A very personal blog

Day 4: the meaning behind your blogger name

the lack of communication really pisses me off big time! i hate having to wait for someone who doesn’t even care how long i’ve waited, or if i’m still waiting like shit. i hate waiting for someone who is so damn insensitive not to even check me out after 1 fucking hour of leaving me. no phone? who cares. i’m like what, 20 steps away? that shit can’t even drop by and say hey i’m in a fuckin glitch so ya have to wait longer. nothing? not even a friggin popcorn? fucking date. waste of my freaking precious time. i do stupid things when i’m angry so when shit got back i was like, “i’m leaving.” then i stomped away to the opposite direction. enraged but tryin to keep it together. i was in a super angry mood, the 2 sales hoes who came to me with “hi, pwede magtanong?” i replied with a flat out, “hinde.” i could’ve answered longer with “hinde. wala akong credit card” but i’m not about to waste my words. i’m so freaking maaaaadddd. >:| until now! fuuuuuuck.

here’s another rant. i’m kind of being fed up with people who are so fucking self absorbed. friends included. i know i know. i must tolerate shit like this. they’re my friends. i have to be nice even if i’m sinning inside. pagbigyan sige pagbigyan. they think they’re too important that every whisper is about them. every guy likes them. and every girl is insecure. the fuck bitch. the fuck. why can’t you get over your freaking self and stop indirectly fishing for compliments. thing is, everything i hear is so friggin ohkaaay, so what?! significance please? there’s not much sense left in the world anymore. i know i’m not making sense but comeon i’m just tired of having to put up with people who assume too much and talk too friggin much about themselves. parang, yeah big deal much? so fucking whaaaaat?! i understand sige, it’s okay, it’s so freakin okay to be flattered by the SMAAAAAAAALLLEST things. like when tambays call on you on the street. when someone offers to carry your things. when someone opens the door for you. yfeel important of course. when someone confesses to you, yesss  shempre you’re the most beautiful creature on earth!

it’s cool. it’s really cool. but those ain’t bragging rights! every tambay would whistle to every girl who walks on the corner. a common gentleman would open the door to anyone, senior citizens included. a naturally nice guy would offer to carry your baggage if it was really heavy duuuhh and while confessions bolster up egos so friggin much, it’s not worth the brag. like fuck yeah. it’s not like i don’t care about the smallest things people do, but yknooow i believe people are born nice! it’s like a default predisposition. everything they do nice, is not just for you. you are not that special. everyone is nice! yun lang yun. hindi lang sayo kaya wag lalaki ulo por faborrrrrr.

siguro nga in a different perspective, they’re the better bitches. they appreciate every fucking piece of attention given to them. they notice everything that they think has something to do with them. oh why, am i not the same? of course! i’m a bitch too and i’m a terrible assumer. i overthink and overanalyze things to the point of damnation. the only difference is, i never confirm any of my assumptions. let alone bring them up.

i just hate this daaaaay so friggin much. the anger is still in my chest (seryofuckingso!) for waiting for the bastard for one frakkkkin hour. where’s my patience? no, where is the shit’s politesse!??! and i thought you were tryna make it up to me?! shit man you wasted it.

excuse me, i can wait for hours! as long i know i have to. don’t keep me guessing how long i should sit here and rot cos i’m definitely leaving. man you can just tell me, hey this is gonna take 15 minutes. and if it’s taking longer, you can go back and tell me, 15 minutes more. and so on and blah. if that was case, i could’ve waited patiently KNOWING THAT SOMEONE VALUES MY FREAKING TIME. cos my time is GOLD. grrrrr

my goodnesssssssss.

PS: when i was in elbi i was adviced that it’s healthy to confirm your assumptions, once in a awhile, specially the strong ones cos you’ll never know how reliable your instincts are. (after all by virtue of the scientific method, hypotheses are to be tested out). my problem is, i did that once and i kinda lost a friend. i lost another friend when i did it twice! i keep losing my favorite dudes (uhm and a dudette errr) yknow.

do you even know what i’m talking about?
i don’t! HAHA