bakit nga ba ako nandito?

ang storya sa likod ng aking pagiging estudyante ng department of chemical engineering. na lubos kong isinusumpa.

sa application form:

first choice: UP diliman
course1: journalism
course2: business mgt

second choice: UP Los Banos
course1: communication arts
course2: economics

haaaaa?
bumagsak ako. technically, yes. dahil pinadalhan ako ng rejection letter ng UP kung saan nakasulat at aking UPG. 2.25 ata and passing sa diliman, 2.50 naman sa Los Banos. 2.6 ang nakuha ko.

minarapat ng mga magulang ko na magpawaitlist na lamang sa los banos ngunit kailangang magpalit ng preferred course dahil kung ipipilit ko ang commarts at econ, 2.6 ang grade na ililista nila. mababa, kahiya-hiya at malamang lamang walang papansin sa akin.

ngunit nakita ni mommy na pag kumuha ako ng engineering na course, tataas ang UPG na icoconsider nila, ang 2.6 ko ay magiging 1.5!

ganito kasi yan...
ang UPCAT ay nahahati sa apat na parte: Math, Science, English at Language. may kanya kanyang scores ka na nakuha sa bawat subject at yun ang tinitingnan kung pasok ka ba sa course mo.

FOR EXAMPLE:
assuming na over 100 lahat ng subjects

at eto ang percentile rank mo (actually, akin to):
Math: 90
Science: 91
English: 78
Language: 42

note: ganito ang ibig sabihin ng percentile rank, for example sa math - 90 ang nakasulat, ibig sabihin nasa top 10% ka (100-90) ng mga kumuha ng exam, sa math lang yan. ngayon sa science (see scores above), nasa top 9% ka naman, sa english at language nasa top 22% at 58% ka naman. or more appropriately dahil mababa ang language mo, nasa bottom 42% ka.

hindi ibig sabihin nun ay 90/100 ang nakuha mo sa math!
gets?

dahil dyan, tuloy tayo...

bawat kurso ay may required percentile rankings na kailangang masatisfy ng estudyante bago sya lehitimong makapagaral ng kursong iyon.

for example, para makapasok na ng commarts eto ang minimum standing na dapat nakuha mo sa UPCAT

math: --
science: --
language: 75
reading: 80

example lang yan ha! you see, blanko ang math and science, ibig sabihin... wala silang pakialam kung bobo ka sa math and science ang mahalaga magaling ka sa language at reading. ganun talaga ang mga kurso, hindi lahat icoconsider.
kung dyan ako nagpumilit na pumasok, bagsak agad ako... ang 80 na kailangan sa reading ay hindi ko naabot (dahil 42 lang ang nakuha ko)... haaay. T___T;

ngayon tingnan natin ang chemical engineering:

math: 85
science: 85
language: --
reading: --

kitang kita rin na wala silang pakialam kung bobo ka sa english ang mahalaga ok ka sa math and science. see the logic? mas ok kung dito ako papasok dahil na meet ko ang minimum requirement ng kursong ito. mas mapapadali ang pagpasok ko. mas mapapataas ang ranking ko.

given those, nagpawaitlist nga ako sa chem.eng'g

dumaan ako sa usual process of admission... nagpasa ng kung ano anong mga papeles, nagpa-notaryo at ininterview ng dean.

result: hindi nakaabot.
top 10 lang ang nakapasok.
#12 ako.

masaklap.mapait.napakasakit.
ang pangarap kong makaabot ng kolehiyo ay unti-unting nagalaho.

but wait there's more, rather... there's still 2nd sem. swerte na rin ako dahil tumatanggap sila ng applicants for 2nd sem, unlike diliman. hehehe

so ganun ulit, nagpawaitlist at ininterview ni dean for the 2nd time. nanlalata na ako. pagod na ko e.

june noong lumabas ang resulta ng admitted waitlist applicants for the first sem. october naman ang oras ng pagpasa ng request for waitlist for 2nd sem.

so anong ginawa ko ng mga panahong iyon?
ayon, nasa bahay... naglalaba. hay, bum ako noon.

tapos yun nga... to make the long story short, sa awa ni God, natanggap na ko. #2 ata ako nun. at 6 lang kami na nakapasok. feeling ko rin nga 6 din lang kaming nagapply for 2nd sem eh. naawa na lang siguro sila... or baka naman pinili na lang nila kami alphabetically kasi surprisingly, A,A,B,C,D,E ang surnames namin.

diba ang pathetic? pinilit ko lang talaga makapasok sa UP. feeling ko pa, i'm not worth it.

na shock pa ako. ang taas taas ng tingin nila sa mga chem.eng. pag nababanggit na chem.eng ka, laging 'whoa' ang reply nila.

mind you, hindi ako natutuwa. nalulungkot pa ko sa sarili ko dahil wala akong kilalang chem.eng. na hindi magaling. ako lang ang katangi tanging chem.eng. na panakol ang grades. huhuhuhuhuhu

haaaynaku. it's not even an excuse na commarts talaga ang gusto ko. either course, feeling ko magpapabaya rin ako.

whatever. hahaha ang haba naman nito

whiskywhisk

i've been whisking a cup of egg white with a fork for quite a while now. >__> i'm trying to get to that creamy goodness... manually. T___T; huhuhu, my arms hurt. i'm making an experimental coffee mousse by the way. bwahahahaha, and because we don't have high-tech baking tools (like an electric whisking machine)... hafta stick with a fork, and a generous amount of man power. whew! anyway, i think i'm near that creamy goodness because my once slimy transparent eggwhite is now a thick white foam.

whooooooosh! whiskywhiskywhiskywhisk!

i almost cried?

lol. i almost cried with my own fic. bwahahahaha

read it here
but before that here, i'll give a short forewarn:

- crappy grammar: sorry naman ha? i'm not good in english, my beta-reader hasn't mailed me the proofread version yet (it's been years! i think she forgot it already). you're free to criticize, curse me for bastardizing the english language and neglecting the sacred law of grammar.

yun lang. :)

WANTED: BETA READER!!!

whew. i love traggic endings! suuuuupppper! as in gusto ko yung mga storyang makapagpapa-igting ng aking emosyon. gustong gusto ko ng mga nakakaiyak na konklusyon. ayos yun. gusto ko ng may namamatay na bida. T____T; bwahahahahaha

it should be a happy birthday for my friend!

if antonio trillanes weren't good-looking enough, i wouldn've cursed him to the pits of hell but hahahaha i like him! not because i agree that he should seize a hotel just to deliver his grievances to the government but because he's good-looking (for me). bwahahaha

still, i hate what he just did yesterday. did you know how much time it took us to travel from UP Los Banos to Home? 6 FREAKIN HOURS, MAN. my sister and i boarded the bus at 5, and 2 hours later, we're still in Laguna. fuck the traffic. we've finished our mega sized tortillos and have dreamt a lot already and we're still in laguuunnnaaaaaa. miles away from the expressway. and when we got there, our patience was tested still. traffic nanaman! plus! it took us another hour to reach the PNP Checkpoint and when we got there, we were like "WHAAAT?!??!? NASA CHECKPOINT PALANG TAYO???????" it clearly is a bad idea to travel that night.

we arrived at megamall at around 930 and when we went out the bus we were like, "Praise God! Steaming Chicken Teriyaki and Miso Soup + unli Rice, HERE WE COME!!!!"

but lo and behold! we've begged the guards enough to let us in but noooooooooo! they won't allow anyone to enter the mall anymore! and what is to be blamed???

THE 12MN CURFEW!!!!
then of course, it all boils to down to Trillanes ♥

so we have no choice but to go home without eating. i'm starving, my head hurts, and my sister is throwing tantrums already because she's hungry too. she's one hell of a monster when her stomach isn't full. >____>

eventully, our parents fetched us off at fairview caltex, we bought food on the way and thank God, we're home! finally!

---------

♥ HAPPY BIRTHDAY NEZ!!!!!!! ♥

high priority

kailangan MAGPAPAYAT!

hephep!

what i have to say about our chem40 lab instructor:

hell, he has a lot of expectations!!! well, what great performance could you possible get from a class mainly consisting of first takers (excluding me, of course!). i got that from experience, now don't argue. being a 2nd taker clearly has its benefits.

what else? i think, i'll be learning more from him than i did with my previous instructor. i like the way he makes sure everything is explained, as well as how he provokes our minds to do simple mechanical logic on the way the instruments to be used are designed. take note too: he makes SUPER LONG prelab discussions it takes a lot of our hands-on experiment time. plus! he doesn't dismiss us immediately, he wants to make sure he has told us every piece of information we should harness ourselves with.... include unsolicited advice here. but that's ok, he's fun. i can tell. :)

however, he can get too harsh on us. by that, i mean he isn't gentle when pointing out that what we're doing is wrong and downright unforgivable. when we were shaking the freakin separatory funnel with the dicloromethane and liquid organic extract, he was like "hindi ganyan!!"

like crazy, man. he startled us big time.

anyhow, through his emails i can see that he is quite a gamer. his username speaks of an RPG character and his notes are funny, in a semi-unforgivable way. and he puts opening and ending remarks like

to my adorable students,

(insert degrading-slash-funny-and-enlightening remarks here)

yeah!

- sensei alvin

hahahahaha
i'm looking forward to learn more from him. more so, i don't want him to learn i'm a second taker, because swear, i don't want him expecting a lot from me or from anyone else for that matter.

and ultimately,
i want to pass chem40 this time.

not productive

i haven't studied yet. i have two quizzes tomorrow both of them having very long handouts. ha, that's the least of my problem... >___>;;

i already went online awhile because our history teacher didn't show up, during that time i already made a very long post about my utterly biased opinion on the issue of traditional vs. digital art (i'm for trad) but decided to just leave is at a draft for the meantime. i mean, i've been babbling about the same concern ever since! and until now i can't seem to get enough points to back myself with the argument that being an artist lost it's exclusivity and sacredness ever since the emergence of tons of digital art programs/softwares became mainstream and photoshop became the producer of virtual canvasses. >____>;

ok, let's leave that.

i was thinking of switching to LJ. i'm very concerned about my err 'private life'... also, i don't want a lot of people (especially those i know) reading my blog entries. not that there's much, i actually perefer strangers than friends when it comes to developing good readership. point is, i hardly want anyone to sympathize with me. sometimes i always end up overly conscious with what i've written, specially that this blog is always linked to my other pages... >___>;; waaaah.

LJ or Blogger???? wooot.

more so...
i don't feel like performing in jami's debut anymore. simply because i don't want to look epal. besides, i still haven't prepared for it. she said the motif is red. well, i don't have a red dress! i haven't even bought her a gift!!! mehn, i have a lot of buy this weekend.

haaay, ok. i'll study now. :|