perhaps

i have no right to say i was deprived of the chance to go out and explore during my highschool days just because i'm so stuck inside the unimplemented but felt stereotype present during those damned years. last night, because i can't lull myself to sleep listening to my mp3 player, i browsed through our yearbook... actually reading my batchmates' profile write-ups.

then i realized... oh she likes to draw? put she's a pep squad member! and hey, she's quite artistic for a jock.

so you see, all of us in the batch are 'victims' of sort, of the huge influence our designated stereotype imposes. it's not like i didn't enjoy being part of the geek squad or the teenage mutant ninja turtles (yknow, artists)... actually, it's the best thing that happened to me. i met my barkada, and as they say birds of the same feather (make a good feather duster!!! - quote rufa mae quinto hahaha) flock together. it can't be helped that you are being grouped based on your dominant traits because really, that's just how it is.

it's a natural phenomenon to have a whole mob of highschool students grouped into whatever it is that binds him/her with her close friends.

but it is also important not to treat it as a barrier. it is merely a distinguishing factor which sometimes gets exagerrated to the point of limiting the student within specific bounds. just because she's a geek doesn't mean she can't do an aerial flip.

well guys, i don't even know why i bother with this. it's just that sometimes i think i didn't gave my best when i was in higschool, i didn't use my potentials to the core. i just drew and drew for myself and for the club... and even when i wanted to sing i just didn't have enough confidence to back my fidgeting limbs.

so now it's the issue of confidence.

ugggh, this might get longer yknow. haha hafta stop!

wait, i'm kinda pissed off right now because i'm supposed to download Dead Fantasy but the site's undergoing some maintainance which i gather they do everyday, at this hour... it happened yesterday and i waited till the next day to be able to download it but since it's 100MB and the downloading speed is at max 4kbps, everytime i disconnect (which isn't in my will, someone always always has to use the phone), whatever chunk of file i've downloaded gets erased and i have to restart with the shit.

i hate it, really.
i want to have a copy of it because i got hooked when coach gave us a preview of it in high def. man, it's crazy, even i who isn't a final fanatasy or dead or alive fan am enjoying it!

a must watch. definitely.