no srsly.

the pressure is building up!

ewan ko ba but everytime i do some photoshopping i always get inspired to live a life of a freelance artist or a freelance something-that-has-to-do-with-designing-or-layouting BUT knowing myself i can't be secured with just that, there's hardly any cash in there unless i'm big enough. i want to be financially secured in the future, i want a stable income (from a regular job) and a passive income (from investments). i want to be able to budget for my needs and not be out of cash. and with that, i don't think i'm brave enough to prioritize my "passion" (whatever) knowing that it's gonna cost me more that i could earn from it.

there are times, emo times, when i imagine myself running away from home and living on my own without my parents' support. the first thing i always worry about is money, i budget how much it's gonna cost me to rent a room, pay for electricity and water and feed myself. if a decent room in this kind of metro is like 3,000 then water and electricity combined is an additional 1000 (more or less) then that's already 4000 a month. plus food with a budget of 150/day... that's 4,500 a month on top of the 4000. so in order to survive a month i must be earning at least 8,500. adding contingency allowance for operational expenses like transportation and stuff, say 1,500 a month...that's already 10,000.

a minimum wage earner earns around 12,000 a month. minus tax, philhealth, sss, tithes and whatever... net income more or less drops to 10,000. assuming that i earn minimum, the cost of living alone is just enough. HAHA that computation made me slightly secured that i could make it on my own. if i could get hired in a day at a call center, and perhaps earn slightly above minimum, i could cover all my expenses and still have a bit for savings. LOL

yknow, maybe i should thesis haha

How to Openline your Smart Bro ZTE MF100

Here's a tip for all of you out there who want to get their usb broadband sticks openlined:

DO NOT.

If you could afford it, just buy a new stick! A lot of things get compromised when you get your unit openlined and here are just a few (2 actually), but very important things that may happen to your unit that you wouldn't wanna risk:

1. the autorun may get deleted
which brings about 3 consequences:

• your broadband software will not auto-install or auto-read when you plug it. in short, it will not be plug-n-play anymore.
• the memory card slot will also lose its functionality since the autorun was removed.
• your usb stick will not be read in other PCs, unless a version of the broadband software you're using is previously installed.

2. SLOWER CONNECTION SPEED WITH OTHER NETWORKS

i have not proven this yet but upon having my smart bro openlined and trying it with a sun cellular sim, connection hasn't been decent EVER SINCE. and when i say not decent, it's like you only get a good speed for 10 seconds maximum, then it drops to 0 ad infinitum... then the speed bursts for a good 10 seconds again before it plummets down to hell yet again for an infinitely painstaking time.

in short, it's useless for other networks. i know because i've tried the sun sim using sun broadband usb (not openlined) and the connection is good! take note too that i'm using the right network configuration settings for my sun sim.

there you go! don't be like me!

everytime you think of geting your MF100 openlined, DON'T. haha

and i'm freaking serious and furious and anxious to get back to my smartbro plan 999 but am friggin discouraged because the 'product support' person at SM Fairview is freaking hostile. fudge him.

k. gotta post this before the connection dies again.

trust God

have faith! >:'(

the punishment

i feel like dying of depression. ang sakit, ang sakit sa dibdib. one of the best things i've ever wanted for myself is to graduate with (the highest) honors. emphasis on "the highest". if i'm not on the top, parang err dibale na wag na lang. i won't get any bragging rights for only being 2nd or 3rd best. but oh well. tadhana nga naman. mukang hindi yata para sakin ang karangalang iyon. i'm not getting a laude. i want to cry. soooo bad. it feels like everything i've worked so hard for has been burnt to the bones. parang, teka lang. panira kasi UPLB. sobrang paniraaaa. then again, sinong sumira? k fine! ako na! grrrr napaka-stupid ko naman para i-assume na they wouldn't include my UPLB grades in my GWA (well that's what some prof told me kasi so ako naman tong si confirm!), para san nga naman ang credit evaluation diba.

maybe i need some time, space, coffee and a punching bag to get over this super emotional downturn. yung totoo, excited ako umakyat sa stage eh. sobra. kaso. hay. and alam nyo yun, sobrang ang daming nag-eexpect, pati ako ang laki ng expectations ko pero. ugh. wala eh. wala talaga eh. 

ngayon lang naman ako naging kampante eh. kasi isa na lang kelangan kong pagpaguran pero kahit na ibuhos ko pa 100% ko dito sa huling laban na to, talo na ko to begin with. i wish i had known earlier! whew. hay Lord. buti na lang bibigyan mo ko ng pera bukas.

and i'm not expecting anyone to fully understand how hard it is for me to accept this "failure". maliban na lang kung kasing ambisyosa ko kayo. hay blog. i need to learn how to be thankful for whatever i've achieved so far. i may not have reached my goal but i've left enough foot prints to prove how far i've gone.

to-do to-dohan list na sa isip ko'y di maalis

Dean's List Awarding

• food stubs
• list
• post
• seat plan
• program
• canteen
• certificates
• frames/paper
• invitation
• sir john
• technical
• laptop/projector
• national anthem
• invocation
• bg sounds

Yearbook

• post 1,500
• post dates to remember
• update letter (add faculty pics)
• letter from icon adviser
• letter for ads
• letter for messages from dept heads, dean, pres
• rex pub update

ICON

• election

THESIS

• thesis

So much to do, so little coffee!

proud daughter! >XD

here at makati shang for mommy's awarding, it's a yearly thing the whole family is always looking forward to! free hotel accommodation and best of all, complimentary buffet breakfast! that means free EAT ALL YOU CAN at HEAT! i don't even know how cool that restaurant is, but since it's inside a 5 star hotel, maybe it's some kind of a Spiral at Sofitel. lol who cares, i can't wait to eat! Hihihi

i'm so lucky that we get to experience such things! this is luxury night and i want to enjoy it but terai is down with mommy where the party is and i want to swim and eat and blaaaah but i figured, i could just enjoy the night by... watching Gossip Girl S02 or by doing thesis *chokes*

uggh, nevermind! GG time! >XD

sample profile page for the yearbook

>XD i'm kinda proud of this!

that is a sample profile page i created last night so we could show our batchmates something to look forward to for the yearbook during the grad briefing awhile ago! i'm pretty pleased with the feedback, all of them seem so supportive! i hope they'll be able to extend their support financially as well! hahaha