in fairness

my boss didn't flare at me this morning. so i was in a good mood the entire day. believe me, the moment i saw her head poking up behind her monitor at the back first thing in the morning, my whole body was filled with dread. whenever she calls me, my head screams, "what the hell have i done agaaaaiin?!?!?!" and whether or not she's calling me for good or otherwise, the feeling remains dreadful. this is so unhealthy, i'm like triggering the production of toxins in my body by harnessing bad stress! this could render me sick, anytime.

i wanna be stressed for GOOD. here's my favorite type of stress, getting frozen when my majorcrush is within 5 yards. or twelve. INCHES. WAHAHAHA that's pooooositive stress! something i don't mind getting everyday cos it's healthy. oo sabi sa radyo. but apparently, i'm majorcrushless!!! >:( and what's taking up most of my mind right now is prospecting for a future job, in case i get fired... which is very likely, with the way i've become the apple of eye lately. haysows. if this morning was good, which is weird, then for sure tomorrow will be bad.

i'm not being negative, i'm just lowering my expectations to a harmless level. preparing for the worse of things to come. being realistic. yun. wahehehe

i wanna watch He's Beautiful WAAAAAAHHH >8D >8D >8D

haynako if i wasn't such a slave for money

i'm quitting soon. :) recently, with the so many small mistakes i've done, i don't think my presence is still an asset in the library. not the right soil for me to grow, apparently. after this term i'm going job hunting! yehey! >:) eto lang talaga, allow me to be bitter for awhile. i still can't forgive my boss for threatening me about losing my job and for making parinig that she's giving my task to the new SA in hopes na "baka bumilis".

aba aba. let's see kung bibilis nga.

that's why i was in such a sour mood awhile ago, then my monthly curse kicked in so i was both pissed physically and mentally. hay. and tomorrow, tomorrrrrow is yet another dreadful day, i'm gonna be at my boss' mercy again. i just hope she'll give me back the stat job cos i'm the best person for it, seriously. i hate barcoding. well, i hate everything she makes me do. but it's the 

feelings like this should not be tolerated right? specially if you're in the workplace. if anything else, you shouldn't feel tensed everyday. and because i do, the it must mean this isn't the right job for me. actually, what made this term scary is the new SA policy which says we're going to be evaluated by our bosses, and from there decide whether they still want to keep us or not. kaya ang lakas ng loob nya na balaan akong hindi na nya ko irerenew. 

i hate her ways. but i know i've been a terrible employee too so perhaps i don't have the right to speak this way. pero seriously. this is unfair. 

the library is a mess. specially the shelves. hay. i hate to leave it that way but there's too much time involved in restoring the books in their proper order.

you always disappoint me grabe. or maybe i was expecting too much. >:|

yesterday. terai and i came to the last day of the 9th Filipino Franchise Show. adventure cos we didn't know how to get there, at world trade center, pero madali lang pala. >:) mrt to taft, lrt to gil puyat, then orange jeepney to MoA. yun na yun. it was our first time there aaaand, hmmmmm, okay lang namaaaan! everything's worth the sore feet, aching back and headache because:

1. i get to go out

2. and eat a looooot

3. with my sister

4. without spending a single cent

the perks of being bunso, or more fittingly, the perks of having a working, SINGLE, older sister. WAHAHA

after FFS we went to MoA for a while to rest. e dyusko it was the end of the 3-day sale, plus it was a sunday so the place was super duper mega packed. bwiset lang. then there were cosplayers walking around. my con yata sa SMX, the hell i care. 

maybe it's a good thing i grew out of being a major otaku. i can't imagine the shame of cosplaying. but i understand them, i WAS a fan din naman. and i can relate to them, just not in costume. yun nga lang, and don't get me wrong, i see it as a tragic human effort to look like toys. to transform into an artificial attraction. 

it's almost idolatry. aaah sige, i don't wanna sound hurtful. sarreh. i have friends who cosplay anyway. and i love them.

back to the main event, FFS sadly wasn't as good as WOFEX (Word Food Expo). DUH shempre i know they're two different events, the one is a franchise show organized specially for enterprising individuals and the other is a food expo made for, uhm, hungry people??? biased ako cos i'm accounting its value on the amount of FREE FOOD i got. HAHAHA shempre WOFEX na, busog eh. 

WOFEX next year taralets! >:D >:D >:D

a view from my window

 taken last wednesday. a solitary dead tree.

but on closer look, there's so much life in it. probably much more than the live trees around it. sadly, my phone camera isn't high-def, but the dots you see on the tree's branches are actually birds.

this scene made my afternoon so meaningful.

yesss. nagpapaka-deep! >:))

i'm scared of losing my job. scared of losing that string of independence i have against my parents. i'm not being rebellious or anything, trying to make money on my own. duh, but of course it's about time i do make money on my own. i'm on the right age. and my conscience (or was that pride?) can't take it any longer that i'm still fully, 100%, living off on my parent's income. i should be out of school, working now, but instead my parent's still have to send me to school for 2 more years. i want to pay them back, not exactly monetarily, by buying my own stuff... like a laptop. LOL i want mommy and daddy so save all their income for retirement. that's all. i don't wanna be a burden. i'm old enough. >:)

that's why, with my boss' foreboding threat about my termination, i am now scouting for possible part-time jobs outside school. i'm probably being negative, but I WANT TO LEAVE ANYWAY (defense mechanism, sorry). haha. i have a list. but. err. we'll see. Looooordddd!!!! >:((((

from UNITED STATES, SYOSSET -- who are you?

gimme a clue, dear reader. i ain't a proxy translator. >:|

no. i'm not done with the book thief yet. but i must say, the writing style is amazing! >:D

todaaaay?

- GOT MY FCLC SHIRT AT LAST! yey! my first T-Shirt design! how i wish more people would wear it. LOL sometimes i regret designing it for FCLC instead of ICON. i mean, for an artist, there's a great sense of pride in seeing a lot of people wear your design. DUH. i hope you know bad i feel about the shirt's exclusivity.

- finally on chapter 2 of WORLD OF GOO!!! haha new found game! hehe

- btw, my sister's wallet got snatched! in her bag! at goldilocks SMF! >8( her fault cos she left her bag open. anywaaaaay. it's okaaaaay. there's not much moolah in there, apparently 250 tops. plus her ID'S and ATMs. oh which reminds me, akinse na pala! but she doesn't have a credit card so, so much for a snatch really. her wallet costs even more than the kacheeeng inside. LOL maybe that's what caught their attention. langyang wallet yan. buti pa yung akeeen, KIPLING! oha. fake. >:) at least her bag didn't get snatched! COS THAT'S MY BAG! and it's braaaanded. branded ukay. >:) it's one of my favorite bags cos it feels original HAHA

- started working this morning. bossing talked to me about my renewal yesterday. her biggest complain about me was that my listening skills are kinda screwed. and that i do things she didn't order me to. LOL i dunno. can i blame JM for that? ever since he came, i've been too distracted. good ridance? aah, and i admit my hearing is a bit impaired. i understand. put i'll stick with this crap i'm in. good training ika nga. and well, it's an honor having to endure working there for 6 months now! WOW HAPPY 6 MONTHS OF WORK TO MEEEE!

- i'm officially majorcrush-less. JM has downgraded to just a crush. pengeng major crush! >8D i like K! but he doesn't talk to me. and i have an impression that he hates me! if only he knew how much i love nerds. who else, there's G too! he helped daddy carry his stuff once and i kinda see him a lot these days. aaaand, based on my preliminary stalking (oo meganon, bawal angal), he likes ANIME. now there's a common ground. BUT, he looks matapobre LOL. ok lang, i'm not poor. i'm just thrifty. hahaha

- i dunnoooo, is it best friends day today? then, happy best friends day to my best frieeeeendsss:

in chronological order!
- peachy romulo! perfect kasalo pag recess, lunch and sa kalagitnaan!
- mannie rueda! perfect kalaro sa damuhan at putikan!
- karla torres! perfect kaconcertan sa MMA tuwing uwian!
- brian buenviaje! perfect pagbuhusan ng kilig sa mga kinababaliwan!

yess. isa na kong ganap na manunula.

get well soon besp! >:)

i'm having problems with my schedule. and it's because of DIGICIRRRR. i specially enrolled in that class to give enough time for work. then we were advised to either transfer sections, have sunday classes, or agree to have another prof handle the subject.

ACTUALLY. the best option is the third one. i mean, why do you think we enrolled in that class? DUH. it's the SCHEDUUUULE. i don't care about a new prof. i don't want my work schedule compromised. grrr...

we were dismissed early, and as promised, i went to pay a visit to my bestfriend who's currently confined with a dislocated elbow. i missed him!!! >:D it's the first time i saw him in, errrr, months, tapos sa ganong kalagayan pa o. haha

sorry but that's kinda not the best part of this day yet (2nd best siguro HAHA). the best part was, RAAAAAIIINNNN!!!! whew grabeee! tita sola and karol let me watch videos during his concert here recently.  WAAAAHHH GRABEEEE PWEDENG HIMATAYEEEEN?!?!?! i don't even know his songs. but i've been crushing on him ever since full house. tapos pabalik-balik na lang kung san ko sya makita. but the feeling is still there! INTEEEEENSEEE ITOOOO!!!! bat ganto mehn?! >:) ang sarap kiligin ng bonggang bongga. >8D

raaaaaaiiiinnn ♥♥

yess, ansungit ko tlga. >:)

see, i knew it. this blog is cursed. my phone hasn't been sold yet, my odesk career is still a blur, and I'M GOING TO EK TOMORROW. try stopping that.

btw, i got my grades already! thank you Lordddd cos i'm still a scholar. i feel bad though cos i wanted to be a full scholar but I'M ALWAYS A SPOT SHORT. i'm the top partial scholar, which means, i'm one rank behind being a full scholar. but my grades actually slipped 0.03 points. thank you parin Lord. >:)

dear Lord. i'm actually quite envious of the full scholars. BUT i try to fight the feeling by being friends with them. HAHA help meeee.

ang sakit ng ulo ko deym. >:(


i felt a bit guilty about interested buyer #2563 (random number). but the thing is, he kept on asking me out. and i mean SERIOUS business, he knows that. it was a mistake giving out our landline to him, he kept on calling even though i warned him to text first before any calls. thus, i got really hostile at him. like:

IB #2563: hi
me: o
IB: ano, nabenta mo na?
me: oo
IB: so...
me: hindi mo na ko kelangan tawagan
IB: sige, salamat a
*hangs up*

see, i even had to lie just to shut him off.