The Sunday Currently (vol. 12)

I'm wearing glasses soon! I was advised during our annual physical exam that I should get corrective lenses. I usually nail reading the eye chart up to line 8, mainly because I could already see the sequence beforehand and therefore memorize it. But this time I got caught when asked to read it backwards! HAHAHA Nastress ako! Tipong, shocks shocks DEFPOTEC spelled backwards is C...E..T..something right?! E BAT DI KO NA LANG KASI BASAHIN?!... why the heck am I being competitive with a freaking eye test?! 

And that, my friends, is how I was prescribed to wear glasses.

Aaaaah Levi! <3 I tried okay!

Currently

Reading
No progress with The Graveyard Book because I was busy reading Levi fanfics.

Writing
This?

Listening
The fan

Thinking
About the things I have to accomplish tonight: a logo request, and a header makeover for this blog. I want to do something I drew, and also put another navigation bar at the top to segregate the category links from the other links (Home, About, Contact, etc.). Still playing stuff out from other layouts. I think I have the general idea of what to do, but implementation is a bummer.

Also, I've been thinking if I'm being too hard on myself for not being impressive enough at work. I'm always so slow. To be honest, I'm not capable of impressing anyone with my, uhm, work skills LOL. I've never impressed anyone at work. I always end up mediocre. And it sucks cos I have a habit of comparing myself to my peers. Did you know I accidentally read an email about my officemate being regarded so highly by our clients that apart from my respect for him growing double, I also felt burdened that I have to at least be at par.

But it's all a matter of perspective ika nga, that email confirmed that indeed, there's a genius in our team, and also someone I can bother with my work (ie. get knowledge from). I'm always too shy to ask for help. You know when you're faced with a problem and you want to solve if yourself first before asking someone? Then you start digging and eventually get frustrated and stuck. Then you resort to asking people for help. Then you get scared cos you've been looking into that problem for too long already and they might think, why did you only ask about this now?!

My question is, how long should you usually try to get things done by yourself before asking for help?

Smelling
nada

Wishing
For more focus. I get easily distracted. You can't get me to work one thing for an hour without pausing at least 5 times doing irrelevant stuff.

Wearing
sando and shorts

Loving
The fact that I got to sleep for 16 hours yesterday! And I even dreamt twice!

#1: I was being interviewed for a US Visa (talk about how dreams confirm a nagging desire) by 3 people: my non-favorite blogger, a vocalist of an indie band, and one of my teammates. It was a series of interviews and I got an impression that I passed, though who knows.

#2: I was congratulating my sister on her 1st year anniversary of working at UCPB saying, you can finally resign! yahoo!

Also, Levi! hihi <3

dejavu

i had a dream

i was running late for some marathon that i think was sponsored by nike when i got a fit of rashes on my arms, much like what i had thursday last week (in real life*). i rushed back to the house to get some antihistamine, careful not to bump into my mom for fear that she'll notice my horrible rashes and stop me from joining the run. the end. haha

* thursday night i had a scary allergy attack. scary because my allergies usually just bring me to an indefinite wheeze fest to the point of my ribs aching, but never rashes. round red itchy spots, sprouting on all parts of my body, aching to be scratched. around 8pm that night i started getting itchy on my shoulders. when i went to the bathroom i realized my arms are already full of uninvited redness, and so are my thighs and torso. craaaaaap. >XS i got really scared and wondered what i could possibly have eaten that may have caused the outbreak.

it was really unusual because the only different thing i ate that day would be a cinnamon roll from starbucks, but i had it for breakfast so if i was allergic to it, that's quite a big delay for a reaction. plus, it's not my first time eating that. T__T the only other food item i ate is a homemade tuna sandwich, which is - again -, not new to me. i was wondering if i came in contact with some higad or something, or maybe it's just that my jacket hasn't been washed in 3 weeks na haha! ewan ko ba.

i wanted to rush to the ER but i have a ton of stuff to do (read: OT) and i might not be able to finish it on time if uhm, prioritize my health. #chos

ano raw? kala mo kung sinong workaholic and super dedicated employee eh no.

nope. don't put in that basket cos i'm hardly employee of the month material. haha i'm just concerned about my tasks, which should be finished a lot of days prior but then look at me! with no sense of urgency, and a habit of cramming, you'd really think i'm one big nominee for the most-dedicated-kahit-kinakati-na-sya award ON THAT DAY. the previous weeks were so blah i just want to get home and sleep.

which leads me to the real "dejavu"

Overtime and time again

i've been struggling to accept the "fact" that my job is really prone to OTs. around this time 2 years ago, it was also OT season for our team because we had to finish a development project. uhuh. sounds family diba. haha i don't really mind rendering over times, you get extra money for what it's worth, but you lose precious sleep. something my mom has been aggressively nagging me about most  specially when i decided to work for 15 straight hours, jog at the break of dawn, then head back to work for another 7 hours.

she was so mad, and i was so sorry. i was awake for some 30 hours total and honestly Starbucks' Cafe Americano did the most part in keeping my nerves up. it's a crazy upper. i love it. but i'm not taking it unless i really really need to stay awake for long hours. >XS that's a tip and a word of warning for you, so... you're welcome! haha

Time trial

5k group reprezent!

if i told anyone i was jogging after an almost double shift, they'd most probably think i'm stupid. and i would to. i knew i was being stupid by choosing to run despite an apparent lack of sleep. maybe that's what all nighters do to your brain, they suck out your reasoning and push you to do self destructive things. >XS

but i didn't regret it. i was so alive the entire run. i had a good 3k run around UMAK's oval (from qc to makati in the break of dawn! oyeah!), and the blasted drills worked me up big time. then there's our carbo loading party after that got me extremely elated because someone brought MAKI. trays full of maki. maki that i happily devoured. i was literally glued to the chair where the maki's are sitting. i was so happy. >XD the run was worth it. i didn't feel weak or anything... but i knew i still had to rest. of course. >XD

Soooooo...

that was last week! how was your week? :D

a dream is a wish your heart makes

i just had one of my most vivid dreams ever. here it goes:

//start dream

i was in the office and ms. sheela, one of our bootcamp trainers, approached me to talk to me in private. i was already apprehensive of the news. i knew they were gonna fire me so i asked her politely and quite happily if i'm going to be truncated. she said, "ayon." while smiling and flipping through some papers in her hand (which i thought was my termination letter already). haha

after the announcement, though, i was extremely happy. what's wrong with me. seriously. i was even excited about what happened. i was all too perky even as i told my batchmates i'll be leaving soon.

after that i called one of my friends, brendo, to refer me to HP cos i'm sure to finally accept their offer this time. hahaha!

when i got home i asked my sister if everything is real, that i'm finally jobless, and she said "of course not!"

//end dream

that's when i woke up, to the deafening sound of the rain pouring down, completely saddened by the fact that  i'm still 2.5 years away from uhhh, freedom?

what could this possibly mean? HAHAHA henako. i need some heavy career counseling talaga. >XD

a dream in bullets

- mela dancing like crazy doing her 18th birthday video
- tall blonde guy in pink pants chasing me (us?)
- ate a muffin, saw that it has strands of hair, complained to the owner but he just shrugged
- owner happened to be sweeney todd. urhgk

panaginip!

in fairness naka-alala ako ng panaginip! kanina lang to eh, i dreamt about someone i know (sa office yata). sa panaginip ko, kasama ko sya somewhere, shopping ata not sure then while walking he kissed me on my left cheek! hindi ko tinanong kung bakit pero gusto kong tanungin na, "pre, yung totoo, may gusto ka ba sakin?"  pero shempre hindi ko tinanong. inassume ko na lang haha. hindi ko na maalala yung nangyari after pero may naalala ako na he hugged me from behind. answett naman. di ko na rin maalala ung ibang detalye. nakakakilig naman. at yung suot nya sa panaginip ko yun din yung suot nya nung huli ko syang nakita so mejo vivid yung dream. HAHA

pero napaisip ako dun sa taong yon, bakit sya? crush ko ba sya subconsciously? mejo attractive naman tong tao na to per hindi ganun eh? dahil ba naasar ako sa kanya nung huli kaming nagkita? kaya hanggang panaginip nang-aasar? T_T;

anyway, who cares! i loooove my boyfriend forever and ever! yeyyy! <3 <3 <3

nanaginip ako! at naalala ko!!

one of the rare ocassions that i actually remember my dreams when i woke up! these are just fragments though...

// i was in some sort of exhibit and there were 2 cockroaches at sight. i was with a friend but i can't remember who basta when the cockroaches were ready to attack, i screamed his name for help and i grabbed one of the styro baords for defense and just continuously smacked it aimlessly on the air. i remember smacking a cockroach face down. i felt triumphant LOL but then, the other cockroach sortof took revenge and flew straight to me! eeew, my styro shield was no help as i fell to the ground and screamed AAAAAHH. then i woke up... screaming parin. nakakaloka.

// in this certain fragment, may special guest tayo... Angelica Panganiban! hahaha i dunno where i was but in that particular scene, angelica was wearing an ostentatious red dress, bright red lipstick and an equally kitschy fascinator! she looks like she came straight out from her taping of Here Come's the Bride hahaha. in that scene, the driver dropped her off in the middle of the street and she was grumbling about it. the sky was gloomy and a tornado was brewing and i was behind the bushes ata, watching the clouds. then suddenly, the clouds turned into a shape of a dragon which slithered down the pasture, destroying the crops and blahhh... it was freaking scaryyy so i ran for my life. tapos while running down the hill i saw a dog also running for his life, then it tripped and i heard it crying so i caught it up in my arms and pacified the poor thing. and kyot kyot kyot nung aso parang maliit ng golden retriever slash cocker spaniel tas naglalaway na sa takot. ganun. ang kyot. ang scary. then gising na ko.

// third dream! i was in a room with my crush from work HAHAHA. inaasar ko lang sya na ang gwapo gwapo nya. tas sya naman nagdedeny lang, nagtatago pa sa unan. yun lang. anlandi haha.

black as the pit from pole to pole

whatever. random line from some poem i read some time ago.

lol i have a very big problem staying awake at the office during the morning. but i have an even bigger problem keeping my consciousness during meetings. someone tell me what to do! i'm wasting hours on my desk drooling off and not being productive. >XS hayy.

 //people problems [semi-resolved]

 from now on, whenever i get a bad first impression about someone, i'll keep the person in my "People-to-get-to-know-more list". It's to help me decrease the harnessing of evil thoughts about someone and also to give the person the benefit of the doubt. recently, i met someone who at first contact insulted me indirectly. since then, i kinda vowed never to talk to her or even try to befriend her. it's pretty simple really, i have a "don't like? don't mind" mindset against people i hate. the less i interact with them, the less my mind is filled with evil thoughts. then just recently ulit, i kind of grew closer (in terms of proximity) to the person because of a project and as much i hate the idea of it, i had to live professionally LOL. eventually, the irrate feeling turned to sincere friendship (yuck parang anlalim agad ng pinagsamahan eh no) and i felt sorry (deep inside) for being so quick to judge. kkkk nung isang araw pa to eh nakalimutan ko lang ipost haha

 //i woke up from a bad bad dream this morning

 here it goes... i was headed home from SM with my sister and we rode a lagro jeep. i was carrying a bag with a laptop and i saw a suspicious looking man eyeing my bag. he looked like a thief so i kept throwing dagger like stares at him while clutching tighter to my bag. a young boy was also with him, probably a thief too. then suddenly, they moved to get my bag! whoa no! i rose from my seat and tried to make bugaw them away. ang tapang ko grabe. but deep inside i was frakking scared, but right there i looked like i was ready to fight the goon and a half-man with whatever fighting skills i have (screaming maybe?).

 then the thief went down the jeep and made motion na parang naghahamon and i was like , seriously? i can judo** you! but then, i was really scared so uhm, i dunno what happened next. i think the jeep left without him but he kept chasing me so di ako mapakali. i transferred jeeps along the way and sat near the driver and ducked on the floor to hide, but when i raised my head to check, i saw the thief's face on the jeep next to us and he saw mine too and he had a lagot-kang-bata-ka-sakin look on his face before coming down and chasing me agaaaain! i went off at fcm and hid inside the mall, and when the coast was clear i went home alone.

 when i came back, i texted terai to ask where she was cos i almost forgot i was with her pala on the jeep! when she came back, she was crying as she said, "tinali nya kaya kami!" showing the rope the thief used to tie her hands (and others too). so back there they were taken as hostages pala to get my LAPTOP what the heck. and she remembers one of the passengers saying she'll try to contact me for the laptop so he an release them. then terai also said the police caught him naman. hahaha

 now that i'm telling you, it sounds funny pala. hey and you know what, i can clearly remember the man's face although he's a total stranger to me! he looked like a shorter and bald version of jess lapid.

like that! but younger and a bit thinner, and with less facial hair. grabeee hahaha

noightmoire

i dunno if it was a nightmare or something but as soon as i lay down to sleep last night at around 4.30am, i immediately got super groggy and the noise around me became unpleasant. the sound of the ruffling leaves and the grass and dried leaves being stepped on became points of paranoia to me. i suddenly trembled with fear, there was a man trying to get on my window with a gun and i could sense it. grabe yung trauma. the first thing i thought was to get up and rescue terai from the other room, thinking that the bad guy would want to assault her too but dammit my limbs were glued to the bed. srsly. i was too scared to get up. i tried to wake up by opening my eyes but the atmosphere didn't change, it's as if the guy is still waiting for a chance to kill me. i wanted to run to terai's room and sleep there but my fear tied me down my bed. >:'( my prayers didn't work either. it's none of those dreams where you know it's from a bad spirit because any attempt to mention Jesus' name would render you speechless, you know they were trying to stop you from calling God for help. but this one is too different, i say 'in Jesus' name' and was surprised to have said it too easily, like no evil force is restraining me to do it. super scary. >:'(

moar dreams

it's been a while since i last blogged about my dreams! i hardly remember any of them anymore because the alarms always disrupt them. anyhow!

I. i dreamt that i failed the interview with the starbucks store manager. that's like the last step before getting into barista training. the sm was kindof petite, fair skinned and sorta chinita girl. her hair was long and tied. i think she kinda said that the main office endorsed me too late that she already accepted 2 applicants. there was a small sheet of paper with the 2 names written on it, including their available working hours. i didn't get the names tho. hehe then i was crying and practically begging her to gimme a chance whatever. then my boyfriend came and asked the sm why she's making me cry. apparently, terai who was with me in the store texted him so he came and blah. bwahahahaha weird.

II. this was only awhile ago. but i already forgot most of it! >XO what i do remember is my school mate, olibs, ushering me somewhere to talk or something. cos i think she's consoling me about something bad that happened. something that led to so many people hating me or something. hehe puro something hahahaha. she was like, 'don't think about it too much. i've been hated by so many people too.' then i recalled how she was during highschool and thought, yeah maybe. i don't exactly hate her back then, but we were never close. the place was like holy corridors. or something. okay!!! something something something.

binondo mode! >:D

good morning?

this week was full of crap. i don't know! everything that has happened since wednesday is major bullcrap.
my grades went down.
quit OJT to find something new.
applied everywhere and realized i'm wasting so much money for this.
enrolled and got overly pissed off with their new policy.

oh well, tears are in for me this september. >:| i don't know why. perhaps the only good thing that balances all of this is jec! for me he's a breather and.... oryt i'm trying not to be cheesy cos i'm saving it for next year so yeah. i'll stop the jec-talk here bwahaha. because of him i could say life is still good. God still loves me. >:D

yesterday, or last friday cos technically it's ardy sunday. i had a mini chika-slash-pep talk with jigger, the CBS secretary who's doing so much work and initative for the team. i owe him so much because i feel like i'm not doing anything at all. he should be president, not me, seriously... if for the amount of work he initiates for the student council. and you know what, i told him that. that i feel sorry for being useless and all. >XO hahaha it was cool talking to him, he lifted my spirits a bit! HAHA mega nega kasi ako, no amount of pep talk could probably lift me up from my depression. ako lang talaga.ewan. basta. i appreciate him!

btw, i dreamt of him one time. in my dream, i was packing my things. i had two back packs, mine and jec's. then he carried one of them. i don't remember which but he was waiting for me ekek and took the bag to help. the end!

i also remember dreaming about francis magalona. in my dream, i had a major crush on him and blah. i don't remember na! i should've written this earlier when it's still a bit intact in my memory. henako.

earlier was so fun! my cousins and nieces and nephews were here for mamay's death anniv. >:D >:D kapagod ampotek. aaaah, i actually consider my nieces and nephews as my cousins, and my cousins as my titos and titas because of the age gap. my cousins are all twice older, and their children are nearer my age so daryugow. >:)

i'm not sleepy though i'm very tired! >XO ewan ko ba.

terai and i are planning on trying Craving's unlimited coffee and cake for P150 tomorrow!!! i read a bad review about it knina lang e so... tsk nakakainis tuloy. takam na takam pa naman kami! sana magpa-ganun din yung RED RIBBON!!! gusto ko ng canteana cheescake. argggh chaka choco banana cake! huhuhu gutom na ko! >XO

Good mornight!

JM!

i dreamed of JM last night, or this morning whatever while having fever fits. bwaha in my dream he was on the way to the tricycle area and i saw him and blah and i was disappointed cos he looked poor? oo basta ganun. parang nalungkot ako na nanghinayang na ewan. ayoko na tuloy sa kanya LOOOOL mukang pera ampotek. mukang pera daw kasi ako.

off to school cos i feel better now >:)

Day 5 - A time you thought about ending your own life

I don't remember the reason but i remember wanting to slash my wrists with salon clips hehehe
Haynakowww i feel super duper bitter today, and also yesterday! rarrrr >:| Hindi ako pinag-SA sa graduation! nakaka-inggit na nakakainis!!! okay lang naman na hindi eh, kasi naglabas sila ng list nung thurs ng sasama sa grad e wala ako so okay lang kasi may iba rin namang wala. pero kinabukasan, i learned that even those na wala sa list... sumama sa grad practice sa morayta for i dunno what reason so sobrang sumama yung loob ko cos i was literally the only SA left sa registrar's office and it sucked so much. parang connivance ekek. so binuhos ko na lang yung galit galit ko sa pag-gghost. leche talaga. leche. ansakit ng katawan ko tuloy. >:|

chaka lumalala na rin ang kaplastikan ko. dibale sa pasukan, i'll get rid of you. sino ba ko para pagsabihan ka... ni hindi nga tropa ang tingin ko sayo eh, naki-sawsaw ka lang eh. hindi rin ako concerned sayo. guilty lang ako. kasi ayoko magmukang masama sus. kung alam mo lang.

gusto ko na grumaduate. as in. gusto ko na ng bagong crowd. bagong tao. bagong friends. ibang pinag-kaka-abalahan. chaka pera shempre.

hey i dreamt of Yeorim kagabi lang.. or kanina.
in my dream we were in an outing somewhere na may water falls basta yun masaya kami dun nagkkwentuhan blah tapos parang umalis yata kami, nagbike tapos naka-angkas ako sa kanya yun lang. hehe >:)

occupational hazards

2 hours to go before i time out! >XD

i woke up pretty late today, and to add up to the panic, i woke up to my boss' text message! she said she'll be late and i that i should attend to the speaker when he arrives. O_O so i got up and brushed my teeth and blah, i was about to take a bath when she texted that the speaker has already arrived and that she's still on the way!!! haha okay, so forget about my morning bath!!!  i sped to the closet and pulled out something to wear. i sneaked out of the house (cos mommy's gonna scold me for skipping breakfast) and head on to school.

crazy haggard morning!

anyway, because of the very few turnout of attendees, they rescheduled the seminar to a later saturday. which means, we'll be having a total of 5 saturdays to offset! >XD hehehe and also because of that, my boss left early. leaving me in the custody of another boss who also left early so i'm down with nothing (or a very few things) to do... like having the food delivered for the AdEPT trainers and uninstalling stuff on the lab. other than that, i'm working on Burger Shop 2 and surfin around. >:)

seriously!
also, i'm getting hideously fat (exaggeration of course). i've been eating mcdonald's chicken fillet with rice + sundae for four consecutive dinners now.ajksdghasdgsad

i'm also aware that i must work my brain harder this year so i could earn a latin honor at least! it's one thing to be a chemical engineering wreck and a computer science success bwahaha. i want to say goodbye to my social life for a while looool and also my REM life... much to my dismay.

Dreams Dreams!
- i dreamt of Tirso twice! i just forgot about it.

- i also dreamt about chii. in my dream she was guiding me on a mega dark staircase, she was holding my hand if i remember correctly, and we were running up the stairs, onto a supposed to be 'shortcut' that we could use to get out of the building (i dunno what and where).

then we saw a narrow passageway, behind it was a wall with a movie playing on it via projector. it was the shortcut we're looking for. there was an old man sort of guarding-slash-watching the place and he kindof told us 'yes, this is the way' and we went down... and out of the building!

then i saw JM outside, texting. haha yun lang.
actually, the dream was scary. >X(

PS: one day i'm gonna ask terai to go on an ELBI day-out with me! i probably need 1,500 for the entire uhm, memory-lane-trip, but that's (i think) enough for the fare and food.
LOL fudtrip lang naman talaga gusto ko eh...
specifically

-Janges cheeseburger and large chocobanana shake
-Bordo's cheeseburger
-Proven
-Mernel's chocolate cake
-The Original's banana cake
-DTRI ChocoMilk
-IRRI walktrip + canteen

e ang sarap kasi kumain sa elbi. nakakamiss!

piolo in my dreams

dream segments entry again cos i keep on snoozing the alarm clock!

I.
// movie night out at trinoma with UP AChES brods and sisses but i only saw the brods, specifically kuya jhomar and kuya omeng.
// walking along trinona i saw tsia (from hs). tapos kuya jhomar was calling out to us to buy tickets already cos the lines are long.
// tas parang i walked along dun sa part na fountain dapat pero walang tubig tas nung dumaan ako nagkatubig so nabasa ako. eh. naalala ko yung suot ko, green shirt, red shorts! >:))

II.
// at home, we were eating dinner yata tapos mommy showed as a plate of exotic food. exotic = snake. galing sa ref so malamig at immobile sya. maliit lang yung snake sa plato, kulay brown, mga isang ruler ang haba. bale ulo ng anaconda, buntot ng rattle snake. sabi ni mama vibrator snake daw yun. tas kinuha ni mama yung snake tas biglang nagising! as in nag-'ssssssss'. di naman natuklaw si mama haha pero natakot ako.
// tas naghuhugas daw ako ng pinggan tas tong si ate wilma nag-scary face sa may bintana sa harap ko tas naasar ako pinagalitan ko yata na wag ako tatakutin ng ganon blah blah blah.

III.
// somewhere sa bahay, either basement or kitchen di ako sure. me mga nakakulong na mga kalalakihan sa isang kwarto tas nakadungaw sila dun sa parang window. muntanga lang pero as i remember, lahat ng faces nila blacked out sa paningin ko. di ko sila kilala. tas ako yata nagbabantay blah blah tas natuwa yata ako so inalok ko sa kanila yung upuan ko sabi ko, "gusto nyo upuan?" tas binuhat ko papunta sa kanila tas parang narealize ko na gagamitin nila yun para tumakas so binawi ko.
// e naabot na pala nila! i mean ni PIOLO. ok so nakikipag-agawan ako ng upuan kay piolo sa aking panaginip e lamnyo naman sa panaginip pag-action na ang genre, biglang slowmo lahat parang nawalan ng gravity sa mundo. wala akong kalakas lakas tas parang lumulutang na ko sa ere sa kakahila sa upuan. haha
// in short nakatakas sila. tas hina-hunting ko sila isa isa sa bahay ala spy. tas me nakita ako isa so i kinda glomped on him eh si ace pala (bf ng barkada ko). tas ayon. di ko na maalala.
//lumabas ako sa gate tas nakita ko me mga van na nahihintay sa labas. as i recall, sila yata yung mga "bossing" na nagpa-kidnap yata dun sa mga preso namin blah blah e nakatakas nga diba so yung isang lolo dun, "HANAPIN SILA" so bumalik ako sa loob, tas me pinasunod na alagad (mejo afro yata) si "bossing" tas bumaba sya dun sa basement na pinaghihinalaang pinagtataguan ng mga katatakas lang na kalalakihan.
//nung bumaba sya, di ako sumunod feeling ko kasi babarilin sya dun. tas nung nasa baba na nga sya, me nagbato ng, oh well, oversized santol. feeling ko fruit bomb yun so...

nagising ako. haha

noightmeyer

terai was reading her horoscope and it was bad. she was in her room, and i was there doing some ironing. she looked desperate and frustrated and was in the verge of violently throwing things out of anger. then she calls out to the freakin newspaper... something like "what do i have to do to blah blah blah?!?!??!!!" then there's a freakin voice who responded, "do you really want to know?" in a deep manly voice i could assume was the devil. then it whispered something to terai, something like "SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR MOM AND KILL YOURSELF".

and then terai was freaking heading to mommy and i was like alarmed and crying like crazy so i raced to mommy as well haha parang, "MAAAAAA!!!!" sabay iyak! then idk what happened next basta next thing i know i was chasing terai upstairs and was still crying like baboy cos i freakin don't want her to kill her freaking self, then she went to her room and i was like "NOOOOOOOOOO!!! *don't lock the doooooor*"

well, she didn't. and i was like "HUHUHU TERAI PAGUSAPAN NATIN TOOOOO"
then i woke up sniffing and crying. alam nyo yung mega iyak with matching sinok pa. nakakainissss. kaparanoid lang eh so i texted terai. e wala lang.

okasi diba ansarap syumesta ng hindi nagdadasal. >:\

dream within a dream?

yess ang haba ng hair ko sa panaginip ko! >:))) inaway daw ni james si brian dahil sinaktan at pinaiyak ako. suntukan, sosyal! tas mejo pinapanuod ko lang sila tas pinipicturan habang umiiyak haha anlabo. tapos tapos nagvanity shot din ako tas nakita ko antanda ko na! with wrinkles and everything! kaloka! @_@ weird casting din pala.

tas nagising ako sa alarm clock so shempre ini-snooze ko. e patay yung ilaw, e dapat mag-aaral ako so binuksan ko. e ayaw bumukas so pinuntahan ko si daddy sabi ko papalit ng ilaw. e ayaw nya so natulog ulit ako.

tas nung nagising ako bukas na yung ilaw tas patay na yung alarm clock tas 2am na. narealize ko, panaginip lang pala yung kanina. kasi hindi ko pinatay yung ilaw bago ako natulog. nakaka-confuse in fairness.

me isang part na andun si yannah at martin tas nagbbike ako sa LB yata yon.

tas me isang part din na nagpipicture kami ni mommy, daddy, terai sa kalsada (ewan ko kung san) tas parang webcam shots yung lumabas, yung me warp effect. ekek

tapos yun. puro fragments sya kasi alarm ako ng alarm e tulog parin naman ako ng tulog. so ngayon, eto ica-cram ko muna yung mga dapat isulat.

good morning!

panaginip

i was in a beach wedding tas magkaka-tsunami daw. we were on the shore na e when the water started receding so i grabbed my bag dun sa table, along with stuff on it. naalala ko me dalawang bible dun eh, i grabbed both tas parang yun lang dapat dadalin ko pero kinuha ko parin yung ibang mga bagay bagay sa lamesa.

end dream.

johnny and jenny

i dreamed about the young johnny and jenny from Endless Love awhile ago. in my dream, it was raining and jenny was inside a taxi, crying. johnny was outside, head bent down, soaking wet, topless and sortof bleeding . they weren't talking in korean but i don't understand what's happening. i think jenny was calling johnny to come inside cos it's raining. she won't stop crying. heh ewan ewan i'm not even sure if i was just watching from somewhere, or if i was jenny (pwede ba yun? you playing a different character in your dream?). when johnny came in, pinatahan nya si jenny. then another couple came into the scene, they saw j&j in the taxi. i think the other girl was jenny's sister from Cinderella's Sister. forgot the name e haha, the guy, ewan ko kung sino.

basta when they saw the two in the taxi, parang nagselos si girl. heh. basta. HAHAHA
ang gwapo ni johnny!

ok. ang saya lang magkacrush. >XD

i dreamt about this. @_@

i freakin dreamt about this! not this but what just happened a few seconds ago! i was about to disconnect to sun broadband and thought, hey this scene looks familiar. after i cut off the connection, i recalled dreaming about this some time ago. then i saw the 'network cable unplugged' notif on the desktop.... then thought about april cos the usb stick is from her then i thought, hey! i thought of april in that dream too! and there was a taskbar notif! then i was so amazed that i just needed to blog about it, so i opened sun bro to reconnect and though, WHAT THE HEY in my dream i actually reconnected to the internet!!! mindblowwwwnnn

woa. this is weird! it's like realizing that you knew all along what's gonna happen, and that you only recalled it when it's already unfolding and there's nothing you can do. it's pretty useless and creepy. not the first time it happened but it's a bit different cos i remember in fragments and not in wholes.

that's as far as it went. wahaha coooool.

Lord can you stretch this? hahaha i wanna dream of something that's gonna happen in the future, and remember it like 5 minutes before it unfolds. kasi the longer the waiting time, the more doubtful it becomes. 5 minutes lang haha. ay wag na lang pala. scary. WAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

what if every time you sleep, you dream of your entire lifetime in fragments? and that every time you wake, you step into a fragment of your dream but never realize it?

idunno! good night! will think about this tomorrowww >8D

killing me softly

will donate blood later!

hey i dreamt about jc and jen. in my dream, jc has already graduated and became a science teacher. i was chatting with him and jen got mad. argh nagselos daw. so they kinda left me. we were at sm megamall cinema section, about to donate books. ayon. i brought a lot of books with me and i have to register them one by one, book by book, including the ISBN's what the heeeell hassle. anyway, they have this automated book registering machine, and there i was... about to donate a pile of pocket books. >:O

wala lang. i dunno. significance please?

i'm back to xp pro sp2 bangketa version. i was finally able to install SQL Server 2005... thanks to the hotfix! but there's still a bug, i realized that if i installed it using a password protected administrator account, every time i log in the BSOD will appear and the PC will restart. anyhow, when it did and i was taken back to the login screen, i logged on to my sister's account (admin, no password) and got in. then i was able to use the software with ease and blah. so i kindof thought that if i disable the password, i'll be able to log in on my account without the friggin bitch screen of doom.

and it worked.
so. what was this problem all about? at first i was confident it was sortofa setup issue, after all the hotfix worked like magic. but still, you know, i got a BSOD on a password protected admin account. so what gives?

k.whatev! at least it doesn't reboot ad infinitum! and i can use XP!
fine.fine. gotta get ready to lose half a litter of blood!

yey! >XD LOL
why am i excited to donate blood.