what now?

there's the guilt. i'm planning on doing something kindof mean, i just couldn't bring myself to do it because i don't want to seem sarcastic. i'm sure there's still something worth saving in this friendship, but i can't fix it right now because i haven't recovered from the pain yet. which was, of course, self-inflicted and was all brought by virtue of being extremely curious, possessive, narrow minded, judgmental and in love.

i can't be sure if i did what's best, but ever since i did it, i hasn't plagued me that much. this is probably one of the few times i contemplate about it, about that action. i don't ever regret doing that. except that i wish there was a complete information blackout about you for me. i don't want to hear anything. i don't want to know anything more. i shut you off first, and it was choice i made to save myself. albeit being selfish, that's how i deal. and i'm not missing you.

BTW. the 08s are exiting the school in a few weeks, so wtf but i sorta have to get a replacement for JM. and i just did! i'm calling him Tenjo for no reason at all. he's good looking, smart and ftr, he wears glasses. >8D enough to pull a heartstring! >:D ok! akin na toooo!!! mygaaahhd age doesn't matter now, does it? i'm losing it, call 163 for me. >XD

ok, i have a plan. i have to get in his class next tri! someone get me the accounting curriculum LOOOOL

school is no fun without crushes!