asan ka Ouraaaaan???

my golly, i lost my dvd of ouran highschool hostclub! it's the dvd of episodes 1-13 that i burned personally! they're the super high quality vids i stole *sarreh naman* from Astra!!!! kanino ko pinahiram??? i don't remember! and my code geass is still with kuya jepoy lol i want it baaaaaacck na. yeah, my black cocktail dress is still with glaize pa pla. gaaaawd, so many things to retrieve from LB! haynako.

you know what happens when you watch too much anime? your perception of reality and men, in general, becomes altered, scaled up and exaggerated. malay. asan na ba kasi ung dvd koooo?

hello, ryan is at SMF right now and i'm not going! yah, like itaga nyo sa bato.

i never finish anyth---

had lunch at yoshi with my family! i missed yoshinoya soooo much! it became my favorite resto because of their chicken teriyaki and red ginger (which turned super salty now. faaaailll). >_<; theeeeen i kinda panic bought instant baked mac and cheezy mac by lucky me cos... cos... me and my groupmates are gonna need a lot of food this tuesday. haha we're doing our freakin java project here! i'm not really expecting progress, more like a girls' day out disguised as a project making day. in fact... it's because of them that i cleaned my room and organized my dusty shelf of pending books. anyway, marty's salt and vinegar cracklings is probably the most in-demand junk food today. it's always sold out! haaay lanyard, where arth thooouuu????
yo brian, wag mo na ko ibili!

aaaand because i fixed my shelf, i came across my box full of letters from my friends! yah like a hundred++ letters since highschool! mostly palancas. grabe, nakaka de-stress! >:) reading their letters make me feel like a better person, it uplifts my spirits! ay grabe they think i'm funny? ewan ko feeling ko naman hinde? wierd lang daw minsan. k. aaaawww, and larz's letter from our senior recollection touched me the most, she says i'm mature daw, all caps... awwwww. it's the type of compliment that makes me feel fulfilled as a person. it's like, the most valuable compliment i got. :) aynako, but of course it's different sometimes! i'm childish too. like when i lose a favorite item... parang yung lanyard?! hmp >:P


something i found stuck in my super old notebook while cleaning.

poem #1:

if i could search into your eyes
i'll be lost in a pool of shadows
lurking in that valley of lies
that one truth i could not swallow

poem #2:

if i could search into your palms
the lines that crossed us together
i would sing a joyful psalm
and wish it remains forever

if i could listen to your words
i'd melt right here and there
i don't care if it sounds absurd
but you take up to the angels' lair

and here's something i found at the recycle bin before i emptied it
poem #3:

i walk
into an antiquated street
you follow
in steps so discrete
i brisk
my heart thumping of fear
you run
your presence, you want me to hear
i hide
with my wobbling senses
you stop

looks like i never finish anyth---
hahaha

thar you gow

ayan! ngayon ko lang ulit nabuksan memory card ng phone ko hahaha. kung di mo pa sinabi, bri!

poring on brian's hand >:D

henna kuno on mine >:D

rough ballpen sketch of ate theresa... months ago

the usual 'waiting' doodle. favorite activity pag may hinihintay na matagal

sorry, try lang naman. kaso panget haha

oks! java mode ulit! >:D

>:|

hello. my brain is clogged. >_<;

our teacher didn't show up this morning! so we were dismissed (indirectly, by the guard, who turned off the aircon) 2 hours early. unfortunately i have to wait for my filione groupmate till 1130 so we could do our project (the super easy project i was talking about in my previous entry). so i waited! i was supposed to go and make tambay at my cousin's house for awhile but it's sooooo hot and i lost my payong so i just stayed where i was, and doooooodled... ang loner amp! T__T;;

otapos ngayon. i'm not making progress with our java project. thing is, i don't understand anything wahaha.

help naman. i need to divide the contents of the text file i have into arrays of different data types. i have a text file with names, student numbers, and grades. yaaaah, i need a string array, int array, and a double array. easy ba? hooow?

heeeelp!

broooo

reassembling a broken piece doesn't turn it back to the way it was. it's not gonna be the same again. it may be stronger, but uglier. of course i'm talking about literal objects! wahahaha!

kay, sobrang bigat pala sa tiyan (chan? tyan? ang awkward itype) ng krushers.

moving on, if it were in real life, i would say there's a lot of truth in it. a broken friendship is worth restoring, fine, but it can never be the same again. once you put malice in it, it becomes awkward forever. and i hate being awkward cos my brain goes berserk. yeah, you know how it goes. i hard to be friends with someone whom i feel awkward with (like my crushes!!! && people who like me and NOT vice versa). point taken?

why are there mysterious bruises on my thighs? i know i'm kinda clumsy sometimes but i should know when i hit something. duh. good news, my two bruises on both shoulders are completely healed na! e kasi naman ung sabitan ng padlock sa classroom doors ang lakas maka-disgrasya.

anywaaaaay, we had sisig this afternoon so i'm super full. goooooo 2 1/2 rice! and we have this project in filione which is super easy but it's a group work so no matter how much i'm itching to do it all by myself, finish it tonight and pass it tomorrow, i can't! cos i have to discuss everything with my groupmates. and because it's hard coordinating with people, we'll be passing it next week, instead of tomorrow. you know how it sucks to be given a group project which is more efficiently done individually??? haaaay.

so yeah, i'm trying confuse you. ok, trigo is crucial now cos i don't trust every formula our teacher writes on the board. i always have to validate it with a book, then with the internet before i memorize it. thing is, he often makes typo errors! like + become - and x becomes y. you know, math is all about accuracy. it's frustrating when you're working with wrong equations.

sometimes i wish he just told it to me straight cos it's pointless being like this, being weird, and not knowing what to tell people when they ask me, "why?". i can't tell them about it too cos it would seem like i'm acting based on assumptions alone and that's weird enough. no it's not an assumption, it's second-hand information, so it's like... it's true! but you knoooow, i can't cos he doesn't know i know. haaaa???? i wish she hadn't told me about it, then i again i knew it was coming. what now? sorry ah! i don't usually encounter such things eh! noob!

right. javaaaaa. T___T; it's harder now. there's something lacking with his teaching methods haha. sinisi? eh wala lang. i get it, but i don't know when to use it. and it's like, we just got into arrays and after 1 meeting, he gave us a project bulking on it agad? sana tinuro ng mas matagal. >:( i don't get anything at all! and theeeen, he lost my last quiz. i think he lost most of our quizzes that's why he gave another quiz which is the same in scope pero wala na kong alam so faaaaail.

this is getting long! sorry! >:D

o tapos, there's this red wallet i fell in love with just awhile ago and it costs P3,000. T__T;

when there's no compensation for being ugly

sorry for being mean, but it's the only way i can be brutally honest with myself and with everyone.


i want it to die, why won't you quit talking about it? do you know how disgusting it feels to be involved in such a story? i've been rolling my eyes at this every time i hear about it. get me out of it for fuck's sake!!!

sometimes it annoys me how girls can be so sensitive at times, like every joke catches them off guard and they bitch out like crazy. but of course i'm being partial, girls have the right to be sensitive because they are generally more emotional and if guys don't understand how it works in our brains then they should all fuck off. i hate your jokes, you're not funny. what the hell is it that you told these people to get them on your side? now they're all for you and they're pushing me.

you know what, i hate to sound judgmental because i'm afraid of karma. and i also don't want to sound like a female jerk, so i'm not telling it straight on. but really, GIRLS, you should know how it feels to be in my place!

walk a mile in my shoes and feel the brewing disgust every time you hear people talking about it.

naiirita ako alam nyo ba yon? ang panget kasi! both literally and figuratively.

emf!

when i walked out of 309 i felt like all this knowledge i have, all this talent and creativity amounts to nothing at all, that all these bragging rights... i can only face to man and not to God. in reality it's not easy to keep humble when you're blessed with something you know is worth showing off. blame human nature. it's a hard task to keep your head down at all times when you know you're good at something and it needs recognition.

k, my head hurts like crazy i need to throw up. >:|