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Monday, February 15, 2010

etpl

#1) lilibre mo ba ako? dami mo cash prize eh :D
oba >;P

LOL

Nothing came for me during the 5 months he was absent, that was sort of like a recovery period for me. No new crush, nothing at all, I just did my best in my subjects (which when translated into UP vocab would amount to mediocre) and luckily I was able to catch up with the regular batch. So that time, I tried joining an organization. There I met, Mr. Ideal Guy. He's the guy i've been talking about randomly in this blog... the one who wears glasses, has an undeniably high IQ, is an artist, the one who does well in his acads, and best of all... a Christian.

But then... has wasn't a majorcrush for me, he just struck me big time because all i ever wanted in a guy is in him. but oddly enough, he didn't give the sparks, he didn't make me nervous, his presence didn't stress my inner organs. he was simply... someone i'm extremely fascinated with. someone i enjoyed working with, especially when it comes to artistic stuff. his presence makes me feel light. maybe it's his freaking spirituality oozing out. haha ewan.

you know what, there's one memory of him i'll never forget...

one time i was making a business out of my artworks. i'm making custom laminated cards with people's name on it. i advertised it on multiply using a photo album entitled, 'help arianne rule the world!' where my sample artworks were displayed. when we met the next time, over the customary org handshake, he said "i will help you rule the world". those freakin words, i don't know, but they made me feel so light and happy. he'll help me rule the world? hey, i'm having my first minion for world domination! and we've sealed it with a handshake! LOL i felt like all the aliens rejoiced, there were fireworks in mars and every UFO were doing exhibitions in space.

it was the coolest and most heartwarming response i've ever had. yeah. >;P

because i thought he was weird, and i like weird people, i let him borrow my book called 'The Odd Brain', it's a little technical, but i thought it fits him hahaha, until now i haven't gotten the book from him yet, and i have no plans to... for now. i want the book back, yeah. but i dunno. hahaha

ok, as far as my stalking is concerned, he has the neatest handwriting a guy could ever have. he's a scorpio (yehey?) and we share the same province (like, one jeepney away). haha hahaha hahahahaha

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why am i writing this? onga pala it's feb! i like looking back at the days i'm so heavily heartstruck. memoriessss, yeheeeey.

by the way, i had a good good day. i didn't spend anything on pamasahe cos daddy drove me to school this morning, nilibre ako ni brian pa-FCM, and terai took care of the jeepney fare for me. then we ate at YOSHINOYA. yumyumyum. favorite resto ever! >:D

i remember when i was still in LB, everytime i go home i'll stop at sm megamall to eat dinner at yoshi! HAHAHAHAHA chicken teriyaki, miso soup, green tea, red gingerrrrr yuuuummmmmyyyy!!! >XD

okok goodnight! >:D

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Saturday, February 13, 2010

cma

it was called instant attraction. he's all too attractive for his own good. deep set eyes, thick eyebrows, red lips, a pointed nose and ashen skin. and even though that might struck him as gay looking, i can guarantee he couldn't even pass as a metrosexual.

i was way lucky to find out he's on 5 of my classes, shares the same course and batch with me, and live on the same street outside the campus. yeah, that was me doing my investigative job (aka stalking). i also found out he's a virgo, which made things more astronomically romantic. lol

anyway, it couldn't be helped that we become friends, after all, we see each other everyday. ever since then, we start walking home together. i keep my silence as usual, because i'm the type of person who gets really tense inside when my crush is within 5 yards hahaha.

my admiration for him grew when he answered one of my very hard algebra homeworks. when i asked him about it, he immediately set his pen on my notebook and gave me the right answer in less than a minute. it's the best package i could ask for, looks and brains! i also learned  he got percentile ranks of 98 and 99 on math and science respectively on the UPCAT and graduated from a science highschool. at that time he's holding 2 scholarships. i couldn't imagine how intelligent he is. and he never boasts about it. also, he's not even aware that he looks so damn good and wouldn't make an effort on it.

and so our friendship grew, though it was hard on my part to be really myself cos you know how it goes in my freaking nervous system.

he's a gentleman too, which made me fall even more. one time when we were walking, he stopped and asked me if he was walking too fast. of course i said no, but he still slowed down. honestly, if i'm with a guy, i never liked walking behind, so i always try to keep pace. sometimes he would ask if we could jog together, but i would freakin decline, i frakking don't know why. i'm too shy i guess. so whenever he jogs, he'll leave his apartment keys to me and just get it back on his way home. i remember my favorite subject during that time was PE because the class is held at the farthest building from our dorm so it's going to be a long walk home with him ♥

one time i found him recruiting members for their sorrority, i asked him if i could join too but he said not now cos it's going to be extremely physical. whether he doesn't want me to join because i could get hurt or he thinks i'm too weak for a sorority, i never knew. since then, i never considered joining one.

the feeling i get when he's around is really remarkable, cos it's the first time i fell this hard for a guy. i thought he was a lifesaver, because falling for him meant I'M NOT A LESBIAN, which i thought i was after graduating from an all-girls school and crushing over a girl two years my senior...for two freakin years. it was a total relief having to find out that i'm straight, after all.

but you know, i didn't know what happened. the last few months of that semester turned me off. he gets absent frequently and doesn't show up in exams. i tried asking him why he's not attending classes anymore and he just said, "nakakatamad na eh." he's academic standing declined, and i became his source of information of what happened at class, though he's not really doing anything about it. he simply lost the motivation to study. i never knew why.

his attitude towards school was the turning point of my feelings for him. i want to get him back on the tracks because he's too smart to quit now but i never knew how. one time when he was absent in our philo class, i looked out at the window and saw him walking with a girl with long hair, a black fitted shirt and a mini skirt. for a 16 year old girl who never knew better, it was the most hurtful day of my first semester in college. i walked home absent minded, and when i came to the dorm, i plopped myself on the sofa and just stared at the ceiling for a good hour before some kind dormmate snapped me out of it.

the semester ended, and i passed all of my subjects. i wondered about him, but only received news after a few months. i learned that he got dismissed from the university and failed to re-appeal for the next semester so he'll be out of sight for the next 5 months. i thought of contacting him to offer help, any sort, but there was no response.

the 5++ months i wasn't able to see him helped me recover. i totally lost my feelings for him and tried to focus on my studies alone. when i first saw him after a long while, i became more sociable and more open to him, the feeling of awkwardness has died down. it's what usually happens when i fall out of 'like'.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

whew! come on!

this is probably the busiest week of this academic year... for me! HAHA i thought i could enjoy the foundation week sleeping all day cos there are no classes, so i only have to tend to my library duties for the whole week. pero mali pala hahaha cos the library has a LOT of activities planned as well.

i ended up having to do something everyday which drains me physically, but nevertheless i'm enjoying it naman. so far. i mean. onga pala, i won FIRST PLACE in the poster-making contest hosted by the library. LOL i couldn't believe it cos poster making meant being a master of OIL PASTEL and that's like my least favorite medium of all. my work was the lightest actually, no heavy smudging or whatever. i couldn't smudge and blend, that's why.  in fact, i used colored pens  and black marker for the most part hahaha who cares? also, that's probably the biggest artwork i've done individually, so far. that's one whole white cartolina in 2 hours dammit. >__<; anyway, i still won so that's cool! HAHAHA yehey for the cash prize!

ok. tomorrow has to be epic. i'll be at school the entire day. yes, until the concert. cos #1) awarding of dean's listers (yey!) #2) Creative Writing Seminar at the library (emcee) #3) Musical Poetry Contest at the library (emcee)

i didn't know i could emcee (honestly), until ma'm ellaine put me (and adrian) at the AoG (ambassador of goodwill) programme. the script is the key. that was kind of a good break, actually.

i don't believe people when they say i'm talented because i seriously don't think so. media is to be blamed, i grew up believing talented people are those who could sing, act and dance. otherwise, you're called artistic... which pretty much means the same thing but you know, the word 'talented' doesn't sound right when you're referring to an artist. yeah?  i dunno, really. i'm soooo sleepy. goood night. >:D

seeing juan miguel (another freaking codename for my majorcrush) doesn't scare me a lot anymore... i think so?! haha ewan. it's kind of fading... i'm not sure... i think it's too early. lol

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

it's not okay

i though i was someone who's more optimistic than the rest, who sees the bright side of life in the shadows, and who thinks subjectively when it comes to people's personalities.

but no. this day reminded me how i am not who i thought i was. everyone deserves a fair chance at everything, an impartial judgment, and most of all, everyone deserves someone's friendship. whenever i meet people who are downright unlikeable, i try to veer off of their presence. i keep my mouth shut when they start saying annoying things. in short, i avoid being with them because i can't stand their attitude. but this is unfair, a good friend of mine indirectly showed me how my ways are wrong. how, i'm being selfish by avoiding these kind of people. how i'm being selective of my company. didn't God say, love one another? one another. it's a collective term referring to everyone we know.

the problem is, whenever we meet people who badly need to change something in their personality, instead of guiding them along the path to transformation, we leave them. we tolerate them. that's what indifferent friends do. that's what fake friends do. they're too afraid to try to change their friend, probably because of the fear of losing him in the process, or the fear of being taken the wrong way.

this day, i was heavily reminded of the fact (and i insist on it being one) that EVERYONE HAS A GOOD SIDE. it's just that sometimes, one side is bigger than the rest so we think we're facing a wall and forget about exploring the entire dimension.

that should be my mantra when i meet uncool people. everyone has a good side. everyone has a good side. everrryyyyone. yes, Lord, thank you.

i don't know what about this day exhausted me to hell, but when i came home, i came to daddy at the basement to say hello and went directly to the office bedroom. i slept for 3 hours, good thing dad woke me up or i'll be on REM stage the entire night and forget about the script i'm suppose to pass tomorrow.

good news: I WON in the poster making contest hosted by the college library (where i work, LOL). they just didn't tell me which place (1st, 2nd, or 3rd) but i couldn't care less. i care more about the cash price! :D haha will know tomorrow.

most depressing news of the day? I LOST MY BLACK PEN. it's not just a black pen, it's 'the' black pen from the set of staedtler colored felt tip pens i have! haaaaay.

anyway. right, i have a script to make. whew. :)

thank you talaga Lord, sobra!

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

whew!

#1: magkano ang binigay na paycheck ni ate yet sayo? >:))
- secret! enough for 3 days worth of labor. ;P

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will make kwento tomorrow. i'm soooo frakking tired! but i'm glad it's through! thank God it's finally overrrrr!!! whew! :P

tomorrow, poster making contest with jec! HAHA thursday... i dunno... friday, i think i'll be hosting another event. a minor one, this time. so sana. okay. hahaha

haha thank you Lord, because you helped adrian and i through the entire program! wahahaha :P