giant optics

can't think of a good enough title. sorry. the past few err... moments were really dreadful i couldn't almost get out from the thick blanket i hid myself in. i have never been this depressed in my studies. i'm not usually like this in highschool. i never cared. i was too indifferent to bother looking at my grades because i know there'll always be some compensation if i don't get my writtens high. well, things have always been different when you enter college. everything goes extra hard and painful to bear. college will make you feel like the most stupid person on earth. but honestly speaking, i'm still more happy than sad even though things are like this. the endorphins need an appraisal. yay.

psychology is my new favorite subject! yehey. simply because it's the only class where i laugh the most. the discussions were always humorous and well, there's... :)

L word. i'm watching it right now. and don't give me that look because even though i think it's quite illegal to watch it here, they're not so strict about it. damn shane. >;\

oh... i got to get viewing now. ;)

live junk

hello. our chem16 teacher didn't show up, that's why i'm up here early doing my usual online activities. hay. i've just realized how i've grown into such a hopeless romantic. i'm actually close to ending the argument that all cute guys are either a) taken or b) gay. there's never really a reason for such guys to remain single unless their minds are occupied with the woman or (ehem) man of their dreams. either way, they're all taken. there are no more cute guys for ugly twerps like me. and i won't settle for someone ugly either. not that my standards are high, but i'm not usually attracted to ugly men. i'm being a selective ugly bitch here.

nonetheless, i believe that someday all the romantic goodness i am being deprived of right now will turn into good karma. i'm not rushing into having a relationship, in fact it never crossed my mind. i just want to feel the feeling of having someone so crazy in love with you that he even went out of the borders of sanity by having your name henna-ed on his arm. take note- in big bold caligraphized letters that almost occupied half of his arm. i found that action really sweet it made me jealous. of all the names, why does it have to be mine when it's not really for me? >.< anyway, even though he looks quite like justin of full house, the fact that he's taken already turned me off. i have no regards to men who are firsthand taken. hehehe.

this is just your very usual stupid teen love-life ramblings that in whatever angle you peep through will always sound shallow and conceited. i'm just making most of my teen life.

i want flowers too. =<

new layout

pretty much only the color scheme has changed. red is still my favorite color. i just want to see something new. hope it works well in your browsers, though i wouldn't count that much with firefox and other browsers.

we had our field trip in tagaytay... awhile ago. we left here (in los banos) at 730am and we came back at around 830pm. it was fun. really fun. psy1 is now my new favorite subject! cheers to that. haay. the field trip made me momentarily forget that i have two exams on tuesday, a math and a chem lab. i'm still looking for reasons to continue living you know. arrgghh. i'm feeling nervous for my chem standing. grrr... i feel so stupid.

vegetarian food is great. in fact we had vegetarian adobo for breakfast and i swear, you wouldn't even suspect that the 'beef' is not beef at all. =)

it's just now that i noticed a certain classmate. i never really knew we were classmates until i saw an 'arianne' henna-ed on his arm. of course it's not me, when i first saw it i was like "ha?" so okay. it must be his girlfriend. hehe.

but come on, who wouldn't want her name tattoo-ed (or henna-ed on a lighter note) on her man's arm? NOT ME. hahaha.

weeee... gotta study!

where do i begin...

i'm home! you'll probably read that statement once a week whenever i chance upon an internet connection here in our house. i'm so glad i'm back. it's a very long weekend for us! i couldn't be anymore happier. the bus ride was extremely nauseating and i was suppressing the urge not to throw up. it was hell. i'm not a fan of bus rides (unless we're on a field trip).

i forgot to greet you all a HAPPY VALENTINES!!!!
and also... BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO K.A.!!!!! WE LOVE YOU!!!

now back to my ever shallow entry...
good news. i got a perfect score on our PE1 long test. bad news. who would be proud of that? i'm not. PE's not counted in our curiculum, it's mainly for compliance sake. and it's not even going to raise my general weighted average. grr... but on the bright side, it's nice seeing your name on the top notchers list. hell yeah.

i still suck in chem. and i know there's a way for me to turn the tables, only i'm too fickle minded to know how.

so my throat is killing me and it's my own stupid fault why i'm banned on sweets this hearty-heart season. look, my throat is sore and i have this feeling that it's also scratched. whenever i yawn my throat goes to a painful stretch and i couldn't bear it. it's like an open wound being stretched. ouch mehn. good thing my fever's gone and i only have to deal with this stupid sore throat and a more stupid colds.

speaking of colds, a majority of people in our campus is sick as well. if not a mild fever, they're all wheezing their noses out. i also found out it's because of the drastic change of weather. first thing in the morning you'd be freezing like hell and then next thing you know you're being grilled by the scorching heat. and thus, since we're very fragile human beings, we get sick.

aah whatever. so what's up with my valentines? mehn it was damn BLANK. i'm not expecting anything anyway. i just feel jealous of all the people whom i pass by carrying bouquets of flowers and heart-shaped balloons. hahaha.

hmm. i made another LJ account. just so i could read mika's entries and read my other friend's entries as well. http://livejunk.livejournal.com

♥

everybody's well aware that today marks the most anticipated event for this month. it's valentines day! by now you should be thinking what a bore i am that on this festive day i chose to go online rahter than pay a hundred bucks on speed dating and another 20 bucks to have my crush's picture taken by a paparazzi (they're just two of the fun things you could spend your money on this valentines and yes they're available in our campus, for now) but that's life. i mean, this is my life. i have no valentines. awww. well, this is just one of the many curses i have to bear with for being an incredulous muse of nonsense. hehehehe.

hmmm. i'm in love with the teleserye Sana Maulit Muli! in fact i'm watching it right now through youtube! yehey. ♥

ehem. i'm not bitter! hahahaha

dormythology

i'm sick. i have tonsilitis, yun lang naman sakit ko e, so much for valentines. grrr... ate theresa texted me 12:01 am she said the ryan and juday are so sweet in the lovapalooza last night. i'm so down. really really down. and chances are ryan won't be taping with y!speak anymore so i have to bear dj mo twister and his weirdly frank antics. bianca g. would be good enough consolation for ryan's absence. how i wish.

it's 5:30, i'm still at home. we should be in the bus terminal now but turns out i just woke up like.. now. i'm not yet finished studying for our philo exam and i haven't flipped even a single page of my chemistry book for tomorrow's test. so many things to do and i feel really week. damn. oh i know why. i ate a lot of sweets last week. i remember i ate 4 bars of chocolate, 3 slices of cake and drank a lot of coffee so... heh no wonder.

on the bright side of it all, i'll be going home this wednesday because we don't have classes on thursday and friday due to the 'palarong uplb'. yehey. and on saturday night i'll be going back to elbi again for our psy1 fieldtrip. >.< sad.

crush ko na si john lloyd! (but not like ryan. wahehehe) his super giant billboard in SM north is just... swoon-worthy. he's so cute. if helen is the face who launched a thousand ships then john lloyd has the smile that melted a thousand girls and *_____ is the guy who provoked a dorm war* of course you can't relate! hehe. we've been planning war tactics during kim's birthday and i was hailed as virus girl/trojan queen because of the virus incident on primelink solutions. my other dormates have been promoted from being syokoys as well. hahaha. we have dyusa, bangs curtis, reyna bidog, 2nd princess, goldilocks, rouge, sleeping beauty, thumbellina, jj the explorer, belle, psuedo dyusa... blah blah blah. yeah, it was fun. and we're all going to war against ___ just because reyna bidog saw his one-and-only with a rather pretty girl from the other dorm. LoL.

you know it's all a joke.

i'm trying to make sense here

we're all confused! everybody goes through this stage of confusion of whether or not they are really suited for the course they're in. i have only one advice, we've only just begun. we're only freshmen students! we're rushing things up! we're still subject to further adjustments and it will continue to annoy us. look at the upperclassmen, try to interview them, you'll realize they're just like us when they started... they're all excited on the first day but come one or two semesters, they go cursing their courses like hell. but they all surived, yeah they did, they went through it one way or another... and look at how they spend their junior years. they seem so laid back and fully-adjusted. someday we'll be like them. we'll get used to the pressure that's deforming our morale. we'll bloom! yehey.

i'm not saying i won't shift. i'm still thinking about it. i've taken a generous amount of online quizzes and all of them gave suggested i venture into the world of art. but upon checking myself, although i would rather draw graphics than plot coordinates, i cannot carry my passion for drawing to a higher level. it's only a hobby and i don't want to pursue it because if i do, my style will be limited to what my professors teach me, i will be pressured to do a plate i'm not interested in and... i don't think i'd earn much. -_-;; whew. besides, i'm starting to like chem. yes i do but it doesn't mean it'll like me back. i'm learning a lot of things. things i never considered my mind is capable of grasping. it's a whole new world for me. and even though i'm failing, it's a flattery to know that i can master (in a couple of years time) a field i'm foreign to.