doesn’t stick so much. As for the lump, sadly it will stay.

More to my wardrobe difficulties, I couldn’t seem to find my favorite relaco shorts from Uniqlo. They’re all gone.

I have more to complain about my life but I’ll save it for another post lol.

Friday’s Happy Things

Know that this is very hard to do for me to do right now because I’ve been feeling largely uncertain about my job position. But let’s try…

✱ I got my Bodum tumbler back! When I went back for it I didn’t bother checking at Watsons because I was so sure I left it at the bathroom before I went to buy something at Watsons. Turns out I actually left it at Watsons and they kept it. I was able to recover it yesterday. Thank you Watsons! It’s honestly the last place I’d check as I was so consumed with my false memory.

Lesson learned for me here is to leave no stone unturned. Same thing happened when I lost my wedding ring one time. We were eating at Poco Deli when I realized my finger was empty. I looked everywhere but Poco Deli because I thought it was already gone before we started eating. Never did I think to find it there. Our memories are fragile and unreliable.

✱ Enjoyed celebrating my mother in law’s 60th birthday at Bataan. Bataan nga ba? Cos we kept driving to Subic to eat, even got lost there on the way home hunting down a restaurant lol. Despite staying at a crappy resort, I had loads of fun with the family and the view was utterly breathtaking. It’s really about the company.

✱ I managed to swim earlier despite feeling really sleepy and wheezy. Lap pool was full so I swam in the kidney pool which wasn’t so bad except that I don’t know its length so my swim data was probably inaccurate. Still a great 45 minute workout.

✱ I have new a Youtube review! Check it out! Finally, after a year. I guess I’m back to uploading review videos. I’ve been too lazy to work on them but I also need to free up space in my phone. So yeah, let’s do this!

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I was supposed to list down 10 things but I coudn’t so I just renamed the title to Friday’s Happy Things but honestly I could easily list 10 unhappy things cos I feel mostly sad right now. Can I just do that? It’s easier to let it out this way

1. I’m not losing weight. We’re on week 3 of dieting and the scale won’t budge despite me eating less. My husband has already lost 6kgs.
2. Like I said at the start I’m feeling uncertain about my work because I feel like my skills aren’t needed anymore. And I have nothing else to offer.
3. I’m too lazy to read
4. I’m too lazy to work
5. I’m too lazy to workout
6. I’m too lazy to learn piano
7. I’m too lazy to make art
8. And I can’t get my knee to recover fully. It’s grown scar tissue already that’s gonna be difficult to break unless I opt for another procedure.

I’m just too lazy nowadays. I just wanna do nothing. Especially in this weather.

Oh, I guess it’s a good thing that I can’t find 10 unhappy things! 😅

Today: you lose some, you gain some

Today I lost my favorite tumbler huhu. My off-white Bodum travel press that’s been with me for almost 3 years now!

I’m sure I left it somewhere in Shang when I went to rehab earlier. I already called lost and found and Rustan’s department store but they couldn’t find it or no one has surrendered it yet. I only realized it was lost when I got home and wanted to wash it.

This was its last moments with me…

One of the perks of being a vlogger is getting clues like these when I’m looking for something lol.

It feels devastating. It’s silly, I know. That tumbler isn’t the best. It leaks and I don’t use the french press lid anymore. But it’s cute and I had it pre-ordered from Europe so it costs a lot, and I love the color so much. Also, I couldn’t find it anywhere here in the Philippines.

Anyway.

That’s what I lost.

What I gained is something of similar color haha. The bucket hat I tried on the other day haha.

My husband promised me a bucket hat so I’ve been trying a few every time we go out. I tried this on the other day and thought it looks cute.

My tumbler huhu

Didn’t buy it immediately cos I wanted to get my husband’s opinon first. Of course he said it’s cute wahaha. But I wanted his opinion mainly about the price cos it’s a whopping 2.5k for a bucket hat, wth? But seriously, thank you Jeckie!

I also bought myself a new tumbler quick. I looked at the variety of tumblers from Aquaflask and settled for the smallest one in black.

The one that comes in off-white is too big for me (20oz) and my Bodum tumbler is 350ml so I got the closest one which is 14oz. It’s their smallest too. Normally I want all my tumblers to fit my hand so I can wash it properly, but I made an exception for this one cos I was in a rush to get a replacement. We’re going out of town this weekend and I need coffee in the car.

Oh well. Still gonna look for alternatives.

Embracing Body Positivity with Popilush Shapewear

 

In the world where we live, it is often surrounded by the standards or we should say beauty standards by our society. The journey of a person from loving his/her body and creating a positive impact on the society are low to none as these standards have rooted into our minds so much that it feels almost impossible to change them or look through other perspectives. One perspective is the dressing of an individual. Popilush being a famous brand in shapewears and bodycon dresses stands straight while providing the best shapewear jumpsuit & dresses to those who love to explore their bodies.

Beyond conventional shapewear

Popilush celebrates the bodies of each individual without categorizing them into societal norms due to which it stands out among others. The brand’s shapewear is designed to enhance the natural curves of the body and its features with pride and confidence. These features are visible in their best bodysuits shapewear. Popilush recognized beauty in diversity and it promotes inclusivity as well.

https://www.popilush.com/products/built-in-shapewear-deep-v-neck-lace-thong-bodysuit

Inclusivity as a guiding principle

A distinguishing feature of Popilush its commitment to inclusivity which means it embraces all shapes and sizes of women. We all are humans and we all have different needs and requirements according to our body shapes and sizes. By introducing a wide range of shapewear dresses that fit all sizes and everybody looks beautiful in their own way. This inclusivity goes beyond the marketing strategy to customer attention as it is a genuine acknowledgement for the beauty of all shapes and sizes of women.

https://www.popilush.com/products/sexy-lace-deep-v-neck-shorts-bodysuit

Empowering Every Body

It is usually said “Girls supporting girls” which means that the women are the main besties of each other and they need each other to boost their confidence. This thing can work when everyone is happy within themselves. Popilush recognizes body positivity as a powerful tool to make proud of everyone in their bodies and embrace them with confidence wherever they go whether they are wearing a shapewear midi dress or a bodycon. This empowerment is a step forward towards an authentic self that is free from societal norms and put herself first in everything.

https://www.popilush.com/products/lace-deep-v-neck-wide-leg-shapewear-slip-jumpsuit

Revolutionized comfort

Popilush is a brand that never compromises on comfort. It is the first thing every one looks at when buying a shapewear. No one wants a dress that is looking beautiful on the outside but is tearing the body apart on the inside. The subtle enhancements provided by Popilush shapewears contribute to an improved posture and the overall body image. Popilush encourages individuals to use their shapewears in their daily routine to make sure if the dress is not too short or too long or uncomfortable. This brand prioritizes quality over quantity and makes breathable, lightweight and seamless stitching dresses made specially for comfort seekers.

https://www.popilush.com/products/denim-tummy-control-bodysuit

Conclusion

Popilush has become a key player in the fashion industry by combining fashion with functionality. These dresses accentuate your waistline and make you feel so confident in whatever shaped body you are. Popilush embraces love and functionality. The brand is committed to authenticity and will keep moving towards its goals till they are achieved.

Today: #ProjectKorra, swimming, and feeling lost at work

It’s the third day of the week and as usual, nothing productive going on at work. I was gonna fix the transition item I’m gonna turn over to Jay this week, but I got really lazy like I have zero motivation to work. My skills are gonna rust big time this way and if they decide to let me go and push me out in the wilderness, I’m gonna be doomed. I don’t think I’m ever gonna find a job that pays this well and lets me be lazy at times huhu.

Anyway.

↪ Back to playing badminton!

I’m back to playing badminton after an entire year. I didn’t realize it was the anniversary of my injury when I decided to go back to the court. I told everyone I’m just gonna play easy, and I loved every single second of it.

Nothing makes me sweat the way badminton does and it’s elating to be able to sweat this hard again. It’s been a fucking year of being a potato and it sucks.

↪ Regular swims

I’m trying to do regular swims lately, specifically when my husband is at the gym. I figured I didn’t want to sleep the entire noon that he’s gone so I decided to do something productive.

I’m also learning to use my watch better to track my swims. I realized that my heart rate shouldn’t matter as much as my SWOLF score under water so I’m willing to let go of that piece of data I thought was critical to my weight loss journey.

If I pause my watch whenever I take breaks I get more accurate results. I think it was designed that way. The workout report indicates the length of pause anyway so I think it counts for something.

↪ Our litol boy turned one!

Oh how time flies! I can’t believe he’s an adult now. He’s always gonna be our baby!

Cooked something special for him – tenderloin steak! Also added bokchoy and canned Carnilove Lamb and Wild boar. And as usual, boiled squash for firm poops.

This is him on his gotcha days… he was 3 months old!

And now this bugoy is one! 🤗

Stay healthy little boy!

↪ Reliving #ProjectKorra

Korra is my ultimate #fitnessgoal. I don’t care that she’s fictional but she’s how I aspire my body to be! I didn’t lose weight on our first week of dieting, in fact I gained weight! It baffles me real bad because I’ve been cutting down on food intake and limiting my salt and sugar consumption but the scale just won’t budge!

Maybe I should add more workout and water. Oh well! We’re on week two of eating exceptionally bland meals and we’re doing fine!

Aja!

Reorg

 Company went into another reorg which basically cut my load in half but also put me in a weird place in terms of reporting structure because I’m gonna be more alone now.

It used to be Jay and I in automation. We were both hired under Software Support Team. But we don’t do support work per se. We do RPA automations FOR the support team. So we’re developers in the Support Team.

There’s an existing automation team within the Software Development Team that we kindof joined somehow. At least informally. They used to develop stuff for the support team before they decided to get their own developers, which got us hired. They invite us to their meetings and we also coordinate with them a lot because they own the infra in which our automations would be deployed. So it only makes sense to have us on board. Again, informally.

This was a weird setup because we’re all developers working on the same products but we’re kindof scattered in different teams, different leaderships in the org chart. But they were nice enough to involve us and welcome us because they knew we were in a weird place and they wanted to help as much as they can. ♥

Now to the reorg. So there are developers in the Dev Team, and also developers in the Support team. And now they split the teams by LOB, which is essentially two teams. So there are now two dev teams in Dev Team, and two dev teams in Support team.

Jay and I are broken up and placed into separate LOBs and it sucks because we’re like floating within that new pool not knowing who to join. Much worse who to swim to. Some teams were big enough they still have company, but Jay and I are alone again!

By the way I’m writing this mostly to make it make sense for me, so if you’re reading this I apologize for the rambling hehe.

I really just don’t want to be alone as a developer.

What I really want to happen though, is to join the other developers within the same LOB. Be part of their scrum team. Leverage having a BA and probably a PM. Move to Software Development while still developing for support. Just so I could do away with the burden of gathering requirements, setting timelines, and pushing back on the scope. I would love to be part of Kristen’s team cos I feel like I could benefit from it both technically… and emotionally lol.

Kristen is the one who fostered us, the lost devs of support team 藍, and I wanna join them.

Worse case is I get to work alone and work on requirements alone which sucks and quite frankly scares the shit out of me huhu. Worse case? I get redundated because they finally realize they have enough developers in the first place? Oh gosh!!! I can’t lose this job cos I just emptied my savings buying appliance and furniture !!!

Also because of this reorg, I have fewer things to do. I have to transition most of my stuff to Jay. Which will definitely affect my performance. I don’t even know what to do now. Gosh.

Help me Lord! 

Diet Day 3

Yesterday was hard for me because I got so tired from rehab and wasn’t able to eat for a while because I had to wait for Jeckie to fetch me and had to get Koomi on the way home from daycare. But as soon as we’re home I snacked up. We made sure to stock op on healthy options so we could easily reach for roasted peanuts, apples, and granola whenever we feel like it. I also had cheese, I munch on small amounts of keso de bola whenever I needed a salty boost.

For dinner we had boiled chicken breast and airfried brocolli and mushrooms. It was delicious! Magnolia chicken is delicious, it’s big and juicy and it went well with our veggies. I kept the stock for Koomi.

Basically everything we eat we can feed to Koomi which is why he’s been begging a lot these days…

Here he is under the dining table, looking at both of us at the same time 😂

Today I weighed in and was surprised to hit 160lbs. Yey for losing 1lb but also it could be water weight so I’m not too excited!

Day 3 dinner is boiled chicken and airfried carrots, baguio beans, and tomatoes.

We also had guzzler shake (frozen bananas, peanut butter, lettuce, and soymilk). I still munch on cheese and granola, but so far it’s been good.

😊