whew...o.-

i just came from the tennis clinic... woew.. as usual... tired. i still don't know what to do with my jealousy... ang sama ko noh... cge cge... i won't be... from now on.. good girl na ko. haha...

yesterday was also tiring... i went to mama beth's store to help kasi she doesn't have any helper na eh... i thought managing a sari sari store is easy pero hindi pala.. her store kasi is a carinderia-slash-sarisaristore-slash-bakery.... o diba ang saya?

haha... kasama ko cousin ko... wahehehe... eto ang pinaka ayokong itinda...
cigarettes.

baket? kasi iba iba ung presyo.. nkkwindang and i have to use the calculator pa.. kainis...
pero i learned kung pano magbukas ng kaha ng sigarilyo.. haha.. saya..
....
i quoted this from my idol.. valentina...
"i can always pull it off, because... i'm valentina"

LoL... i'm using that line frequently na nga eh.. haha...

sowing the seeds of hypocrisy...

everyone hates hypocrites ayt? now it's time for you to hate me... or maybe not since you're not my main target on this little facade i'm starting.

remember my last post? i can't believe it will rattle my brain until now... ugghh... the luxuries thingy i brought about by my last post is put into reality... once again...shoot...

and it's the perfect time to start creating a mask whose smile never will wear off.
our FAMILY, well count the agents in even though they're not part of the legitimacy i'm pointing out, will be going on a overnight outing this sunday in mt. makiling... and yeah... i mentioned na agents na... i don't want them there... honestly. but since i don't want to disappoint my parents... i reserved a mask for myself... made out of pure hatred covered with the most hypocrite smile... imported from paris. the one that really resembles a happy and giddy arianne...

now please be discreet with this coz you're the only one who knows how good a hypocrite i am.

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from this... i realised how plastic people work their way through the mask factory in paris. they surely don't like what they're doing... but because of their FEAR of exuding what they have inside, they have to wear a very expensive mask that no one could pay on the spot... there is an installment fee and a colateral which includes their FRIENDS or family or a special someone... and in the end... no one has ever fully-paid the mask because during their facade, the mask-no matter how strong- broke into pieces and revealed the true wearer therefore losing the colaterals the person put in the risk box.

do you get me? alam kong malabo... ganito kasi ang aking weird explantion... in paris, a lot of masks are produced... one of the best makers pa nga eh.. (haha... check my facts.. they're so unreliable) and the mask you use in your facade is from paris, that is for example.
ganito na lang para simple...

the mask- represents your whole being as a hypocrite.
the 'you can't pay on the spot' and 'colateral' thing - kasi naman if you fully paid the mask it means it won't break and shatter into pieces plus you'll wear it forever.. making you a hypocrite forever.. yehey and the colateral is or are the people involved in your plan... it could be your close friend na magbabago ang tingin sayo after seeing you as a farmer in a field of hypo-seeds.. hahaa

o cge na nga.. di ka naman super engot para di magets yun diba?
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pero on the other hand.. there is still hope for me.. my plane hasn't landed in paris yet to pick up the mask eh... maybe my outlook will change once i get there.... and since i'm very selfish i think i'd forget everything else while im in the pool... di ko na lang cla proproblemahin... they don't even know they're giving problems... blah...

haha..-_-:;

i feel wierd...

i'm jealous again...-_-;;

this is the first time i felt this kind of feeling... because duh.. this is the first time i encountered this situation...-_-;;

maybe i'm close to being a rebel child... beat the crap outta me and i'll kill myself... remember my stupid attempt to actually end my life? damn.. that's the most stupid thing that ever came to my mind... to actually doze myself to death with a hairclip...

stupid stupid.

who am i jealous with? it's not just a who... it's a group of people my father is managing... since he is now a unit manager... i suppose most of his income goes to 1) paying ammortizations, taxes, and other debts 2)our tuition fees and 3) his agents' luxuries!

every week we are feeding more than ten people in the house... and that's the only day we're cooking food better than our usual daing for breakfast, sabaw for lunch and nothing for dinner...
although i enjoy the good food we serve when they're here... it seems like it's the only occasion where we get to prepare something better!

every outing, overnights and stuff... they're always there! i can't spend a single outing just with my family!
our car gets loaded not with our baggages but with them!
they fill our house every week and still i don't think they're getting the right motivation to work harder! earn more! and give back what we really deserve...

blah... i don't hate them...
i just don't like the idea of spending every luxurious event for them not for us... it's like WE are supposed to please them when what real life demands is the vice versa of it...

see my point... by now you might think i'm the afflicted one but no... this jealousy is just out of place... i'm just ranting my blahs out...

happy birthday hannah!

it's my bestfriend's birthday today... let's sing... hapy birthday to youuu!!!
Lalalalalallaaaaaaaaaa

yehey!

my dad bought me a new guitar...
hehehahahahhohohohohuhuhuhuhaaa
ahahahaaaayy... wala lang... just happy... we should have bought it for 2,800 kaso daddy bought a tuner and a cable wire pa eh so now it costs 4,6... -_-;;

hehe... ayus na rin...=)

what i like in guys (survey!)

gawain ng bored... got this thru friendster..

what i like in guys
1. Suplado: no
2. Mr. Shades: it's alright as long as it's needed..
3. Bad boy: nah
4. Masculado: no... tama lang... parang sebastian in cruel intentions 1! hihi
5. Guys who give flowers: sure... basta red roses
6. Smiling face: sure! pero nice teeth ha?
7. Hiphop: not really...
8. Guys who ask permission b4 courting: i like that... para hindi pakiramdaman
9. Has earing/s: wag na.. mag-away pa kami eh...haha
10. Used to chew bubblegum: sure basta hindi habit.. haha
11. Long-hair: no
12. Bald: no
13. Antipatiko: get out...
14. Torpe: not really... basta he's working on it..
15. Computer-games adik: no thanks... lalo kaming mag-aaway
16. Basketball player: sure pero not for a living ah...
17. Mr. Count-my-ex's-till-you-drop: yak
18. Mestizo: pwede. ok rin moreno basta di negro... negra na ko eh.. ahaha
19. Guys who sing well: sure!
20. Quiet/tame: uhmm... no... basta nasa lugar
21. Cumlaude: gusto ko suma! haha... sure
22. Formal: nope.. 50-50 etiket ko eh... haha
23. Friendly: malamang
24. Mr. I have an opinion about anything & everything: wag na lang...bka idemanda ko yan
25. Motorcyle guy: bike na lang ok?
26. Rocker: no... bsta marunong mag play ng instrument... guitar
27. Skate boarder: wag na sagot ko pa pang ospital mo
28. Alaskador (prankster): ok lang... wag lang magpapaiyak
29. Flirt: sino bang may gusto nito? shoo
30. Mr. Campus Crush: pwede...
31. bigotilyo: noo
32. Painter: sure! basta not for a living ah...
33. Galante: obcors
34. Mr. Love Letter: ayos!
35. Maporma: ayaw... simple na casual lang..
36. Talks Too Much: no
37. Soccer Hottie: aba.. tara!
38. Anti-Christ: go to hell
39. Mama's Boy: mahiya ka nga...
40. Hangs Out With His Friends A Lot: not really..
41. Mysterious Guy: cge
42. Cute Idiot: ayoko sa mga tanga eh
43. Guitarist: obcors
44. Wide Vocabulary Guy: oo! this is a must.
45. Loves you: er... duh?

it's 1:49 pm

nothin much happened this morning... as usual.. church....
the band there's getting heavier! i mean... we're like having a 45 minute concert!
it was really fun... the interludes and solos... LoL... it's a 12-man band.. everone's a professional expecially mr. idol..the great pianist for me! haha... the 'greatest' slot is still vacant...
there were three trumpets and three saxophones... woah... haha... stig i love the electric guitar.. galing galing.. clap clap... ang saya.. nakakiyak! haha...
LoL.. whenever we sing 'above all' i can't help but recall 'the passion of the christ'...
crucified, laid behind the stone... you lived and died rejected and alone... like a rose trampled on the ground... you took the fall and thought of me... above all...

seriously, i'd rather have the whole 2 hours doing praise and worship songs... hanep.
kaya nga i love my home church... every sunday i'm attending morning concerts in a real auditorium! wahehehe...
join?

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how ironic, whenever i wanted to update my blog during eventful times, i always forget and the next time i sit here i couldn't remember anything memorabe for the past few moments... but still i get the hang of blogging and prolong my posts with random thoughts... ahhahahaaa...

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this day i'm so happy... bakeet? kasi nakapa ko ung theme song ng DARNA! haha... so happy.. the part of 'hawakan mong aking mga kamay...' tapos ung strings blah... i'm so happy talaga... favorite ko nanaman c darna... when i was a kid i used to like her kasi we have a lot of darna comics kaso nawala na ... tapos i got more interested in animes kaya nakalimutan ko na sha...pero now that she's back.. masaya na ko!
ok lang nman c angel locsin pero i get to appreciate Valentina more kasi idol ko c alessandra de rossi... haha walang aangal!!!!
pero i don't like her acting dun... hehe....

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HATE LIST UPDATE!
ok.. so diba... i hate sandarafuckingidiottangaengotgaga parkputanginanyapanget... now i hate sarahpucha geronimograsa... haha don't blame me... pagpilitan banaman ang sarili sa reload? what's more? partner pa ni hero.... eeeewww? matatanggap ko pa c erich eh.. pero yun? yuck epal... wala na shang ibang ggwin kundi magpakyut! eeeeewwww.... ano bayan hero! mas matatanggap ko pa na bakla ka sa reload imbis na ung partner mo kung hindi tanga , pakyut naman! haynakkkkooooo