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Tuesday, December 28, 2021

Today

I think I've always been someone who's easily stressed, but the pandemic just made me more aware of it. I'm still twirling my hair compulsively like a madman and while it drives me crazy knowing there's something mentally wrong with me, I haven't even taken the first step into identifying what the fuck is causing me to break my hair so much. I'm pretty sure it's stress related, more specifically, work related. I got a promotion this year and it only feels more damning knowing I have to perform much better, right when I was already okay with my performance level and would like to keep it that way for my sanity's sake. The promotion was surreal though, and I'm grateful for it, as it finally placed me on my dream income bracket. It's a dream come true, but it's also fucking fleeting. Like wow I'm finally here huh? So this is it? What changed though? Cos it's not like I got a big leap, I was already inching towards that number, slowly but surely closing the gap. And when it finally came, somehow it didn't strike me as much. Like I said it's not a big leap and it wasn't such a big jump that would afford us to move to a bigger apartment, so somehow it didn't feel like such an achievement. Which is actually a good thing. Slow progress like this allowed me to focus on my growth. Instead of running after a number, I've learned to work towards increasing my worth, so the number just came naturally.

I thank God for a lot of things this year, despite all the work stresses, I consider 2021 quite a fruitful one. I got a promotion, I'm getting a good annual increase next year (my biggest yet), so far I've read 12 books, watched 42 movies, finished 50 seasons (I'll try to make a roundup post for this list), got monetized on Youtube, reached my set threshold in less than a year, and never got hospitalized. I also started going to the gym.

Today...

...is the 28th day of December and we're currently in an airbnb in a private subdivision in Tagaytay. It's extremely cold, the wind has been howling violently for hours, and it's freaking stressing me out. I think it's mostly because our car is parked outside by the gutter and for some reason I'm afraid it would get flown away lol. Well last night it didn't so I guess I have to dial down on the anxiety. But still, it's been shuddering the windows that this house is unfortunately so full of so I don't think I'm sleeping well tonight.

Speaking of anxiety. My husband knows how much I despise being with a lot of people, and for the whole of December we've been meeting people non-stop every weekend. I wanted to take a break from socialising and maybe finish a 13th book this year, but I also wanna give it to him cos he likes being around people. It's just one month anyway and after the festivities are over I could go back to cowering under the sheets with my Kindle and lo-fi jazz playlist. As an introvert with a self-diagnosed high functioning anxiety, I think I've done pretty well managing my awkwardness this season. Well, my hair has been the receiving end of all my stress lately but thank God it's not balding yet. I should be worried.

Time jump!

I was writing all of the above earlier when we were still in Tagaytay. Now we've driven out and I'm back at my desk, marveling at my new set of keycaps.


Hopefully I don't replace this anymore but who knows. As a mechanical keyboard fan I'm just not too deep into the hobby yet to try other types of mods. I'm fine with just switching the keycaps. It's already troublesome enough having to pull out the caps one by one lol haha and I think that's the best effort I could give my keyboards for now.

Alright that's it! See you next year! :)

Thursday, December 16, 2021

How to Avoid Clothing Malfunctions and Hide Body Rolls?

Sometimes, no matter how good your clothes are, accidents and malfunctions still happen. It is indeed stressful when you catch yourself off-guard and do not know what to do in times of emergency. 


But, there is always an acceptable difference between knowing what to do in unforeseen events and avoiding them beforehand. The latter will always be the wiser choice. 


Aside from clothing malfunctions, women also note the key points on how to hide their body rolls. These slight unwanted traces of cellulite are one of the biggest insecurities of women today. Hence, it is indeed a blessing to have these body-slimming undergarments in the closet. 


You would probably agree that it is not enough that you know how to respond to these stressful circumstances in your fashion. So, it is best to learn how to avoid them in the first place. In line with this, take note of the following suggestions.

Choose The Right Undergarments


To avoid clothing malfunctions, it would be best if you had the proper undergarments or shapewear. Most wardrobe incidents happen because of the inner clothing that one wears. Remember that not all shapewear that is available within your reach is good for you. 


When you immediately grab any undergarments available, you would most likely stress yourself with unnecessary bulges, skin issues, fabric defects, and whatnot. Do not think that you can always be complacent with your move and your overall get-up just because you can cover it with your main wardrobe. 


You may be thinking of ways on how to get the right shapewear for you. First, you have to consider your need. Which part of your body do you want to emphasize? You also have to consider your skin because other shapewear has this fabric that is not friendly to your senses.

Wholesale Black Knee Length Tummy Control Waist Trainer Shorts Custom Logo


Knowing your body better can lead you to the right shapewear because you know the measurement of your waist and hips and the length of your torso. In this way, you can pick the best shapewear for you.


Waistdear offers a line of wholesale shapewear which promises you convenience and comfort. Plus, you have a wide range of options, so you can choose the design and color of what is best for you.

Go With Reliable Features

After your thorough inspection, you may have run through the list of things you want to expect in your wardrobe. You probably have considered their features and seen yourself wearing them. Most waist trainer manufacturers, such as Waistdear, make sure that these features are reliable enough to avoid wardrobe malfunctions. 


For instance, many women go for shapewear pieces with belts such as those from Waistdear because they enhance your body shape, lift your butt, and promise an excellent compression around your waist. In this way, you can avoid exposing your insecurities which involves that unwanted rolls in your tummy.

Wholesale Trendy Black 7 Steel Bones Waist Cincher Double Belts Body Trimmer


Furthermore, you can never go wrong with a simple overall because you do not have to worry about your undergarment's other fringes and features. Besides, most people prioritize their comfort before styles because they can do almost anything when they are comfortable with what they are wearing.

Put Some Add-Ons

Make sure that you carry along with some add-ons to avoid clothing malfunctions. For instance, denim jackets can be a lifesaver when you accidentally rip your blouse with thin fabrics. Your jacket will instantly rescue your overall fashion statement as you cover the unwanted holes and scratches of your primary garment. Imagine the wonder it can make that it covers the flaws and body rolls and gives you an instant fashion upgrade. 

Your shapewear can also serve as your add-ons; in fact, it can be your primary outfit. All you need to do is look for a perfect match that can add to your glam. For example, tuck it in with fashionable shorts. It is a highly-suggested style to avoid clothing malfunctions.

Wholesale Plunge Low-Back Thong Shapewear Bodysuit Compression

Wholesale Everyday Shaping Full Body Shaper Big Size Lace Trim

Always Inspect

One of the best things to do to avoid wardrobe malfunction is to inspect your wardrobe first. For example, if you choose wholesale shapewear, it would always be best to research the product and the manufacturers. It may be a silly thing for some, but most people realize that knowing the virtues and integrity of a company can benefit the consumers in the long run. Besides, who would not want to wear a product that comes from an honest manufacturer? Who would not go for a company with the reputation of putting consumers' welfare ahead of their own?


Secondly, it would help you avoid wardrobe malfunctions if you inspect the fabric, the straps, and the crotches to look ahead to the possible downtimes of wearing them.

Go For Lightweight And Simple

You would most likely free yourself from the hassle when you go for a lightweight and simple wardrobe, particularly when it comes to shapewear. Most shapewear companies consider creating straightforward undergarments to pave the way for more convenience to their consumers. Indeed, the lighter the product, the less chance of wardrobe malfunctions. 

One of the best shapewear pieces from Waistdear is the Big Size Body Shaper Tummy Control which shows a simple package that anyone can quickly wear. It is suitable for any clothing, especially tight-fitting ones. It also features removable straps so that you can go for a tubed dress or a backless top.  

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Wholesale Lightweight Adjustable Straps Big Size Body Shaper Tummy Control


In the world of fashion, it is not enough that you look good. It would help if you also felt good and comfortable about your style. This kind of comfort rarely happens when your wardrobe is prone to malfunction and to expose your unwanted feature on your body. 


Hence, it is always wise to look ahead and know how to avoid that kind of unforeseen event in your clothing. Although accidents happen in ways you do not expect, it is always good to do your best not to take that path.

Thursday, December 9, 2021

Injured again

I started going to the gym on December 1 on my husband's behest hahaha. He wouldn't grant me my choice of birthday gift, instead he enrolled me in a nearby gym where he started a month earlier. I didn't like it at first but it really helped me feel better about my health. I want to be stronger and more fit and be able to do pull ups one day haha. I'm also grateful for Jeckie cos he's always looking out for me. This is probably my favorite birthday gift hehe.


I got injured three days ago but I'm doing much better now. The trauma though is something I need to work on. I was crying when coach was stretching me earlier because I was too afraid to fold my knee. I'm afraid it would snap, or twist, or whatever, leaving me in permanent disrepair. But it's all in the mind, I gathered after surviving that session. I was never hurt the whole time, I was just anticipating it. And fear, when held on for too long becomes too real. In my case, it's pain. For others, it could be more damning.


Usually it's my right knee that gets injured more often, leaving my left leg to compensate. Now that it's the other way around, I hope they finally get even?? Hahaha does it even work that way.

For some reason I enjoyed coming to the gym. Maybe because every day is a new set so the workouts vary and I don't come to dread the routine. One day it's upper body, one day it's core, another day it's footwork, etc. I'm enjoying the variety because it allows my sore body parts to recover while working on other target areas. Also, having a coach to guide and push me means a lot!


My Miniso coffee maker broke this weekend and I was devastated. I have a pour-over and french press as backup but nothing beats the speed and convenience of an automatic coffee maker. I'm the only one who drinks coffee in the house and I drink at least 2 mugs and I love it when I can just pour myself a hot cup when I want to.

I got the Miniso coffee maker from an exchange gift with my cousins two years ago. After it broke, I looked for the exact same coffee maker to no avail. But I did get something that's built exactly the same, except that it's black and is from a different brand. I figured it's the perfect replacement haha. Same size and parts, even the carafe fits. And it's less than 1,000. Jeckie got it for me as a Christmas gift! Thank you! ♥

I was actually eyeing this automatic drip coffee maker from Delonghi but after looking at the specs, it's too tall for a 5-cup coffee maker and I didn't like the glossy white hehe.


The year is coming to an end and I'm feeling hopeful that things would turn out better next year. We're all fully vaccinated in the family so that's good. Jeckie and I will probably be summoned back to the office to work soon. I know I need to get back to the office to regain my uhm motivation but I also dread that day because it means I need to get up super early if I wanted to go to the gym, plus I have to spend more for transpo (ie. GrabTaxi) because the EDSA carousel removed the nearest bus stop from our condo and Ortigas and Guadalupe terminals are too far to walk to! Arrghh. I usually only spend 15 pesos going to the office by bus, now It's gonna cost me 180 urgh.

Haha anyway. Will be on a staycation with my family tomorrow! Looking forward to it! Gotta sleep! :D

Tuesday, November 30, 2021

Life lately and my latest read (It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover)

I learned a bunch of new keyboard shortcuts today hahaha it's the shortcuts for ♥, ♦, and • respectively. That's a heart, a diamond, and a bullet point. I can't believe it took me this long to discover the correct alt codes for them. They're ALT + 3, ALT + 4, and ALT + 7 respectively yeheyy.

If you're wondering why it matters, they're my most used symbols when writing Youtube descriptions. And all these (two) years, I'm freaking copy pasting it from Google or from my old descriptions. So yeah, I'm pretty happy about it! And to make it easier to remember, the ♥ already looks like a 3 as in the <3 emoticon, a ♦ has 4 points, and I don't know about the • I guess the 7 looks like a gun or something, so may bullets haha or maybe connect the dots? Idk I think I've thought hard enough to not forget about it haha.



I finished reading It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover before going to bed this morning and I gave it 3 stars on Goodreads.

SPOILER ALERT
(I just used the kb shortcut for ♦ I'm so happy wahahaha)

I've never read anything like this before. One thing I liked about it is the perspective it gave me on domestic violence and abusive relationships. How it's not that easy to leave immediately once you start getting hurt physically. It starts once, then you forgive, because maybe it was an accident, or he was so sorry about it and promised not to do it again. Then it happens again and he's more sorry and your heart can't take it. You're bruised and confused but your love and compassion keeps pushing your limit further and further 'til it disappears into the brink of tolerance. Then one day you get slapped and you think you're lucky you just got slapped. It's awful. This book made me feel really hurt about the reality of such relationships. And the fact that it's drawn from Colleen's mother's personal experience only fleshed it out even more. It's a painful tale which ends right. I can't say it ends happily, but the ending is right and makes sense. I actually love it.

What I didn't like though are the characters. I didn't really care much for them. I struggled to read the first half cos it's fucking smut and I usually don't mind tropes granted they're explained well and makes sense. This book exhibited tons of it but it's super boring and cliche, there's insta-love, a love triangle, I'm-not-like-most-girls, and lots of sex I want to throw it off fanfiction.net.

It's my third CoHo and now I'm getting used to her style. She likes to mix young/new adult tropes with traumatic backstories, if only to make the plotline more emotional unlike most YA's. I actually like it as it's more psychological than fantastical and her storytelling tugs more at your feelings than your imagination. 

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Yeahhh so that's my life lately? Keyboard shortcuts and a book? HAHAHA daming ganap no but I hey i just uploaded a new vlog, check it outt


PS. I was supposed to work for real today but guess what huhu please pray for me. Half the time I think I should go work in the office already to regain motivation but I'm not ready to commute again huhu

Friday, November 19, 2021

Our Okada Manila Experience


Heya! Before you dive into this lengthy post with me ranting and raving about our Okada stay... here's a video I uploaded on YouTube about my birthday celebration...

Watch: My Okada & Nobu Birthday Celebration


Soon! Okada Manila Tour - Deluxe King Bay View, The Retreat Spa, In-Room Dining


I turned 31 on Tuesday and Jeckie and I celebrated it by spending the weekend at Okada Manila and having Omakase dinner at Nobu Restaurant. This post is just gonna focus on Okada. We stayed for 2 nights starting November 13, 2021.


First of all, I was never attracted to Okada Manila. Specially with how it looks in photos. With the obnoxiously pink lobby and the amount of drapes covering the wide columns, it's totally unrelaxing and kinda overkill. For me ha. Had they picked red for a motif, then it's a circus. And it's even more stressful in person cos the lobby is actually smaller than it looks in photos. I'm both overwhelmed and underwhelmed at the same time hahaha.


Nevermind that they placed an enormous Christmas tree at the center, it's all washed out by the glaring pinkness of it all. It's a Casino complex naman daw and not really a hotel per se so every garish design decision at the lobby is probably science-backed to invite as much high rollers as they can.


Alert Level 2 situation yikes

Anyway. Ako lang naman to and it's not like tatambay kami sa lobby wahaha



To my slight dismay the deluxe room is yet another splash of pink.


Good thing there are some muted elements and half the room is occupied by the bathoom which has warm marble tones so yes to familiar elegance!


Oh, the hallways are beautiful too and a far cry from the agressive fuschia lobby. The Retreat Spa is also very very relaxing. I wish they designed it more cohesively. But after learning that Okada is patterned after Macau, the arresting lobby suddenly made sense hehe.

Sorry I'm overreacting. But you know, part of me kinda regrets this staycation decision cos we could've booked somewhere quieter, less busy, and cheaper too... but I must admit, the jacuzzi with an ocean view kinda snagged my attention. At least now I can say I've stayed at Okada!

Enough about how I hated the lobby hahaha... let's move on to other things I hated about our stay hahahaha. Actually there's just one thing but this very basic thing affected our entire stay and that is...

Very high turnaround time...

✖ Checking in? Wait at least 30 minutes in line...
✖ Request for bay view room? If there's none readily available, prepare to wait for another hour...
✖ Wanna call the operator? Wait at least 5 minutes on queue...
✖ In-room dining? Wait 1 hour for your food...
✖ Want extra pillows? They're complimentary but you gotta wait 5 fucking hours for it. I'm serious.

That's how understaffed they are. I guess.


This is the most expensive place we've stayed at (so far) but the response time beats that of cheaper hotels. I'm entitled to feel this way but I also can't get mad at the people because I know they're just trying to deal with the chaos one guest at a time. And I felt that, cos once it's finally our turn to be attended to we were treated professionally and with empathy naman so it's hard not to simmer down.


They knew their guests are struggling with impatience so I appreciate that they don't rush to get to the next guest and is proactive with meeting our needs. Placing requests is a breeze. But it's the eternal waiting that gets to you talaga hahaha. It's just that they're faced with an overwhelming amount of guests, hello Alert Level 2, and they're pretty darned understaffed. That's the only explanation I see fit, otherwise why would my fucking pillows take 5 hours to get delivered lol.

There's nothing 5 star about having to wait too long for a service but I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt because we're still in the middle of suriving a pandemic and every ounce of consideration goes a long way. Plus, they just pretty much reopened after alert levels went down so maybe they haven't fully adjusted yet, what with the sudden surge of overexcited guests (like us haha). 

Now that the negative things are out of the way... here are my favorite things about this staycation...

Ay wait may isa pa palang negative but I'm not sure who's to blame. I woke up with a stye on my left eye for some reason so feeling ko may ipis hahaha. I saw a vlog where it showed there's ipis in the room eh so I can't rule it out. Pero kebs naman at least I wasn't awake to face the horror lol and I brought mefenamic so it helped with inflammation. But it ruined my birthday dinner makeup eh so grrr. 

Osya ito na, my favorite things about our stay...

1. DigiValet - your in-room ipad control panel


This big and heavy ipad controls everything in your room and it's a service portal for everything you wanna request

✔ You can control the TV from it and choose from various channels
✔ They have Netflix, Youtube, and you can cast your Android and Apple device too
✔ You can open and close the curtains
✔ You can adjust the lights and AC
✔ You can order food
✔ You can reserve at the spa
✔ You can request for extra pillows, baby stuff, and PWD assistance
✔ You can settle your bill and check-out without having to go to the lobby

2. Jacuzzi facing the sunset


It's really the experience I'm after and it did not disappoint specially with the sunset view! I have a timelapse in my vlog and it's a splendid sight. The way the sun's reflection shimmers on the roof panels of Cove Manila, the slow turning of colors, haaay it's pretty romantic. 

3. Drip coffee!

I brought my own coffee grounds and pourover but their coffee is also good :)


4. Built-in bidet at the toilet


You know the high-tech stuff with bum sensors and all sorts of nozzle spray options. This one even has a deodorizer and a pwet dryer.


I love it but you can't wash with soap and water like a normal person so I brought a tabo with me para sure wahaha.

5. In-room dining



The food we ordered is so good we got room service three times during our stay. Ibang level guys. I really enjoyed in-room dining because walking to the retail area can get really tiring considering how massive Okada is. 


We ordered Buffalo Wings and it came with pineapple slices. It's new but it works perfectly so I hereby declare this as my new favorite buffalo wings.



We also ordered Butter Chicken. We're big Indian food lovers so our eyes literally zoomed in at the sight of a familiar dish. After confirming that it's indeed Indian, we punched in our orders and waited excitedly! Butter Chicken is served with Naan and Biryani but when it came to us the bread is actually Roti, but no biggie. Grabe to ang sarap diiiin! RICH levels Makhanwala sya guys. 100% recommend.


Comes with assorted bread

Finally, another new favorite. This wet cement looking hodge podge is the best mushroom soup I've ever had I swear it tasted so rich and heavenly I might have gotten a high from this soup. What kind of mushroom is this? o_O

6. The Spaaaaa


Dear Lord I had the most amazing spa ever. Booked Bespoke Therapy in a couple's room for Jeckie and I and we had an extremely relaxing experience. We had a massive private suite just for the two of us with a steam shower, toilet, jacuzzi, and a spacious dressing area. The massage beds are unlike anything I've ever laid on. It's reclining, heated, and there's an entertainment tablet beneath the face hole. I don't know why anyone would use the tablets though. We mostly slept during the whole session. My husband was drooling haha and I was close to sleep talking. It was that heavenly.


There are other facilities you can enjoy in The Retreat Spa like the pool and lounge which is way better than the hotel pool to be honest haha but the water is shallow like 3ft lang.

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Yeah I guess that's it, despite a lot of waiting, I can say we still generally enjoyed our stay. Grateful for the experience!

Tips in consideration of the current restrictions in place:

✔ Get the Bay View room cos the Fountain is closed and the pool is empty. You can request this upon check-in. Sea view is better than city view for me plus you get to watch the sunset colors shimmering on the roof of Cove Manila! It's beautiful!
✔ Avoid the weekends cos it can get really crowded hehe
✔ Be patient!
✔ There are currently a limited number of guests allowed at the Coral Wing Pool, so you have to line-up before 8am to get ahead.
✔ Sign up for Rewards Circle membership (it's free!) at the Casino to get discount vouchers. We got 30% off vouchers on spa and dining upon signing up. Sadly we registered too late huhu
✔ Complimentary water is capped at 4 bottles per day. But according to front desk, there's unlimited water at the Casino hehe. Actually we ordered 8 more bottles but it didn't reflect in our statement so... thank you? Hehe


If you reached this part, thank you for bearing with me!

Friday, November 5, 2021

Everything hurts

I'm frustrated about a lot of things lately...

★ ATRAM / SeedBoxPH won't send my COP/COR emails

I didn't know ATRAM has a notoriously unreliable email notification system and it sucks that I have to message them every fucking time just to ask for my order confirmation. It's disappointing because I thought SeedBox PH has a better system than GInvest since it's linked to ATRAM (being their official digital investment platform) but heck at least GInvest provides more transaction information on the app. If only they had more products I wouldn't need to pull out from there.

★ Apple taking a while updating my pencil's purchase date

My request has been forwarded to two teams so far as they can't figure out what purchase date to use in my case.  The receipt I got shows the date in this format: MM/dd/YY and they can't decide whether I got the item on October 9 or September 10 lol. I'm perplexed that this is an issue and I wonder why they can't just take my word for it, which is October 9. If anything I don't care what they put as long I get my warranty, one month lang naman difference argh.

★ Can't decide on my leaves

I wanted to go on a week long vacation for my birthday but I know my remaining leave credits won't cover it. There were a couple of changes for my birthday celebration. I don't want to tell this blog cos I know it will jinx it lol just like it did the last time I mentioned it. So heck, not sharing anything specific so hopefully whatever bad juju this blog has can leave me alone.

★ Currently reading The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

Hopefully I get to finish the book by this month. I'm one book short of completing my Goodreads 2021 challenge, and this highly acclaimed novel is something I've been wanting to read for so long. I bought a physical copy years ago, and that is currently browning and foxing in a cart somewhere here. I'm reading on my Kindle now and I can't say I'm that enthralled by it. Anyway. 

★ Everything hurts

There's a gym that opened up at SM Light which has a badminton court. Despite the low ceiling, it's a delightful discovery for Jeckie and I as we've been hoping for a court to open up nearby. We've been casually cursing the Ethan Allen showroom everytime we pass by it in hopes it would go back to its previous form (a badminton court) lol, but that's just wishful thinking. One court with a low ceiling is good enough. Thank you Lord!

We played with a couple of friends yesterday and maaan was it a real workout! It's my first real workout since we went on a diet. My entire body hurts right now but I'm happy to report that my knee doesn't seem to be that traumatized anymore. I've been avoiding physical strain on my knees for more than a year now, even though I know I'm already fully healed. I learned that in order to regain normal functioning I have to move it like usual so it doesn't get stuck in a cautious state. Yikes. To be honest, I still can't step in the car the normal way because I'm afraid of twisting my knee, but I'll try hehe.

My waist, back, arms, thighs, and calves are terribly hurting right now. I didn't know playing badminton could be a full body workout. I was so dead beat last night that I almost slept through my entire shift. Shhhh

★ Need to work on my airfyer review

But really, I don't even know now. I need to cover a lot of things with our Philips airfyrer in order to make a valuable review but it's such a tedious thing to write and record haha. We'll see, we'll see, I need to get this out so I could work on my next review (my mechanical keyboard).

★ Still not on track with my work deliverables

I have KTs and UAT fixes that are long overdue. If this continues I'll be escalated and fired. Char. Hopefully not. Okay fine let's work.

Wednesday, October 27, 2021

Life Lately



Watch: Weekly Monotony (Oct 18-24 2021)


I had a pretty so-so week. Monday we applied for National ID cos they held an on-site registration at our condo. Love that we didn't have to go to a different venue and PhilSys is really working hard to get everyone registered. 

I woke up a bit early for this so I was groggy the whole time we're waiting in line. Good thing there were chairs. I fell asleep while seated and even dreamt that I was already finished with the registration. And then the staff directed me to the next station which is a PGH blood donation drive by the pool. I looked to my side and true enough there was a tent by the pool marked with PGH and the logo of Red Cross. Then I snapped out of it and realized I was dreaming haha. Good thing I don't sleep walk? What I thought was a white tent is actually a gazebo with brown roof tiles hahaha.

I have many hopes for this National ID system but I know it's gonna take a lot of time and effort to really see it bear fruit. It always frustrates me how scattered and inconsistent our data is across government offices. If they could setup a centralized portal where we could easily pull up and update our information that would be great. Then again, that's just wishful thinking for now. Baby steps, ika nga. Pero cha-cha lol. Hopefully we'll get there.

I've finished reading Verity by Coleen Hoover and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's my fastest read this year so that's new! You can read my thoughts about it here (along with another book): 
https://www.theblahger.com/2021/10/recently-love-hypothesis-and-verity.html  


I took a leave last Friday to accompany my husband to his passport renewal appointment at SM Aura. It's my first time driving there and I missed the exit that's supposed to lead us to the parking entrance by the side. But thank God for Waze, we were able to circle around McKinley Hill and back to SM Aura in time.

We also passed by the newly built Kalayaan bridge and while it's amazing how quickly we got transported from Pasig to BGC, the bottlenecks on Pasig side are godawful. I'm thankful we don't live along these main roads. It's been 1 year and 8 months that we're working from home and I always forget how dreadful commuting is over here. How come our lives aren't back to normal and yet traffic is?

I don't remember the last time I was at SM Aura. But I do remember when it was fairly new and had the vibes of an upscale mall. But now? It's like SM North EDSA Annex, an extension that's surprisingly too crowded for an area that supposedly gets less foot traffic lol. Definitely not upscale.


HR announced that we'll get our 13th month pay along with our salaries so I've also been obsessively refreshing my banking app that day. It didn't help that we usually get our salary days in advance which means Friday is already late for a Monday payout haha. Historically (and I keep tabs), if swelday falls on Monday it gets credited Thursday the week before. We've been spoiled.

Oh well, they did finally get to crediting it, albeit on time, much to my dismay HAHAHA. And just like that the excitement's dead. Especially after looking at my withholding tax. Hay.

I don't have much planned for my 13th month pay so most of it went to ATRAM global funds. I've been maintaining my global UITF portfolio ever since I learned it earns at least 20% pa. I thought it was too good to be true, specially when our local stock market can't even maintain a 6% pa growth. But heck it only shows how fucked up the Philippine economy is. I opened a SeedBox PH account and pulled out my funds from GInvest to focus on just one platform. SeedBox has more products available. So yeah, hopefully it grows. This is what excites me now haha.

I still don't know what to do for my birthday. It's the one day I'm allowed to enjoy myself and let everyone know so it's gotta be grand right? Hahahah charot. It's the only day in a year I could justify telling my boss to give me a break lol (not that he wouldn't on a different day, my boss is cool). But now that everyone's learned to be more assertive of their personal time (ie. selfish char), I suddenly don't know how to make it more special. Personally I just want to buy myself an Apple Pencil, eat good sushi, watch a movie, and get a full body massage.

Ah this has gone too lengthy, but finally, I'd like to ponder on this verse I placed at the end of my vlog:


"Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."
Proverbs 19:21

Oftentimes we get too caught up planning our lives, leaving God's will out of the equation. Only when everything falls (and it does) do we scramble back to him and let him take over. Somehow surrendering is easier when you have nothing to lose. Isn't it insulting that we've placed God as a contingency plan instead of following his lead? Why do we take his mercy and forgiveness for granted?

To be honest, I still struggle a lot with letting God lead my life completely, specially on abundant seasons. But I just realized how there's an immeasurable peace that comes with full surrender, specially to the maximally great being that is God.

So yeah, let's not forget to put God first, as in truly first. I noticed that our society is past putting money on the top of our priorities after realizing it's not a real measure of success. Now it's turned to a more dangerous idol, our selves (and k-pop char). As for Christians, may our success be based on our obedience to God and his will, after all we are his creations and we serve his purpose. Only his judgment matters.

Saturday, October 23, 2021

Recently: The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood and Verity by Coleen Hoover

I remember a time in my life when every time I finish a book I'm always excited to blog. Not about the book, but about my life, sometimes feeling the author's style has rubbed on me that I'm suddenly in such a great mood to write, even about the smallest things. But that's gone. I don't think I'm that girl anymore, I have grown out of it, the urge to write crushed down by more pressing things. Like work.

But hey, let's bring it back. I just recently finished two books and I didn't hate them, which means you're probably not gonna hear about it hahaha. If you noticed, I find it easier to complain about things I hate than to commend things that I love. Maybe hatred is something that converts easier into words? And love is something you usually wanna keep to yourself? Either way, I loved these two, so I have no words. But here I am...

So instead, let's nitpick. 

But first, even though this should go without saying... SPOILER ALERT.

What do I hate about Ali Hazelwood's The Love Hypothesis?

Ah, the fact that Olive thinks Adam is so tall and big when she herself is 5'8". Idk maybe 6'4" will always look huge to anyone looking.

Ahn's doting is so unrealistic

How Olive didn't realize that Tom had expressed interest in her project before rumors broke out about her and Adam, therefore contradicting every vile thing he said to her after the talk. I was waiting for her to somehow realize it but nah. Unless of course Tom knew of her way back because Adam has told his friends about an Olive Smith.


Next, what do I hate about Coleen Hoover's Verity?



This is a highly rated, much recommended book on Kindle PH group, and based on people's reactions I already prepared myself for a mind blowing ride. While it did not disappoint, I wasn't too convinced about the ending.

I liked psycho Verity's character. Her autobiography painting herself as a contemptuous mother, filled with dark and disturbing thoughts of killing her children and keeping her husband all for herself, what a horrifying read! It's all too good that I can't accept none of it is real haha (or not since the book was Open Ended [nice callback to Lowen's book btw]).

I guess I kinda saw there was a twist in that manuscript, I just didn't like how it was revealed. Everything was exposed in a letter hidden under the floorboards of her bed. A written explainer. What a bore. I was half hoping they'd discover the truth behind it from Amanda, who suggested the writing exercise herself. That way "antagonistic journaling" wouldn't sound like a silly alibi. Oh well.


That's it!


Since I'm nitpicking, you know it's not a big deal right? I'm just looking for ways to be annoyed. I'm way past those points and would recommend this book to anyone who wants to end their reading slump and catch up on their GoodReads 2021 Reading Challenge. Thanks to CoHo I'm on track. I'm excited to read another one of hers!

Wednesday, October 6, 2021

My thoughts on The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue

Finally completed reading The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab. My rating? 3 over 5.


I found this book getting recommended a lot at Kindle Philippines fb group so I thought I'd give it a try after finishing Hopeless by Coleen Hoover (which I rated 4/5). Didn't think it would take me 3 months to finish it. I'm a slow and uninspired reader, and even by my standards 3 months is too long for a single book hahaha. It was so dragging.

SPOILER ALERT

Here's the summary from GoodReads...

A Life No One Will Remember. A Story You Will Never Forget.

France, 1714: in a moment of desperation, a young woman makes a Faustian bargain to live forever and is cursed to be forgotten by everyone she meets.

Thus begins the extraordinary life of Addie LaRue, and a dazzling adventure that will play out across centuries and continents, across history and art, as a young woman learns how far she will go to leave her mark on the world.

But everything changes when, after nearly 300 years, Addie stumbles across a young man in a hidden bookstore and he remembers her name.

---

Interesting right? My favorite part about the book is really the writing style, beautiful prose poetry that vividly takes you wherever Addie is. I loved the time jumps between past and present, her relationship with her father, her child-like wonder whenever they head out of town, her frustration about getting stuck at their village forever, and her friendship with Estelle, who's probably my favorite character in this book.

But whenever it jumps to the present, I always lose interest. 

There are three main characters in this story; Addie our 300 year old heroine, Luc the god he struck a deal with, and Henry... Addie's special sadboi lol.

None of them had any character development throughout the story. To think Addie has lived 300 years, she didn't seem to have wisened up. The only thing special about her is her unorthodox distaste for being a homemaker and staying in Villon forever. But beyond that? We see nothing more, she's just loitering around, I wouldn't say the world but, Europe and America, looking for affluent artists who could draw her like one their French girls, char.

Perhaps it's a consequence of having lived three centuries. At a hundred she's learned enough to survive the world despite her curse. Another hundred and the weight of losing loved ones has taken a toll on her psyche. Another hundred and she's desensitized to loss and being forgotten, as it becomes a recurring theme in her god-knows-how-long life. Maybe that's why it seemed like she's not grown enough. Maybe this book should've ended when she's around 200.

Given Addie, it's hard for me to imagine how she found some kind of favor in Luc's eyes. As a god who answers in the dark, I had high expectations of his might. But he's just all flair. Their snide banters aren't even that clever. For a god who's in the business of souls, he probably a low ranked grim reaper who's more concerned about looking cool.

And don't get me started on Henry. He's an empty shell. Before and during the deal. There's nothing special about him. He exists solely to write about Addie, which consequently gave him the recognition he's yearned for so long, so yeah, good for him. Not for the readers though.

I don't know. I feel like the premise was wasted in trying to establish a love-hate relationship between Addie and Luc. I probably had wrong expectations. I wanted to revel in the sinister nature of Faustian bargains, much like in the TV series Once Upon a Time, because the writing style could very much pull off such vividry, but I guess it's too much to ask of someone who just goes with the flow, an undaunting villain, and a weak male character (Addie, Luc, and Henry respectively).

Thursday, September 30, 2021

Motivational BS

I attended a seminar our company set about building resilience in these trying times. I believe it's the second time they organized something like this, so almost the same topic, just with a new speaker. Someone old and big in the BPO industry, employee #000001 in Convergy's I heard. Someone who has written a motivational book, of course haha. Such hype. Much wow. She was even introduced twice! First by Jack Canfield, creator of Chicken Soup for the Soul (wow!), through a video recording, and next by our very own country director.  Who the heck gets introduced twice in a speaking engagement right? Gotta be someone so good. So our director said a lot of great things about her, being an institution in the call center industry and all, how his dad is such a fan they even had coffee one time, yadda yadda yadda. Anyways, within the first ten minutes of the session my expectations rose from 0-100%. I was so excited to listen to her.


Only to be disappointed.

So she made us do an excercise to illustrate the power of the mind. She said to put our hands in a prayer position, making sure to align the lines at our wrist as a guide. Then she asked us which of our middle fingers appear shorter. And to the hand containing the shorter middle finger, she told us to talk to it, yep, and say "Grow longer" 8 times. Oh boy. She's not joking. She asked everybody to turn on their cameras and we all have to fkn talk to the hand live at the same time. Of course I didn't oblige with the video. After chanting we were asked to put our hands back to prayer position, possibly so we could ask God why we're being taken as idiots, and observe how the finger has actually grown. Wow.


Needless to say, some were conned into believing their middle finger actually grew longer. Magic! The power of the mind! And it doesn't end there. It's silly, I know. I was waiting for her to take it back and say of course I'm joking you dummies. But man, there's a 2nd part to the act. Now to the middle finger that has grown foolishly in your eyes, you have to say "Back to normal" 8 times. And it will be back when you put your hands in prayer. Right. Prayer is the key.

It know it's a ridiculous exercise, some of use were laughing. I was waiting for her to take it back, you know, in case some people actually take her seriously. But you know what she said to the naysayers? TRY AGAIN. Keep talking to it. Wtf. She ain't joking. Apparently you can now grow your finger just by telling it to frkn grow up. Eight times for maximum effect, and in prayer position for some divine intervention. What can I say, my mom has tried that on me a hundred times in my childhood, and here I am, just grown but not grown up. Safe to say it doesn't work.

That's it. That really put me off. Idk if it's a bad joke, but she never took it back, or somehow expressed that she's joking. There's gotta be other ways to teach placebo without messing with your anatomy.

Well it's not all bad. I actually got my shorter middle finger to be taller for a while. I guess because I put the rest down.

ui ipad mini 6 hahaha

iPad Mini 6


I love it! I knew it's only a matter of time before the mini conforms to its bigger siblings. Been waiting for Apple Pencil 2 support and it's finally here! So now the iPad Mini looks like the pros, gone with the touch ID button at the front and in with the all-screen design,. Other notable upgrades would be 5G support, 128GB starting storage, aaaand touch ID integrated into the top button -- super cool.

Will I upgrade though? Of course not. I barely even use my iPad mini nowadays, its only purpose would be for Procreate and following workout videos. It's just nice to know that the features I want are already available... for whenever I decide to upgrade hahaha.

Thursday, September 16, 2021

fully vaxxed at last

Before I begin drowning in work, again, quick update:


We just got fully vaccinated over the weekend. Thank you Lord! We got our 2nd jab of Moderna on Saturday, which we prepared for by taking a leave the day before to do errands. Good call though cos Jeckie and I were both knocked down the whole weekend right after the shot. Fever, headaches, body pain, and the usual heaviness on the arm. I had 38deg fevers. My husband had chills, which he kinda enjoyed cos his rattling jaw feels funny daw haha. We had very little strength to do anything productive, we ordered from GrabFood the whole time and watched the days go by, mostly confused at why I'm rolling up the blinds at night and eating breakfast at 3am. It was crazy. My body clock was kinda lost.

But now I'm feeling better. Definitely better. Except for work. Argh.

Backtrack. We got our first dose Aug 12 at Robison's Forum after seeking help from a neighbor to submit our Mandavax registration to the Brgy Hall.

It was very very frustrating having to get a schedule. As early as March we were already preregistered online, but now that it's our turn to get inoculated, we were told we have to submit our papers again and personally pa at the city hall! The fudge was ONLINE preregistration for? I'm so mad at the system but I know it's a waste of energy to dwell on it.

So we sought help from one of our neighbors to submit our registration confirmation on our behalf. We paid for printing and delivery tapos a few days later biglang our condo admin also offered the same service. Lol sayang. Anyway.


This country sucks. So much red tape, glaring corruption, ineffient processes, and a hell lot more. How do I leave.

K back to work. Urgh I hate this.

Friday, September 3, 2021

What's up in bullets

✱ Work. Hay. I'm feeling super duper tired from work. There's just too many things to do and they're piling up uncontrollably on my lap! I can't seem to be able to finish a project lately and it feels bad. Well, I haven't been feeling so good about work lately and it's already feedback season haaay. :(

✱ Three weeks ago my dad and sister tested positive for covid so they had to quarantine themselves. My parents are both fully vaccinated already but my sister hasn't had a single shot yet. Thank God it's only mild. My dad experienced fever, cough, colds, loss of taste and smell. My sister had the same symptoms plus rashes which made everyone panic. The doctor said the rashes are possibly an immune response and should go away as they go on with the treatment. And it sure did. Now they're doing okay. My sister is back to work (wfh) but they're still not listed as fully recovered. 

A bunch of things that made me happy lately


✱ This black silicon Kindle case I got form Lazada. It took 10 days to get delivered but it's worth it cos it's so cute specially with my latte popsocket on!


✱ Our airfryer! My husband gifted me an airfryer and I'm loving it! Thought it would be helpful for eating healthy but as it turns I'm cooking a lot more now cos it's more convenient, plus I can bake now too so there goes the mandatory muffin and cakes being added to our "healthy" diet haha. 


I'll probably do a Youtube review someday, when I've gotten the hang of it. I already have a bunch of cons to discuss but ultimately it's been great cooking with this! 

✱ Milk Lab. I've been seeing this a lot on socmed and CHB. They say it's the best milk for your coffee. You know I only take my coffee black so I never really considered this. Until I bought a kilo of coffee that didn't taste good in plain black. I thought adding milk could save it so at least I gotta get the best out there haha. Actually I just needed an excuse to try it. So yun.


Well, the hype is real! It really tastes good. It froths well, unlike other milk brands that are too bubbly and not foamy. This one tastes divine. It's really good for coffee. But as a plain cold full cream milk? There are better options (ie. Pure & Best!) hehe.


It's pricey though and you can only order online. It's ₱234 in 3's plus shipping so it comes out at around ₱90/L. Grand Nourriture is the official distributor and they ship really fast. 

Anyway. This is a very happy discovery for me but the phase didn't last, hindi sustainable for me haha. Ang gastos maadik sa Milk Lab no eh automatic drip coffee maker lang meron ako. Hassle pa magprepare I have to warm the milk then froth. If I want another cup, same procedure. It's time consuming haha. But the drink is super good so it's kindof worth it. Specially with drizzled caramel sauce from Torani! Aaaaahh

I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to go back to enjoying black coffee after being blown away by such good homemade latte, but I when I made myself a cup of black this morning... aaaahh, iba parin yung feeling, yung aroma, hindi indulgent, lasang lasa mo yung kape. It's all in the grounds talaga. So I'll most probably give away whatever's left of the bad batch I got and go back to drinking plain black coffee, specifically Basilio's Muni-muni blend hehe.

✱ Yeah I guess that's it. Ah! I got dual monitors now at home thanks to our local IT who sent in my docking station. Just in time for this testing project I have that requires multiple monitors haha yeyy?

✱ Haaay Lord. Hope everything will be okay. I want to take a good long break, it's already our anniversary month and with MECQ persisting, we can't go to Baguio na huhu.

Anyways! Stay safe everyone! :D

Tuesday, August 3, 2021

Life Lately

Heya. Thought I'd write something before my mind gets scrambled even more today. I have so much going on at work and I'm feeling very very overwhelmed. Sometimes I wanna blame myself for procrastinating too much, but at this point I have no other choice but to hammer on. If only I could put a stopper on any new tasks until I've finished everything that's on my plate right now. That would be awesome. But oh well. 


✱ Reading
I'm around 30% with The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and finally, finally, it's starting to pick up.


✱ Watching
Naruto with my husband and The Circle on my downtime.


✱ Listening
To nothing.


✱ Thinking
About how saddening it is that we now celebrate our selves more than we celebrate God's goodness in our lives. I'm appalled at the rate at which our society is turning more and more individualistic, putting one's self above everything else. It's a sneaky way to slowly remove God in our society.

It all sounds so good... loving yourself, taking care of your body, accepting your flaws, prioritizing your mental health, etc. etc. and they're all valid. But without the intention of honoring God, it's all self-serving and the happiness it brings can only be fleeting. You become tied in an endless pursuit of self-gratificaton, until you realize that it's useless pursuing things in this world. Material posessions, validation from others, nothing matters when you die. Things get lost, memories are forgotten. I always remind myself not to get too caught up in this world, and it's a daily struggle. And that's why we pray.


✱ Smelling
Nothing.


✱ Wishing

To get vaccinated already. Whatever brand. Even though I prefer Pfizer or Moderna, I can't be choosy now when the virus is mutating faster than the rate at which we're being inoculated.


I've re-registered at MandaVax...
Also registered at Makati under A4 category...
I'm also waiting for a schedule with my husband's company... 
And patiently awaiting for our own company as well.. if they even have plans on jabbing us.

So much for going back to the new office. I really wanna start working there because this girl needs her dual monitor setup so so badly. Like hell I'm about to embark on a project that requires multiple screens. I'm bad at multitasking but multiple monitors make me seem like one hahaha please Lord pleeeaase


✱ Wearing
My regular wfh garb which is v-neck shirt and relaco shorts from Uniqlo. 


✱ Loving


My new office chair. I got the one in the middle - in black. It's ErgoHome's Ventus Midback chair. My wish is really my command haha. Thank you Lord at least now I can sit at the proper height without the armrests hitting the table hehe.


✱ Wanting


For everything to be back to normal na but that's a reach no? At least bring back restaurant dine-in haha. Jeckie was upset we couldn't eat outside during the weekend so we cooked steak at home na lang. Ang gastos namin sa food lol.


✱ Needing

To manage my projects and time more efficiently. It seems like I'm always drowning in work. Gusto ko na sumuko argh. Tapos may sisingit na mandatories on how to communicate with impact, manage your priorities, and be a good leader in general blah blah blah. Ironic how it's exactly what I need to learn right now but hindi ko sya priority cos I'm hella swamped. Hahahuhu #PaanoNa


✱ Feeling
So freaking tired from work. Please pray for my sanity.

Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Hala sya

What the heck, I forgot I was supposed to attend this Communicating with Impact workshop my boss signed me up for. To be honest, I really forgot about it. It didn't help that I may have accidentally ignored the calendar reminder because uhm, force of habit. Anyway, it's a frkn 4-hour class with lots of succeeding sessions and tons of pre-work. Sa totoo lang it's too much work for me right now cos I'm already drowning in work tapos may mga "extra-curricular" pa lol. Nahiya naman ako sa boss ko. I even uploaded a new profile pic on facebook and he frigging 👍 it tapos biglang hindi ako umattend sa meeting. Busy ba talaga ko.

Hay Lord, when the hell is this gonna end. Pwede bang magpa-demote na lang lol unless this is really how it's gonna be for the rest of the year so might as well get paid more for it lol. #ThisTooShallPass


Earlier this afternoon I went to LTO to have my driver's license updated to my current address. I've been postponing this for the longest time but I need a valid ID with my correct address asap so I could get vaccinated in my LGU. In fairness to LTO Pasig, it's my second time transacting with them this year and I really love how quick and easy it is to do my business there. Siguro kasi it was mostly online, from scheduling, to uploading of revelant docs, and to payment. I only had to go there to have my license reprinted. They were even expecting me while I was lost looking for the right window. Galing hehe.

After that errand, I went to get some new specs at Owndays. My current glasses are already 2 years old, not sure if it's already due for an update but it's become quite uncomfortable to wear recently. So yun. In fairness to Owndays, 20 mins and I'm out. I got a new frame with blue light filter, and it looks great.


Here's a selfie! It fits better and doesn't fall down, considering I got one without adjustable nose pads. It's cool. My eye grade increased a bit I think. And I'm having a really bad headache right now. Baka naga-adjust pa. Everything's clearer and mejo nakakahilo panning around. Hope I get used to it soon. I just worry cos I don't remember getting a headache with my first glasses but ganon huhu.

In other news, kuya Rey from TSP asked me if I'm still okay working for Super Labandera cos they're planning to reprint it next year under a different publisher. I'm all for it! Buti na lang the timeline isn't too tight so I still have time to improve my skills. Sana gumaling ako kasi nahihiya ako dun sa una kong gawa hehe. I'm pretty excited!

Also, I got my first sale from Redbubble. I already forgot I had some merch up in there haha. I got 10 cents from a sticker sale hahaha yeyy?

Hay Lord I want to rest. I don't know how to deal with my workload. It's too much. Kanina lang I got a call for two new projects, right when I haven't cleared up my to do list. Nakakalula na andaming kelangan gawin tapos ang sakit pa ng ulo ko huhu. Here's what's on my plate:

Robot for documents exclusion
Robot for CRM cleanup
Robot for proforma generation
Robot for new matters

And just now, a new task came along. I'm gonna be doing another Desktop Regression test using Eggplant na sobrang limot ko na juskopo tapos kelangan ko pa isetup yung license aaaarrgghh.

I'm so so so so tired. 

When will it get better.

Please pray for my sanity. 🙏

Thursday, July 22, 2021

Life lately

✱ Reading

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue 
I'm 17% in and loving it so far. The writing is very captivating, poetic almost, and has an otherworldly charm to it. I'm excited it to know how Addie's life unfolds with everything she's been through in the first few chapters of the book.

✱ Watching

Jeckie and I are rewatching Naruto on Netflix and my is it such a good anime! I remember watching this when I was younger but I couldn't remember the story (as usual). Now that I'm older, mas na-enjoy ko sya in fairness. Maybe because I'm more engaged with the story now than I was when I was a kid who was more hooked on its entertainment value.

✱ Listening 

To some Rainy Jazz playlist on Spotify :)

✱ Thinking

About highschool and how much I hated it hahaha.

Once in a while I get reminded of how much I hated highschool. This is one of those times. A group chat was created, I don't know, maybe out of nostalgia, and slowly people started getting added to the room. Some went to say hi, some went to say where in the world they are (which is not the Philippines), some went to share what they do for a living, some uploaded their kid's photos, some left immediately (respect), some went to apologize (I'm curious if it matters to those they actually bullied), and some stayed in silence just to lurk, waiting for drama lol (me). Well it didn't come, not a week later and the group chat is already silent. Guess people really didn't have much to say beyond ~hi hello sorry if I've hurt anyone before blah blah blah~, at least to the whole batch. I mean for sure we continued gossiping within our own circle of friends. I'm sure some of us are still waiting for an apology. And I'm also sure there's no need to remember highschool. 

Wow this bitch is so angry, who hurt you? Hahaha

I never liked highschool for the most part. My best take away from that bloody phase would be knowing who my real friends are, other than that, there's really nothing to look back to. I know who to keep as friends and who to avoid forever, and I intend to keep it that way.

I don't even care much about reunions cos honestly, what the hell do you do there anyway? You're just gonna end up talking to your own friends. So why bother. We already have a group chat for that haha. It's not like we're up for some kind of rekindling. It's not like we're in need of reconciliation. I didn't think we're a tight-knit batch anyway.

It's not all bad though. And I know it feels unfair to pass judgment to the whole batch when it's really just just one person, and her group of friends, who made an entire year miserable for me. I have not forgiven her, and I doubt she even remembers terrorizing me, and many others for that matter. Half the girls in my batch are mean, and to have the meanest bunch on your back for a whole year is traumatizing. Urgh. 

Anyway. I'll forget about it. Til someone gets nostalgic again haha.  


✱ Smelling

Nothing much.

✱ Wishing

For a better office chair wow hahaha. I'm just learning to enjoy sitting properly while working and in my case it involves setting the seat height to the highest level (short people problems). And because my chair doesn't have adjustable armrests they keep bumping on the edge of the table huhu hassle. I'm looking at this chair from ErgoHome hehe but I would need to sell my O2 Midback first to give space for this haha



✱ Wearing

Sando and shorts hehe

✱ Loving

My time off from Twitter. I left Twitter a week ago to uhm detox cos it's become a very toxic place to lurk in haha. Everyone is too performative and I feel like it's a whole world filled with pseudo-intellectuals you can't argue with. I actually just logged out and hid the app from my home screen, but thankfully I haven't given in to the urge of launching the app every now and then, specially when I want to air out some micro thoughts once in a while. I've gotten better at suppressing my thoughts, specially when I know I can introspect some more and validate it further. Cos I know I'm not always right, and I'd rather have a few informed opinions than have an opinion on everything. Twitter has made it too easy to share stupid thoughts, I'm guilty of it too. So I wanna hold back. It's a good exercise. Thinking before posting, then eventually forgetting hehe.

✱ Wanting

A sleeping mask. Can't decide if I'll get Tempur again or try other weighted ones. I'm curious about weighted sleep masks but I also want to be able to open my eyes fully. I think right now I just want something blackout and comfy.

✱ Needing

To stop stress twirling my hair but I just can't? My mind is too weak for this. My scalp hurts, my arm hurts, and araw-araw para akong bagong gupit with all the bits of my hair getting cut off. Hay.

✱ Feeling

Hopeful about the things to come. We have a lot of new team members, coming from another department that's been merged with ours. Can't wait to get to know them, but somehow I also feel uneasy about the change lol. But whatever, I'm sure it can only be good.

Our country director has announced that they'll be allowing people to come to the office starting September but no definite guidelines have been rolled out yet. I think the firm is hesitant to put out a rule not allowing unvaccinated people in the office because it could come off as discriminatory (well, it is) but I think it's perfectly fair to do so, specially in these times. It's for the good of everyone. I wouldn't want to report to work unvaccinated. And if not everyone in the office gets vaccinated, what's the point in risking exposure. I'm much safer at home. Hay.

Well, best case scenario for me is to be allowed remote work forever haha but that's reaching for the stars so nevermind.