a happy new year to everyone!

yeah it'll be 2008 in exactly 4 hours.

honestly, i think time flew by so fast. i could still clearly recall what happened last new year's eve. per usual i spent it with my family, here in our house, at the rooftop... without any fireworks whatsoever... it has been a tradition for us not to purchase anything that will be displayed in the sky although it's quite a sad thing because i could just imagine us throwing fireworks on the rooftop!!! everyones' eyes would be on our house! on that spot where the highest fireworks are sparkling at the midnight sky. it would be a most pleasant view. too bad...

but then again, showing off fireworks on our rooftop is just the second best thing we could enjoy this eve... the first and best would still be the fact that we have the best view in the whole subdivision when it comes to the night sky! i could go stargazing everyday (provided it isn't raining/cloudy)! and yeah, we could watch the fireworks without the annoying cables and electric posts... and trees too.

i'm not really fond of doing resolutions y'know... i'm more a wishlist type of girl. hahaha and later, my sister and i agreed to create a new 101 wishlist before midnight then we'll pray it over with our family.

it's all about getting closer to God now.

i missed talking to him. i can't believe how far i've drawn myself away from him over the past year. maybe that's why i've been trekking a downhill path ever since i entered college, ever since i let the academic pressure take over my dire life. i thought my being a warrior last last summer, my life of everyday prayer, is enough to arm me throughout my life in los banos. i thought that when you prayed a lot tonight, it will bring you enough blessings to last you for a week.

i thought i could just easily pass on a prayer and still be blessed for a week or so.
but the truth is, i have always been blessed, even during the times i don't pray. He is so generous about blessings that i guess one of the advantages of praying is that it gives us more appreciation to the blessings He has bestowed upon us.

prayer arms us with an extraordinary kind of perspective that let's you see only the good things in the world. without it, all the blessings that has always been there for you will be masked for hiding. and you'll think that all that there is in this world is a pile of misfortune and an unbearable amount of mischief and poverty.

whew. it was never a smooth year for us... i mean, every year isn't as smooth as what we prayed it to be. but it's damn unforgiveable if we stop praying with just that. hah. >_>

okok, i'll pray. it's so hard to bring back my childhood motivation about praying. back then i used to pray out loud because that's how my parents taught me and that's how we do it in sunday school. but now, huhuhuhu, i can't even sit straight in prayer without sleeping. everytime i do an indian sit on the prayer room and clasp my hands in prayer, i always end up sticking it on my forehead for support, then goes the obvious... zzzzz.

>___>

here goes another wishlist!

# a set of multicolored pens from steadtler. i guess a set would cost around 600-700php. hehehe
# new rubber shoes. haha always in my wishlist!
# money would still be #1
# a few cute earrings and lots of pakaw. haha
# multicolored metallic pens.
# markers, multicolored too. hehehe
# bond papers
# lots of oslo paper

haha, i'm asking for a lot of art materials.
oh, an immaterial wish would be

# to transfer to upd fine arts next AY.
whew. rakenrol!

Fuego!

it's Rizal day!
but more importantly (yeah, i guess so because i don't really have that much patriotism in me to go on a pilgrimage this day) it's my wuvies Martha and Carla's Birthday!!! yeah beybeh!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATHA AND CARLA!!!!! ♥

oh, i'm so sorry for putting our national hero aside but we don't usually celebrate this day like other traditionalists do... at least i know what this day is worth... :)

i still admire you Rizal. i just hope it goes about changing the Philippines that way.

change topic my friends! you see, i love my country but at present i think i'm still more of a liability than an asset! wait till i get a job and perhaps that's when i can seriously prioritize some of my socio-economic plans to help our nation! bwahaha

i watched kid nation awhile ago and was caught by Alex! he's so cute! and he won a Gold Star! yeah!! :D

hope he wins!

oh, it's almost new year

to tell you honestly, i'm bored.

the last christmas party i attended was back with my dormmates (the 19th, if i could remember correctly)... if you'd still like to count the org party then sure, but since it's just on the same day and all i ever did there was drink and play cards.... fine, i'll include that.

but it doesn't change this... err... loneliness that i feel. not exactly lonely like emo-lonely, it's more like the lack of parties attended this season that made me feel bad.

i'm not really a party-girl, heck i just want to be around the people i love (luuuuurve) this season and this pretty blasted sickness robbed me of that opportunity. i was supposed to go partying with my friends last wednesday, it's a xmas-slash-carla-and-martha's birthday party all rolled into one event. i cannot afford not to attend that. then again, i just got discharged from the hospital and it's not adviseable to go wasting my life for the nth time.

am i really wasting myself partying?
oh, best answer would be NO. it's not like i do it everyday. hahaha, the season just calls for it! big DUH. christmas is spelled party backwards... including new year!!

I WANT GIFTS!!! huhuhuhu

new year new year, according to feng shui, the year of the Rat will be full of misfortunes for people born under the Horse!!! wenkwenk.

the least i could do is ignore it...
and perhaps purchase a relatively strong lucky charm... err..

i'm chatting to vrey right now. all about shifting... hmmm... i'm not worrying anymore about the requirements of the CFA (college of fine arts) in diliman because i think i'd be able to handle it... whew, what i'm worrying about is my current college's attitude towards transferees/shiftees!! they hardly let anyone shift out! wtf.

anyway, it's all up to you, dear Lord. :)

i miss going to the mall! hahahaha :D

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKA!!!! =)

coffee prince ♥

i knew it. i'm not yet over with gays. and i thought i'm gradually growing out of it now that i haven't written any gay story for so long or even laid eyes on a harrydraco slashfic. >__>... but upon seeing the trailer of Coffee Prince, i confirmed i still have this weird fancy for homosexual themes. ^-^; and believe me, it won't (in any way) affect my sexual preference.

i'm excited to watch it!!
wait, actually, i've seen a dvd of this long ago before GMA introduced it... so maybe i could just buy that. hahahahah yeeehey!

or maybe iregalo nyo na lang sakin! dvd ng coffee prince!!! pleeeaaaseeeeee??? ^-^

maligayang pasko! (pasensya na at konyo ang entry na ito)

@ kakabalik ko lang galing ospital.
i spent 4 days in an un-airconditioned ward! haha ang arte diba... anyway. i figured it's better without aircon (but i still prefer a private room kahit walang aircon basta private)since it's kinda cold naman. and besides, i have fever that time so i hardly sweat. >__>; wenk.

@ i already started feeling bad saturday pa lang, but i ignored it! i even exercised! yan tuloy, lumala. the next morning, masamang masama na ang pakiramdam ko but i still insisted on going to church. ayun, sa bread of life kami nagsimba (crossroads77) and it was freakin cold there. ayun, dahil nga nilalagnat na pala ako, nagchchill ako sa kinauupuan ko. para akong sinasapian. shortly before the mass ended, i excused myself and went out. 11am nun eh, matindi ang sikat na araw! on a regular basis siguro isusumpa ko ang tindi ng init but because i needed to feel warm that time, pumunta ko sa sasakyan at dun nagpa-ihaw. grabe, ang sarap mainitan pag super nilalamig ka. take note, di pa ko pinagpapawisan. >___>; ganun ka lamig ang nararamdaman ko.

@ edi umuwi kami... ayown! 39 ang temp ko! whaaapak!! haynaku, todo panic si inay. ako naman, mega talukbong... "Lord! Lord! what have i done to deserve such misfortune!"

@ kinagabihan, sinugod ako sa fairview gen. hospital. dun muna kasi mura... di pa kasi bayad ung quarterly fee ng health card ko. edi sana nakapag-FEU kami.. libre pa. huhuhu. but then FGH is fine, mas mabilis nila ako maasikaso kasi onti lang tao. wenkwenk.

@ edi yun, mega chill ako. as in chill, nanginginig sa lamig, sa tindi ng impeksyon ng dugyot na sakit na ito (UTI).

@ ako man, di ko mawari kung san ko napulot ang aswang na komplikasyong ito. ineexpect ko nga tonsilitis kasi masakit lalamunan ko at usually yun lang ang sanhi ng lagnat ko... but no...nononoooo. ewan. di naman ako mahilig sa softdrinks, junkfoods, salty foods... weird talaga. gayunpaman, nagkulang talaga ako sa TUBIG. ok TUBIG, peace.

@ ayon. so mula sunday, which is december 23 hangang kanina.... nakaconfine ako! in short, sa OSPITAL NA AKO NAG PASKO!! nice diba? hahaha pero oks lang. huhuhuhu hahaha.

@ yun nga lang... di na ako pinayagan magparty sa bahay... e dapat ngayon yung barkada xmas party namin dito sa haus.... hehehe yun, pinagchange venue ko na lang sila. super grateful pa ako kasi super understanding nila... huhuhuhu I LOVE YOU BTS!!!! :)

@ hmmmmhmmmhmmmhmmm... shempre pag may sakit ka wala kang gana kumain diba? grabe mejo naenjoy ko to. weird kasi kumakain si terai sa harap ko ng masarap ng spaghetti at hindi man lang ako natatakam o naiinggit! ang galing! sana laging ganon! hahaha ayoko na mag diet.

@ I QUIT BEING AN APPLE FRIEND (pag dinner)

@ haaay. sobrang nauseated ako all throughout! tapos tinurukan pa ako ng gamot na anti suka ata yun... so sukang suka na ko, sasabog na ulo ko sa sakit... buelo ako ng buelo sa inodoro, walang lumalabas. napamura talaga ako!

@ sana sumuka na lang ako ng sumuka tapos bigyan ng lang ako ng hydrite... mas ok yun. mas gagaan loob ko. imbis na buong araw masakit ulo ko tapos di naman ako makasuka.

@ dahil sa pagpupumilit ko sumuka. nasugatan ang lalamunan ko. the agony, pare. di na nga ako makalulon, bawat lulon ko pa mahapdi. huhuhuhuhu

@ hehehehe. okok. ok na ko. haba na ng storya ko.

@ after more than 10 years ngayon lang ulit ako naconfine! hahhahaha

@ nanaginip ako ng maganda kagabi! pero nagising akong umiiyak, pero maganda parin sya... ginising kasi ako nung nurse e... tapos nung natulog ako.... CONTINUATION pare! ang galing! mas kilig na yung kasunod... ayoko ikwento. i won't mention names... even though the odds of them reading this is high. bwahahaha

@ ok. alang alang kay inay at sa kanyang insecurities na unti unting pinapatay ng kurso ko ang aking kalusugan, lilipat na akong diliman.

@ shempre... conditional parin.

@ciao.

such a short break

before we left for the break our hum1 teacher assured us that we would have something academic to do over the vacation. so he left us with 137 pages of boring text from various writers (including some pages from anne frank's diary - that's 68.50 pesos swept off from my pocket).

last night i gave time to sort the pages off and found out that he gave us exactly 12 different stories to read... i couldn't help but laugh at this. he wanted to make sure we won't present any viable excuse not to read the whole text because we can do it day by day. 12 days of vacation for 12 different readings, ranging from the most boring englishman to the most liberal filipino writer. =|

on top of that, i've just downloaded 4 neil gaiman books from 4share.com and i still have tons of meg cabot pending to be read.

seriously, the need for a laptop is becoming unbearable. i couldn't invest a fortune on mimeograph printed bestsellers... that's why i stick to e-books (however illegal and selfish it sounds), then again i don't have enough time for this. grrr...

hehe. i'm looking forward to a laptop.
but for a short term goal i think i'd have to open another bank account, this time with an atm card... because my other bank account is strictly for my investment money only.

yeah. i think it's better, i'd have two accounts... one for my future and the other for my miscellaneous needs (like a decent DVD of gravitation and clothes, yeah, clothes). hahaha... hello money. where the hell are you?!?!

wenkwenk. i forgot, i also need to get thinner and fitter this vacation... no matter how ironic it sounds to do on a diet this christmas. i'm a sucker for a lean frame.

gine pomelo gin pomelo gin pomelo

WEDNESDAY NIGHT was great! :) i attended two parties. bwahahaha

@ earlier that day, i attended my hum1 class (which is the only class i attended that day because i don't want to occupy myself in the afternoon) because we have a group presentation. then i went out to buy decoration stuff, crep paper, ribbons blah blah blah... wenk. i was in charge of the decorations kasi. and then... blah blah blah... my dormmates carried the TV from the kitchen to the living room! yehey! although it was damn heavy, the magic mic did good enough compensation. hahaha so parang 5pm pa lang... KANTAHAN NAAAAA!!!! yeheeeeey!

@ wow! ang sarap ng food! and tita beth did all of it! as in.. we have cater quality dishes on the table! we have caldereta, porkchop (na suppppeeer sarap ng marinade sauce, kaya hilaw pa lang inuulam ko na ung sauce. yak) and chicken (CHICKEEEN! as in kawta and friends! huhuhu, babay kawta... hahaha). then we bought cake from mernels! THE BIGGEST CAKE IN DISPLAY, MAN! tapos may buko salad pa... shempre care of tita beth, tita beth and of course tita beth!!! hahahaha

@ sadly though, i wasn't able to stay with them all throughout the night kasi i decided to make habol (wenk. conyo.) sa party ng org sa pansol. buti na lang pumayag si kat na sumama or else, di rin ako tutuloy. at buti na lang din, kuya wini was with us kasi hindi ko alam kung san kami bababa... hahaha in short, di ko alam kung nasan yung resort. bwahehehe

@ hehehehe. okok. masaya din to! hehehe walang tulugan! at least hindi ako natulog.. hahaha. so bale ang ginawa lang namin dito ay uminom (nag-session kami ni kat sa isang sulok... hahaha), magsugal, at uminom ulit. >___>;; first time ko makatikim ng gin pomelo... kasi nung nagbabaraha kami ang matalo, isang shot! so natalo ako, nagshot, at nasarapan. dahil dyan, binaliktad ang rules, ang matalo, walang shot. hahahaha so naging seryoso ang labanan. bwahahaha. shortly afterwards, naubusan na ng pomelo juice kaya pineapple na lang. haha masarap parin naman pero dabest parin pomelo eh. bwahaha

@ hindi naman ako nalasing... honestly, di pa ako nalalasing. hahaha high tolerance. adik... pero si kat? ewan ko kung anong tumama don, naging konyo! hahaha bahala sya.

@ hehehe basta masaya, naglaro laro din ako dun. nag volleyball with datu kaya super sakit ng katawan ko ngayon. wenkwenk.

@ nakauwi ako sa dorm ng 5am... nagising ako ng 4pm!!!! kaya todo madali makauwi kasi for sure traffic nanaman... :)

@ hehehe. home sweet home!

@ ok, balik diet!

scouting for inspiration

@ i'm googling for free blogger beta templates that might inspire me in creating a new design for this blog. actually, i've seen one neat-looking design, but it's in wordpress so i still have to do a lot of modification to it before i get it to work in beta.

@ i'm starting to like yellowcard! hehehe

@ i have no more exams for this week! which means i can sleep all i want! hahaha

@ i'm excited to change this layout already. actually, i want a very simple layout. with white as the dominant color. i'll pretty much be still using the framework of this thing... i'm just gonna make a new header image... and it requires photoshop. :/ wenk. :{

insights, confusion, wishlist

@ i have another exam tomorrow. haven't started studying yet. time check: 9:45PM. napaka unproductive.

@ wala nanaman akong $$$$$$. i just bought gifts for my dormmates awhile ago. naaadik nanaman ako sa dvd. grabe. >___>

@ CONFUSED nanaman ako. what's hindering me from making up my mind about shifting? clearly, the taunting procedures posted at the ceat building should be of no importance if i am really determined to shift out of this blasted course.

@ I WANT TO TAKE FINE ARTS, major in ADVERTISING. visual communication interest me a lot. what's happening now is tinitiis ko lang yung course ko. sorry, i wasn't born with the right genes fit for an engineer. i personally honed my mind to work better in the abstract world. technicalities annoy me. i am more inclined with the relative and the subjective. the truth that i search for is unknown and i'm enjoying pondering on that field.

@ I HAVE TO MAKE UP MY MIND. evertime i think of shifting out, i feel saaaaad. parang ayokong iwan ang UPLB. napamahal na kasi ako dito. i don't want to leave my friends, my DORMATES, THE ORG (believe if or not, it's the only reason why i'm proud to say i'm taking up chemical engineering)... huhuhu super mamimiss ko lahat ng yan.

@ it was a mistake to tie so much bonds with this place, it only makes my departure harder to accept. >__>;

@ i'm not sure if i'll ever make it big in the real world. there's so much competition involved. so much crap and trash-talking. parang it's not practical to stay 'good' when the world dictates that it takes an ounce of immorality to succeed. one can never reach the peak of his carreer without a single person harmed. it is impossible to cater to your fellowmen's need with a selfish motive.

@ i missed writing. i seriously think i need to attend workshops to enrich whatever is left of my writing skills. i'm thinking of joining another org, UPLB Pantas. i just want to get access to workshops... that's all.

@ i want to have a laptop na! super naiinip na ako! for sure, i'm going to have more writing time when i get one. :)

@ nafa-fascinate ako sa es-991 calculator ng casio.

@ i can't feel Christmas!!! grabe.

for my wishlist

# DVD ng Coffee Prince (korean series) with english subtitles
# DVD ng Gravitation (anime series)
# a Hello Kitty Pillow
# Red low rise Chuck's.
# a pack of starr candy (previously stork, yung green..)
# chocolates (safari, anything imported... ferrero! ♥)
# lots of shirts! statement shirts... :)
# pants
# slippers
# something from The TShirt Factory or Spoof (ung starbucks and tag heuer spoof)
# a cute analogue watch. yung hindi metal... :)
# a feng shui bracelet.
# gift check from starbucks
# metallic pens (my metal: pink, blue, silver, purple)
# MONEY!

ang wierd talaga!!!!

@una sa lahat. hindi ko ma-explain ang nararamdaman ko, langya talaga. LORD! help!

@i saw more than 10 shooting stars last friday! amazing diba?!?!? may meteor rain daw kasi! so my dormmates and i went out to watch, we were planning to watch it at freedom park kaso sarado na raymundo gate, ayoko mag-effort pumunta dun... haha delikado na. ayun, masaya grabe! kahit na super sakit sa leeg hahaha at ang epal ng mga poste at kable ng kuryente... panira ng view!! hahahahahahahahaaa

@07-B FINALS! congrats Grephein! (sorry, di ako sure sa spelling!) yehey! no more bitterness for me. :) it's fun to have a lot of members. hahaha

@wenk. may exam ako bukas at sa tuesday. maya na lang ako mag-aaral. napaka tamad talaga.

@wenkwenk. 1000 hits nanaman. sana gawing 10,000 ng histats ung database bandwidth nila! haha, uhm, i'm not expecting anyone to relate with this. hehehe

@hmmm... BARKADA XMAS PARTY!!!! sa 26 na! bahay namin! excited nako!!! which reminds me, WALA NANAMAN AKONG PERAAAAA!!! at wala pa akong gift para sa mga tao... huhuhuhuhuhu...

@hopeless romantic: mga wish ko sa mga shooting star... "may exam ako next week!!" (err, di pala to wish no.. statement lang) "gwapong manliligaw!" haha ang choosy!!! sabi nga nila, ang mga katulad kong naghahanap ng may-itsura, mga bingot at nakikita. >___>;; LORD! help!

@ehem. bakit minsan, sa kalagitnaan ng pagsasagot ng mga friendster survey, tinatamad ako at hindi ko na tinutuloy kasi feeling ko... weh, corny na. wag na nga. hahaha.

@err, may bago akong crush. eto super di ko pinagsasabi. kahit na kay kat! (na nakakaalam ng halos lahat ng crush ko)... sorry. hahahaha

@nag simbang madaling araw kami kanina! hehehe, malaking sakripisyo ito! i mean, first of all, hindi ako katoliko pero i don't mind attending misa de gallo. in fact, nag-communion ako kanina. wala lang, namiss ko lang yung ostia (??). first time ko rin mag puto bung-bong! tapos nakipag almusalan din kami sa likod ng chapel (kape at pandesal)! ayos! diba? ang fun pa nung pari!! hehehe

hahaha, hiatus muna ako sa mga all-english entries ha???? :) :)

will i ever get the chance to...?

@ one of the things i enjoy most is daydreaming about my crushes. okok, sorry i'm actually making a very shallow teenybopper entry about my usual grayscale of a lovelife.

thing is, everytime i meet with kat (which is basically everyday), all she ever talks about is her boyfriend... her palangga, her tart, her love. not that it annoys me, it's actually fun just listening to her and their (sometimes) misadventures into (omg, i hate writing like this) the labyrinth of love. harharhar, now i wrote it. sometimes it makes me jealous. i'm turning 18 and i haven't got a decent love-life. maybe i'm that ugly. or perhaps the people here are just so consumed with their academic lives to even bother looking for a special someone. i don't know, i'm not sure.

so ask me, what have i eaten lately that i suddenly feel like i've been lacking enough experiences on love?

actually, last night ate jayjay's orgmates went for a carol in our dorm. before they sang christmas songs, we made a request first. we made them sing 'harana' by parokya ni edgar. i just sat there on the couch, kinikilig. ang sarap palang maharana. ♥ ♥ ♥ i never thought having someone serenade you would be so heartwarming. i love the feeling. and everytime i try reliving it, i feel nice! hehehe

honestly, i'm not sure if i want to have a boyfriend now. i'm very picky. >_> i don't want to settle for something less...? and yabang hahahaha. seriously, i don't just consider every nice guy to be fit for me! we (women) have this annoying tendency to be so overly picky with the guys, like they'll just kneel down before us and present themselves, if they're not good enough then sorry, reject.

no, i'm not saying i've rejected someone already. heck, i don't even have a choice! as in none! 0! nada nada null null. no one has presented himself before me, ever. saaaaad. nyak.

@ one of the hardest thing to do is to go on a DIET.
i think if i transfer to foreha, or to new dorm, then i'll never have to worry about getting a regular exercise. but come on, where am i? i'm so close to temptation. i walk out of the dorm and all i see is food! i don't have to walk a mile to go to my classes, because there's always a jeepney waiting outside. i can't go lazy about going outside because it wouldn't even cost me a kilocalorie.

compared to life in new dorm or in forestry, if you want to get food you have to make a mental struggle because it's too far! so in the end you'll just go sore with what's present in the canteen. >___>;;

dancel dancel, i think i'd go thinner if i live in the fourth floor of dancel dormitory. hahahaha good idea.

ok, so effective tomorrow. NO RICE. just biscuit or bread but NOOOO RICE.

>___>;;

nah, just sleep it over (bitter mode)

hello!
hehehe, i'm quite happy today because our es10a teacher dismissed us 2 hours early, yeah!!!

@ okok, honestly speaking, i'm not yet comfortable with the idea of adding a new batch to our org. maybe because THEY'RE A LOT. err, that's actually a good thing, i'm being selfish...sorry. err, maybe because i'm still enjoying being part of the newest batch. jealous? hah, that sucks.

isa pa, ok? I CAN'T FEEL THEM. seriously. hindi ako natural na kupal, though people say i do look mataray... it's hard for me to act bitchy around these applicants but at the same time i'm enjoying it because i don't want to see them enjoying the reporting process. in short, i'm this type of fucking villain who hates seeing the protagonist stretch her cheek muscles even for the faintest smile. bitter! grabe, hahahaha that's why i want them to experience the exact (or even more) hardships our batch went through.

@ the consti night was extremely easy. for 2 hours they just sat there listening to the consti reading (may natutulog pa nga, ptngna). then when it was time to group them for the slightly harder part, there weren't enough time for us to make them suffer because it's nearly 10 and the police is already warning us.
gulay talaga o! our batch, for the most part, endured the whole of the consti night squatting and doing pumpings.

IT WAS THE HARDEST NIGHT FOR US. we were drained physically and mentally. i broke down on the way home, i was fucking too exhausted. what the fuck, WE ALL CRIED.

well, that's the bitter part of being in such a small group... fuckdammit we're just 3! they're 26! how much easier can it get?!?!?

@ i think it will have to take time for me to completely accept their batch. well, i do accept a few of them, some who made sense to me (even those who didn't report). i guess i have to make an effort to know who they really are, individually. eh ano ba yan, ayaw magreport! takot sa kupal. haynaku.

@ life is a matter of perspective, i've realized. hahaha.

@ crush talk. note: i'm still 17! i have to right to rant about who makes my stupid heart flutter. hahahaha

ang wierd kasi eh. minsan kinikilig na lang ako ng walang dahilan. tapos pag kinilig ako iisipin ko pa kung sino sa mga crush ko ang dahilan. grabe. anong klase yun?! basta pag kasama ko sila masaya naman... i mean, hindi naman sabay sabay na kasama grabe super polygamous ko naman. hahahaha, wala lang natutuwa lang ako na makita sila. lalo pa kung nakikipagtawanan ako sa kanila diba... mababaw kasi ako eh. or simply, basta gusto mo yung tao tatawa ka sa lahat ng hirit nya kahit corny naman.

ganun naman diba? i mean, haller, kung galit sa isang tao you wouldn't even laugh at his funniest joke. pero di nga, masaya magka-crush. it makes me closer to reality. lol. so parang, on Ryan Agoncillo hiatus muna ako ngayon (kahit na nadagdagan na naman ng isang pic nya ang wallet ko hahaha) kasi ang dugyot na ng itsura nya sa ysabella, what's with the lino broca (sp?) look? isa pa nung nasa deal or no deal sya kabuhok na nya yung adik sa buhok sa charlie's angels. parang, FREAK! bakit nagkaganyan kaaaaa! sinisira lang ata ni juday ang image mo.

bago naging sila ni juday, ang tingin ko kay ryan mga supermodel ang type. but fuckdammit when the news broke out about the two of them, parang, huh? i can't believe ganyan ang mga tipo mo, ryan! i mean, si juday kasi pang-masa, si ryan mejo elitista. and now, it seems like juday dragged him to the brink of ka-chipipayan. sorry, and harsh ng mga sinulat ko.

diba nga bitter pa ako?!??!?!!!!

i'm not sure what to say (weh)

@ ADVANCED HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEACHY!!!!
her debut celebration was held yesterday at the acropolis greens clubhouse. when i entered the subdivision, i immediately made a vow that one day, i will own a lot in this place. i was overwhelmed! the houses are big and the location is perfect (it's in libis). what more can i ask for? i mean, yeah it's quite ambitious of me to dream of becoming part of the acropolis neighborhood because it's like an exclusive village for ultra rich people but whatever, it's just a dream. a long term one that's probably gonna cost me a hell lot of fortune. i wonder if there are still vacant lots in there, i really want to build my own house. for that matter, i want a family to live with too. :0

i missed peachy! wow, she's a lady now! and sexy na sha! no more triangle hair and baby fats! grabe i almost cried during the entourage, it' been freakin 6 years!!!! and i missed tita shiela too! huhuhu, still a very pretty mom. :)

@ I MISSED MY PHONE!!!
finally, ate theresa bought me a new charger! yehey. i think she searched the whole greenhills for it but ended up in commonwealth market. sheesh. thank you! i know it's a big pain in the ass to look for such a rare charger! i was even thinking of just buying a new one, a nokia with a universal charger, and just sell my previous unit in ebay. hahaha. and because my phone's kinda old - a 4 yr old motorolla e398- the ultra thin silicon skin is somewhat wearing off already. that's why i decided to just peel off the entire skin and voila! it's good as new now! it simply revealed the inner thing which is just the plastic case which is super black and shiny. now i just need to buy a new crystal case for it. hehehe

@ DID I MENTION EBAY?
i got a semi-positive feedback from ebay just recently. this client agreed to purchase my dad's compaq ipaq 3950 for 8k. i'm just waiting for him to set the date of appointment then we'll meet and finish the business transaction. i can't wait. i do hope he's gonna push though.

@ WHAT ABOUT MY CRUSHES?
ah ok. i have three major crushes right now. they're all my brods. hahaha. my dormmates know. i always tell them my crushes. well you see, it's like this... whenever i tell people about my crushes, chances are it's just a plain crush, nothing serious. most of the time i keep my serious crushes (those whom i'm likely to fall in love with - though i can't tell if i've ever been there. still can't figure out the thin line between love and infatuation) - to myself... and sometimes to my sister. hahaha because i need a lot of time to think it over. what the fuck diba?!?!

@ OK. LAST
we went to dapitan awhile ago, not the historical one with Rizal... i'm talking about the dapitan arcade... i don't know where exactly that is. somewhere in quezon city... my mom went there to buy christmas decorations and stuff. gaaah, i was bored. every stall pretty much sells the same things. they're all native products. my favorite item would be the marble eggs. wala lang, cute sila, mabigat. mejo wierd gawing gift but i'm also considering it. pero parang hindi ni rin kasi i'm not sure if we're coming back. ok, wag na lang. may naisip na akong ibang gift sa mga kaibigan ko. hahaha. labo

@ SUPER LAST NA. HAHA BLOG KO NAMAN TO DIBA?!
i apologized to robin yesterday through text. masyado ko pala siyang kinupal nung nagrereport siya. bati na kami!!!! actually his batchmate, jesse, was the who made me realize i'm becoming a bitch now. ok, hindi na kupal ang term. i think i've become bitchy (and bitter) during the reporting period. marami daw naiinis sakin. wow, na-sad ako dun. super. haha, kupal ba ako? hahaha dahil dun, hindi ko na pinahirapan si jesse. nagusap lang kami. walang kahirap hirap ang pagrereport nya sakin. hahaha. inamin ko na i'm just doing it (pangungupal) for fun... dahil nga bitter ako! at sinabi rin naman ni kuya jhomar na pahirapan ko sila. lol. i think their batch hates me (BIG TIME) now.

sorry.

stolen!

i stole this from a friend's multiply. hehe fun!
what to do: go to google and type in "[your name] likes to", "[your name] loves", "[your name] hates" ... including the quotations marks, okaaay? then it's just a matter of listing them down... like this

Likes:
1. Arianne likes to play music on her instruments, dance and sew.
2. Arianne likes to joke.
3. Arianne likes to play darts.
4. Arianne likes to relate to vaginas!?!? (lol. that's exactly how it's written in google!)
5. Arianne likes to dress like a slut so she wore a lingerie basque and stockings for this video shoot. (o_O)

Loves:
1. Arianne loves to taunt.
2. Arianne loves being a baby-wearer and natural remedy extraordinaire. (a what?)
3. Arianne loves the song Drift Away.
4. Arianne loves the Air Pogo.
5. Arianne loves to say "ibang level!". (haha)
6. Arianne loves domineering men, and having such a hot brunette dominate him was also a pleasure for him. (exactly. the last word is HIM. lol)

Hates:
1. Arianne hates that stuff but it gets her to calm down when she's in a lot of pain.
2. Arianne, hates me.
3. Arianne hates: Losers.
4. Arianne hates chaos and pandemonium.

kay, kay, just that. :)

too young and stupid

i suck in putting titles to my entries. >__>
anyway, today is december 5.... tomorrow is my best friend's birthday (peachy!!!!). awhile ago we had a general assembly, it was fun, as usual... i don't get tired of just hearing them joke around. lol, not that we're wasting time with foolish things... we're just having fun. hahaha, laughter has to be maintained for a lifetime.

it was also awhile ago that i had someone report to me. i swear, i was in a fury. i simply hated his guts, his towering self-confidence (and to think he told me he still lacks it!). kupalan ito!! keyword: hated. i think my, err, hatred towards him is fading away. i hope he changes. it's for the better anyway.

ever since my VERY first cheering practice, every step i make is a struggle, especialy with steps and stairs. fuck. and by far, i cannot remember a single step since that night. hahahaha.

so hopefully, tomorrow would be a great day. i'm looking forward to an extended swimming time and a postponed history2 class. hahahaha


hahaha, crush talk nanaman.

they're both my brods. :)

anyhow, we have an applicant who looks like Lewis from Meet the Robinsons. at first i actually think he looks like harry potter (well, you'll always get that from me. get your hair down and wear glasses and you'll look like harry potter for me) but then i think he resembles Lewis more... in a less cartoony way.

note: he's not my crush.
keynote from above: they're both my brods (my 2 crushes). he isn't my brod yet, but we'll see about that.

it seems like i never really run out of crushes. :) hahaha they're much better than having a boyfriend... i guess. hahahaha i don't know. i'm too young and stupid.

bakit nga ba ako nandito?

ang storya sa likod ng aking pagiging estudyante ng department of chemical engineering. na lubos kong isinusumpa.

sa application form:

first choice: UP diliman
course1: journalism
course2: business mgt

second choice: UP Los Banos
course1: communication arts
course2: economics

haaaaa?
bumagsak ako. technically, yes. dahil pinadalhan ako ng rejection letter ng UP kung saan nakasulat at aking UPG. 2.25 ata and passing sa diliman, 2.50 naman sa Los Banos. 2.6 ang nakuha ko.

minarapat ng mga magulang ko na magpawaitlist na lamang sa los banos ngunit kailangang magpalit ng preferred course dahil kung ipipilit ko ang commarts at econ, 2.6 ang grade na ililista nila. mababa, kahiya-hiya at malamang lamang walang papansin sa akin.

ngunit nakita ni mommy na pag kumuha ako ng engineering na course, tataas ang UPG na icoconsider nila, ang 2.6 ko ay magiging 1.5!

ganito kasi yan...
ang UPCAT ay nahahati sa apat na parte: Math, Science, English at Language. may kanya kanyang scores ka na nakuha sa bawat subject at yun ang tinitingnan kung pasok ka ba sa course mo.

FOR EXAMPLE:
assuming na over 100 lahat ng subjects

at eto ang percentile rank mo (actually, akin to):
Math: 90
Science: 91
English: 78
Language: 42

note: ganito ang ibig sabihin ng percentile rank, for example sa math - 90 ang nakasulat, ibig sabihin nasa top 10% ka (100-90) ng mga kumuha ng exam, sa math lang yan. ngayon sa science (see scores above), nasa top 9% ka naman, sa english at language nasa top 22% at 58% ka naman. or more appropriately dahil mababa ang language mo, nasa bottom 42% ka.

hindi ibig sabihin nun ay 90/100 ang nakuha mo sa math!
gets?

dahil dyan, tuloy tayo...

bawat kurso ay may required percentile rankings na kailangang masatisfy ng estudyante bago sya lehitimong makapagaral ng kursong iyon.

for example, para makapasok na ng commarts eto ang minimum standing na dapat nakuha mo sa UPCAT

math: --
science: --
language: 75
reading: 80

example lang yan ha! you see, blanko ang math and science, ibig sabihin... wala silang pakialam kung bobo ka sa math and science ang mahalaga magaling ka sa language at reading. ganun talaga ang mga kurso, hindi lahat icoconsider.
kung dyan ako nagpumilit na pumasok, bagsak agad ako... ang 80 na kailangan sa reading ay hindi ko naabot (dahil 42 lang ang nakuha ko)... haaay. T___T;

ngayon tingnan natin ang chemical engineering:

math: 85
science: 85
language: --
reading: --

kitang kita rin na wala silang pakialam kung bobo ka sa english ang mahalaga ok ka sa math and science. see the logic? mas ok kung dito ako papasok dahil na meet ko ang minimum requirement ng kursong ito. mas mapapadali ang pagpasok ko. mas mapapataas ang ranking ko.

given those, nagpawaitlist nga ako sa chem.eng'g

dumaan ako sa usual process of admission... nagpasa ng kung ano anong mga papeles, nagpa-notaryo at ininterview ng dean.

result: hindi nakaabot.
top 10 lang ang nakapasok.
#12 ako.

masaklap.mapait.napakasakit.
ang pangarap kong makaabot ng kolehiyo ay unti-unting nagalaho.

but wait there's more, rather... there's still 2nd sem. swerte na rin ako dahil tumatanggap sila ng applicants for 2nd sem, unlike diliman. hehehe

so ganun ulit, nagpawaitlist at ininterview ni dean for the 2nd time. nanlalata na ako. pagod na ko e.

june noong lumabas ang resulta ng admitted waitlist applicants for the first sem. october naman ang oras ng pagpasa ng request for waitlist for 2nd sem.

so anong ginawa ko ng mga panahong iyon?
ayon, nasa bahay... naglalaba. hay, bum ako noon.

tapos yun nga... to make the long story short, sa awa ni God, natanggap na ko. #2 ata ako nun. at 6 lang kami na nakapasok. feeling ko rin nga 6 din lang kaming nagapply for 2nd sem eh. naawa na lang siguro sila... or baka naman pinili na lang nila kami alphabetically kasi surprisingly, A,A,B,C,D,E ang surnames namin.

diba ang pathetic? pinilit ko lang talaga makapasok sa UP. feeling ko pa, i'm not worth it.

na shock pa ako. ang taas taas ng tingin nila sa mga chem.eng. pag nababanggit na chem.eng ka, laging 'whoa' ang reply nila.

mind you, hindi ako natutuwa. nalulungkot pa ko sa sarili ko dahil wala akong kilalang chem.eng. na hindi magaling. ako lang ang katangi tanging chem.eng. na panakol ang grades. huhuhuhuhuhu

haaaynaku. it's not even an excuse na commarts talaga ang gusto ko. either course, feeling ko magpapabaya rin ako.

whatever. hahaha ang haba naman nito

whiskywhisk

i've been whisking a cup of egg white with a fork for quite a while now. >__> i'm trying to get to that creamy goodness... manually. T___T; huhuhu, my arms hurt. i'm making an experimental coffee mousse by the way. bwahahahaha, and because we don't have high-tech baking tools (like an electric whisking machine)... hafta stick with a fork, and a generous amount of man power. whew! anyway, i think i'm near that creamy goodness because my once slimy transparent eggwhite is now a thick white foam.

whooooooosh! whiskywhiskywhiskywhisk!

i almost cried?

lol. i almost cried with my own fic. bwahahahaha

read it here
but before that here, i'll give a short forewarn:

- crappy grammar: sorry naman ha? i'm not good in english, my beta-reader hasn't mailed me the proofread version yet (it's been years! i think she forgot it already). you're free to criticize, curse me for bastardizing the english language and neglecting the sacred law of grammar.

yun lang. :)

WANTED: BETA READER!!!

whew. i love traggic endings! suuuuupppper! as in gusto ko yung mga storyang makapagpapa-igting ng aking emosyon. gustong gusto ko ng mga nakakaiyak na konklusyon. ayos yun. gusto ko ng may namamatay na bida. T____T; bwahahahahaha

it should be a happy birthday for my friend!

if antonio trillanes weren't good-looking enough, i wouldn've cursed him to the pits of hell but hahahaha i like him! not because i agree that he should seize a hotel just to deliver his grievances to the government but because he's good-looking (for me). bwahahaha

still, i hate what he just did yesterday. did you know how much time it took us to travel from UP Los Banos to Home? 6 FREAKIN HOURS, MAN. my sister and i boarded the bus at 5, and 2 hours later, we're still in Laguna. fuck the traffic. we've finished our mega sized tortillos and have dreamt a lot already and we're still in laguuunnnaaaaaa. miles away from the expressway. and when we got there, our patience was tested still. traffic nanaman! plus! it took us another hour to reach the PNP Checkpoint and when we got there, we were like "WHAAAT?!??!? NASA CHECKPOINT PALANG TAYO???????" it clearly is a bad idea to travel that night.

we arrived at megamall at around 930 and when we went out the bus we were like, "Praise God! Steaming Chicken Teriyaki and Miso Soup + unli Rice, HERE WE COME!!!!"

but lo and behold! we've begged the guards enough to let us in but noooooooooo! they won't allow anyone to enter the mall anymore! and what is to be blamed???

THE 12MN CURFEW!!!!
then of course, it all boils to down to Trillanes ♥

so we have no choice but to go home without eating. i'm starving, my head hurts, and my sister is throwing tantrums already because she's hungry too. she's one hell of a monster when her stomach isn't full. >____>

eventully, our parents fetched us off at fairview caltex, we bought food on the way and thank God, we're home! finally!

---------

♥ HAPPY BIRTHDAY NEZ!!!!!!! ♥

high priority

kailangan MAGPAPAYAT!

hephep!

what i have to say about our chem40 lab instructor:

hell, he has a lot of expectations!!! well, what great performance could you possible get from a class mainly consisting of first takers (excluding me, of course!). i got that from experience, now don't argue. being a 2nd taker clearly has its benefits.

what else? i think, i'll be learning more from him than i did with my previous instructor. i like the way he makes sure everything is explained, as well as how he provokes our minds to do simple mechanical logic on the way the instruments to be used are designed. take note too: he makes SUPER LONG prelab discussions it takes a lot of our hands-on experiment time. plus! he doesn't dismiss us immediately, he wants to make sure he has told us every piece of information we should harness ourselves with.... include unsolicited advice here. but that's ok, he's fun. i can tell. :)

however, he can get too harsh on us. by that, i mean he isn't gentle when pointing out that what we're doing is wrong and downright unforgivable. when we were shaking the freakin separatory funnel with the dicloromethane and liquid organic extract, he was like "hindi ganyan!!"

like crazy, man. he startled us big time.

anyhow, through his emails i can see that he is quite a gamer. his username speaks of an RPG character and his notes are funny, in a semi-unforgivable way. and he puts opening and ending remarks like

to my adorable students,

(insert degrading-slash-funny-and-enlightening remarks here)

yeah!

- sensei alvin

hahahahaha
i'm looking forward to learn more from him. more so, i don't want him to learn i'm a second taker, because swear, i don't want him expecting a lot from me or from anyone else for that matter.

and ultimately,
i want to pass chem40 this time.

not productive

i haven't studied yet. i have two quizzes tomorrow both of them having very long handouts. ha, that's the least of my problem... >___>;;

i already went online awhile because our history teacher didn't show up, during that time i already made a very long post about my utterly biased opinion on the issue of traditional vs. digital art (i'm for trad) but decided to just leave is at a draft for the meantime. i mean, i've been babbling about the same concern ever since! and until now i can't seem to get enough points to back myself with the argument that being an artist lost it's exclusivity and sacredness ever since the emergence of tons of digital art programs/softwares became mainstream and photoshop became the producer of virtual canvasses. >____>;

ok, let's leave that.

i was thinking of switching to LJ. i'm very concerned about my err 'private life'... also, i don't want a lot of people (especially those i know) reading my blog entries. not that there's much, i actually perefer strangers than friends when it comes to developing good readership. point is, i hardly want anyone to sympathize with me. sometimes i always end up overly conscious with what i've written, specially that this blog is always linked to my other pages... >___>;; waaaah.

LJ or Blogger???? wooot.

more so...
i don't feel like performing in jami's debut anymore. simply because i don't want to look epal. besides, i still haven't prepared for it. she said the motif is red. well, i don't have a red dress! i haven't even bought her a gift!!! mehn, i have a lot of buy this weekend.

haaay, ok. i'll study now. :|

entry number 8-hundredsomething

i dunno. i'm slacking off again. maybe there's really not much to do, but i like it this way. i only have 3 subjects a day and all of them have at least 1 hour intervals, what can i say? i love my schedule though i have to sacrifice my being a sophomore for it.

i'm being negligent of my duties in the org. i've never attended a single meeting of the publications committee. i'll have the weather to blame for that, plus my retarded phone who receives important messages 3 hours late.

i'm trying to save a lot of money for this semester, i'd like to invest on books. though i've said this before... i never really had the chance to religiously update my collection of books because those that i like are either new releases or too expensive that sooner or later i just forget about them.

hum1 is really exciting me. whenever our teacher explains the things to expect on his subject (ie. lots of readings, poetry, short stories, WRITING, critical evaluation...) i become excited! clearly because these are the things that interest me a lot...

i'm also looking forward to Hum2 (art) because duh, that's ART!!! my favorite craft!!

which reminds me, i'm sort of regretting the path i'm trekking right now. it isn't paved to say the least. it's muddy and downright annoying. what i'm trying to say is that, I MISSED THE FACT THE UPD FINE ARTS HAS ADVERTISING AS ITS MAJOR!!

then again, i think i still stand a chance! teka teka, naexcite ulit ako! i don't think it would be that hard to transfer to Fine Arts!

hehehe, we'll see about that!

hard gay!

i just came home from our dance practice at ding's place. harhar, can't even consider it 'our dance practice' since (huhuhuhu) i wasn't really part of the whole routine. i just, hmmm, made a very little appearance because i don't have enough time to learn the whole dance!
ay, i also brought them ice cream! yey! now i can say i've celebrated my birthday with all the important
we watched a couple of youtube vids on their pc and damn were my muscle cheeks pushed to the limit. they were so funny! try using search tags "ping pong matrix" and "human tetris". you'll be amazed by the videos. i can't believe japanese people are very creative commedienes! wahahahahahaha

more so, we also watched "hard gay!" hooooooooo! hahaha, ok you can just search that as well. very funny guy. bwahahahahahahaha

haaaay, i'm waiting for some videos to finish converting so that i can transfer it on my player...

so while waiting...

do you know the feeling of being around a guy who likes you in a way you don't? he gives you special attention and you hate him for that. he does good things to you, things he doesn't normally do to other girls, and it feels really awkward. for a moment you want him to stop and just leave you alone but out of being polite, you just treat him normally just like with you other friends.

mehn, i hate people like that. i'm very good at dropping hints, but he's poor at catching them.
can't you get a clue?

i'm a ropeless romantic but i also want to make sure i get that 'romance' i deserve with a guy a like. actually, i prefer being with someone i love than with someone who loves me. but of course, i'd always choose to be with someone i like and vice versa. in short, i hate one-way relationships. >___> and again, i hate guys who can't get a clue.

between sweet and legal

i'm now 17!! hehehe, can't wait to turn 18! my 17th bday celebration was great! :) hehehe i brought cake and spaghetti for my dormates and went out to treat my friends dinner. :) we ate in sizzlers, blahblahblah, they surprised me with another cake! awwww, thanks for the gift! i had fun! bwahahahaha... after that... kat, july and i were supposed to go to square together to have a little drink. then charles came! wow! it's been a long time... harharhar, instead of drinking we just played... lineage2!!! hahahaha kumusta naman level 5 palang ako? walangya. tapos nun ayun... uwi na!

wag ka, 11pm na nasa kalsada parin kami. hahahaha, ok lang. masaya naman e.
salamat sa lahat ng naki celebrate sa akin!! :D :D
salamat din sa mga bumati sakin through text! harharhar

actually, natuwa talaga ako na may nag-drop by pa sa dorm para lang bumati (at kausapin ako kung bakit lagapak ang grades ko. wenkwenk). harharharhar, salamat salamat. :) nakakahiya naman sa inyo. harharhar, sige sige... magbabagong buhay na ako!!

it's coming sooooooon

grabe, pasukan na naman!
ehehehehe, sa wednesday pa kami kaya bukas ng hapon pa ang uwi namin ni terai papuntang elbi.
haynaku, namiss ko ang mga dormmates ko. >___>
at ang mga kaibigan ko, lalo na sina kat at july.

malapit na rin ang birthday ko! i'm turning 17!

sabi ko kay terai, regaluhan nya ako ng malaking hello kitty stuff toy. kaso ayoko nung galing sanrio/gift gate. ubod ng mahal! nabili na rin pala yung guso kong stuff toy sa gift factory kaya huhuhuhu, no hello kitty for me.

kaya sabi ko sa kanya bilhan na lang nya ako ng pampaputi! ung 'magic cream' bwahahahaha at saka isang libro. :) hahaha, pumayag naman sya.

para sakin early birthday present sa itong bagong mp3 player mula kay mommy (kasi credit card nya ginamit)... but technically, ako parin ang magbabayad! hahahaha

siguro this weekend bibili na ako ng swimsuit, wala na akong gagamitin sa PE eh... harharhar

kaya naman kung gusto nyo ako regaluhan, pwede cash na lang?
hahaha, i'll post my bank acct. number soon! weh... hahahahaha

nakakalungkot naman, i'll be celebrating my birthday with my dormates, my college friends, my family... pero barkada wala!! harharharhar... sorry mga pare, sa debut ko! kayo bida! hahahahaha

finally! i got my own creative zen!

mom purchased it for me through her credit card, then i'll pay it by installment. hehehehe :)
yeeey! that's one item off my wishlist!

what can i say, it's so beautiful! sleek and handy, Creative is like building a new tagline which says, "in your face, ipod!"
now, i'm ready to create a review on my previous creative item, the Zen Nano Plus, after utilizing it for more than a year. eheheheheeee

i'm so happy! yeahyeahyeah!
okokokok

more so, i've just finished playing Reavenhearst Manor!!! heheheh and also, i'm on level 9 in Zuma! the last level at last! :D

pandesal, please!

i want pandesal!!!! :(

ok, so what do you think is the reason why i'm still awake at this point of time (4:10am)???? simply because... i can't sleep.
like usual, man.

here's how fucked up my body clock is at present: i can't sleep! i spend 5 hours on the bed wide awake and struggling to fall into slumber. believe me, i tried closing my eyes and pushing away all thoughts that might cross my mind in hopes of feeling sleepy but i still end up awake. fuck. then at around 5-6am, that's the time when i feel sleepy... and hell, i wake up at 12 noon (or when someone wakes me up) then sleep again (directly after lunch!) and wake up at around 7pm!

man, so if lunch isn't served and there's no one to wake me up, i might just end up sleeping for 14hours straight! tell me it's crazy. i totally hate that sleeping pattern.

and of course, school is to be blamed for these super unhealthy routine. i didn't realize i've been doing this for roughly 6 months already! and that's mainly the reason why i don't attend my morning classes and doze off at my 1pm lecture last sem. when i get back home after classes i immediately drop myself to bed and sleep. and only the opening song of Marimar can wake me up... hehehe

wouldn't want to miss sergio kasi. >__>

and right now, i was planning to continue playing Mystery Case Files: Ravenhearst Manor but decided to just do a quick (and kinda long) blog entry then go back to sleep (and hopefully get a decent one). i'm so close to finishing the game! i've gathered all 20 diary entries and have found the 7 keys that would unlock the last door but unfortunately, i realized i couldn't get through without a cheat (because it's damn confusing)... that's why i went online.

hehehe, ok. i'll go upstrais now. bye :)

time magazine hailed the iphone as 'invention of the year'?

wooooot! the haryxdraco fangirl in me is resurfacing yet again (uhm, is that redundant?)! hehe, thanks youtube! even though it's a big pain in the ass to wait for the videos to download completely, you make my day worthwhile! hehehe

good news! finally, i've found a reliable flv converter!
check out Freez FLV Converter. i swear it's really good, well... at least for now. :) hehehe it only converts flv to two outputs, .avi and .mpeg (mpeg1 or 2, whichever, i don't really know the difference) and that's good enough already. unlike other converters i've tried, this one doesn't take a lot of time to convert plus you can adjust the quality settings.

there you go. ;)
have you heard of Super Media Converter? that's the first one i've tried. it's a pretty good freeware, except that it crashes down when the version you're using is outdated already and has been replaced with a newer one. anyhow, what i like about it is that, by far, it's the MOST COMPLETE media converter i've seen which is an opensource... and you can convert anything to everything (provided that it's of media file format, duh). the thing i don't like about it though, is its sort of user-hostile interface. for beginners, i don't recommend it because the system is very hard to learn. once you run the product, you'd be faced with a window that practically shows everthing. i mean, all the functions are jammed up in one window already, so by all means you should know what you are clicking before you punch in the convert button. and they don't have 'default' settings so you have to adjust everything by yourself. harharhar, i don't have patience to learn all that.

then again, for people who are already gurus in the business and want to try it, go ahead, search for super. the company is already generous enough to offer a product like that at no cost so try it before they begin asking for fees. >___>

also from Freez, i got another software that converts flv to mp3. this isn't really mainstream but i found it useful when the mp3 that i like is only available in music video form, and i don't like the video. try it, it's quite useful so you don't have to download the mp3 version of the music used in a vid. :) :)

wait wait, there's more.
i just received my regular cnet update and found out that Time magazine hailed the iphone as 'invention of the year'

here's my two cents on it:

i fucking don't agreeeeeeee!!!! first, it's not even an 'invention'. i don't know how else to explain it but really, it's not an invention. lol. and it doesn't deserve the award. maybe i'd rather call it 'most innovative gadget of the year', yeah suits better. harharhar.

hehe

roight. sometimes my head ticks off with the most depressing thoughts. i feel unworthy and useless, much worse i feel like i'm better off 6 feet under. it's so hard to fight depression once you start dwelling on it. it will really consume you. i don't like the feeling of being depressed, it feels like there's nothing i could ever do to fix everything and escape is the only word that makes sense.

but, i've found a solution already. actually, i only realized it know. the best way to fight depression is to surround yourself with people. i only feel depressed when i'm alone because my mind is free to think of anything. but when i'm with people, my family, my friends, my dormmates... no negative thoughts come to mind. not that the people around me are extremely jubilant beings, but just the mere thought of having people around you is enough reason to at least prolong your life. see?

being depressed has something to do with the feeling that all you ever did was wrong. the truth is, you're over reacting. not everything that goes wayward is entirely your fault. there's always someone to share the blame with, it's just that humans don't usually admit their wrongs that easily. it always ends up with someone pointing you out. just remember one thing, if ever you did something wrong... ALWAYS ALWAYS admit it first before someone else does. and if you're not aware that you did and someone already accused you of the crime... hehehe... point someone else to share the blame with! i know it's bad to point people out (yeah, really bad) but you should know it's not entirely your fault! share the blame, lessen the burden of depression! i dunno, this might sound like a useless advice (i think it is..after all). even i don't have enough guts to just acuse someone just so i won't suffer alone. oh, a sadist's way.

okokok, maybe i'm talking nonsense now. i'll stop.

zzzziiiiiipppp.

let's move on to another topic

i feel kinda guilty that i'm not able to attend any of jami's dance rehearsals for her debut. it's just that on the noted dates i always find myself busy and unavailable. sorry. >____> am i still invited? ohgosh.

hey, i'm already registered! i just finished today. hehe

:)

wishlist

i need a million bucks for this .
pardon my covetousness and my seemingly ambitious and maluho dreams. harharh

1. BOOKS
by Dan Brown, Meg Cabot, Paulo Coehlo or Neil Gaiman :)
on recent count, i need to acquire 3,000 just to get all the books i want
2. an 8gig Creative Zen
a smashing 10,000 for this one
3. Speedo Swimsuit
a two-piece tank and trunks preferrably. and wtf, the trunk costs 1,100 and the tank... i forgot i think it ranges from 1,000-1,500. so all in all 2,600 must be shelled out. a one piece is like 1,800 but i'm too conscious with my legs that i'd rather wear something akin to a boyleg to at least lessen the insecurity. hahaha, as if it's big enough.
4. LAPTOP
well, i'm not in a hurry to get this one. the lowest i could get is worth 30,000 and that's an Acer with overqualified specs (80G HD, Celeron M, XP/Vista, 512RAM w/free upgrade to 1gig, 17" monitor w/ built in webcam...), but the thing is... it's only 1.66 MHZ (or was that GHZ?) ... pretty slow.... i think?
anyhow, any Acer or a Compaq greater than or equal to 30,000 will do.
5. BAGS
i want big shoulder bags. :)
6. RUBBER SHOES
7. Chuck's
a pair of red low-rise sneakers is perfect. :) i'm size 7 btw...
8. CLOTHES
just like any girl in this planet, i want a wardrobe update. i keep on wearing the same thing over and over every week. not only they're starting to stink (b/c i sweat a lot and it's damn hot here plus since they won't let me wash in the dorm all my clothes go to the washing machine in the laundry shop. i'd rather hand-wash, yknow) but i'm also growing out of them. I'M GETTING BIGGER, LOL. i'm afraid i'd be running out of sizes in the department store soon. >___>

and that's why i also need a
9. WORKOUT CD
yeah! let's burn those fats!!!
10. GYM SUBSCRIPTION
i want to get into Fitness First but i think gym equipments are boring >__> and i fear that i'm just going to end up pampering (and bloating) myself with their sauna room and unlimited iced tea. but i still want to try :)
11. MEGA FAST INTERNET CONNECTION
to soothe my downloading dillemas. with our recent connection, i have to wait for at least 30 minutes for a single song to download! >__>;; and i want to download videos too. hehehehe

oh, that's a lot of money to save! i can't contain my covetousness though. harharhar, but sometimes i just grow out of those 'needs' and end up taking the more practical option (which is simply not buying anything) ... then again, maybe i'm just dreaming... it's already 2am anyway and i ought to be sleeping soon.

99 secrets girls have to know about guys (weh)

(with side comments)

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls. (same here)
2. Guys hate flirts.
3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is. (same here)
5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have you eaten already?" are the first usual questions a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering. (not always)
6. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. (sweet ^_^)
7. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics. (he should be)
8. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. (i do to)
9. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention. (hehe, really...)
10. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend. (you won't get that from me. lol)
11. When guys want to meet your parents. Let them. (on my signal)
12. Guys want to tell you many things but they can't. And they sure have one habit to gain courage and spirit to tell you many things and it is drinking! (not guaranteed though)
13. Guys cry!!! (i know. they're human)
14. Don't provoke the guy to heat up. Believe me. He will.
15. Guys can never dream and hope too much. (quite right)
16. Guys usually try hard to get the girl who has dumped them, and this makes it harder for them to accept their defeat. (i don't like the idea of still pursuing the girl who dumped them. makes their brains narrower)
17. When you touch a guy's heart, there's no turning back.
18. Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...never mind!" would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking.
19. Guys go crazy when girls touch their hands. (weh?)
20. Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like. (weeeh?)
21. When a guy makes a prolonged "umm" or makes any excuses when you're asking him to do you a favor, he's actually saying that he doesn't like you and he can't lay down the card for you. (true)
22. When a girl says "no", a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow." (not always)
23. You have to tell a guy what you really want before he gets the message clearly.
24. Guys hate gays! -not all of them, just some annoying ones (gays are fun to be with - for girls of course)
25. Guys love their moms. (they really should)
26. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses (weee, i want one!)
27. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her. (that's vain. i don't do that)
28 You can never understand him unless you listen to him. (duh...?)
29. If a guy tells you he loves you once in a lifetime. He does. (yes, i know)
30. Beware. Guys can make gossips scatter through half of the face of the earth faster than girls can. (hahahahahah)
31. Like Eve, girls are guys’ weaknesses.
32. Guys are very open about themselves.
33. It 's good to test a guy first before you believe him. But don't let him wait that long.
34. No guy is bad when he is courting (yeah, i think so too)
35. Guys hate it when their clothes get dirty. Even a small dot.
36. Guys really admire girls that they like even if they're not that much pretty. (yeahyeahyeah)
37. Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend. (tsk. i hate this kind of situation)
38. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.
39. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you. (weh)
40. A guy finds ways to keep you off from linking with someone else.
41. Guys love girls with brains more than girls in miniskirts. (yeah)
42. Guys try to find the stuffed toy a girl wants but would unluckily get the wrong one. (hehe)
43. Guys virtually brag about anything. (me too)
44. Guys cannot keep secrets that girls tell them. (haaaaa?)
45. Guys think too much. (that's why they get suicidal)
46. Guys' fantasies are unlimited.
47. Girls' height doesn't really matter to a guy but her weight does! (hehehe)
48. Guys tend to get serious with their relationship and become too possessive. So watch out girls!!!
49. When a girl makes the boy suffer during courtship, it would be hard for him to let go of that girl.
50. It's not easy for a guy to let go of his girlfriend after they broke up especially when they've been together for 3 years or more. (it's not easy for us to break up either)
51. You have to tell a guy what you really want before getting involved with that guy. (already said)
52. A guy has to experience rejection, because if he's too-good-never-been-busted, never been in love and hurt, he won't be matured and grow up. (ugghh, exactly)
53. When an un likable circumstance comes, guys blame themselves a lot more than girls do. They could even hurt themselves physically. (yeah, pride)
54. Guys have strong passion to change but have weak will power. (huhuhu, ako rin)
55. Guys are tigers in their peer groups but become tamed pussycats with their girlfriends. (diba ganun naman talaga?)
56. When a guy pretends to be calm, check if he's sweating. You'll probably see that he is nervous.
57. When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl. He really is.
58. When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me". (eeee, not always)
59. Guys don't really have final decisions. (ows?)
60. When a guy loves you, bring out the best in him.
61. If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him.
62. If a guy has been kept shut or silent, say something.
63. Guys believe that there's no such thing as love at first sight, but court the girls anyway and then realize at the end that he is wrong. (well, it still could not be love at first sight)
64. Guys like femininity not feebleness.
65. Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.
66. A guy may instantly know if the girl likes him but can never be sure unless the girl tells him. (duh. feelingero)
67. A guy would waste his time over video games and basketball, the way a girl would do over her romance novels and make-ups. (i love romance novels! but i'm not yet on the make-up-crazy stage... someday though)
68. Guys love girls who can cook or bake.
69. Guys like girls who are like their moms. No kidding! (yeah, i've noticed)
70. A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes. (i think so too)
71. A guy's friend knows everything about him. Use this to your advantage.
72. Don't be a snob. Guys may easily give up on the first sign of rejection. (hehe, onga naman)
73. Don't be biased. Try loving a guy without prejudice and you'll be surprised. (it's hard to like someone whose first impression didn't actually 'impress' you)
74. Girls who bathe in their eau de perfumes do more repelling than attracting guys. (yeah, i hate strong perfumes too)
75. Guys are more talkative than girls are especially when the topic is about girls. (vice versa)
76. Guys don't comprehend the statement "Get lost" too well. (uhh, me too...>_>)
77. Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions but still love them more.
78. When a guy gives a crooked or pretentious grin at your jokes, he finds them offending and he just tried to be polite.
79. Guys don't care about how shiny their shoes are unlike girls.
80. Guys tend to generalize about girls but once they get to know them, they'll realize they're wrong.
81. Any guy can handle his problems all by his own. He's just too stubborn to deal with it.
82. Guys find it so objectionable when a girl swears. (hehe, same here)
83. Guys' weakest point is at the knee. (how come?)
84. When a problem arises, a guy usually keeps himself cool but is already thinking of a way out.
85. When a guy is conscious of his looks, it shows he is not good at fixing things.
86. When a guy looks at you, either he's amazed of you or he's criticizing you.
87. When you catch him cheating on you and he asks for a second chance, give it to him. But when you catch him again and he asks for another chance, ignore him.
88. If a guy lets you go, he really loves you.
89. If you have a boyfriend, and your boy best friend always glances at you and it obviously shows that he is jealous whenever you're with your boyfriend, all I can say is your boy best friend loves you more than your boyfriend does. (no, it's not enough basis to say your bestfriend loves you MORE than you boyfriend does)
90. Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience. (i think i get more 'virtual' experience from books, hehe)
91. You can tell if a guy is really hurt or in pain when he cries in front of you! (lol, i'd love to see that)
92. If a guy suddenly asks you for a date, ask him first why. (yeah)
93. When a guy says he can't sleep if he doesn't hear your voice even just for one night, hang up. He also tells that to another girl. He only flatters you and sometimes makes fun of you. (okok)
94. You can truly say that a guy has good intentions if you see him praying sometimes. (=])
95. Guys seek for advice not from a guy but from a girl.
96. Girls are allowed to touch boys' things. Not their hair!
97. If a guy says you're beautiful, that guy likes you.
98. Guys hate girls who overreact.
99. Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.

breaking the habit

it kicked me hard. yes it did. and now i am brought back to my senses. i realized a lot of things. sometimes it's not good to be happy all the time. make room for depression because only when you feel it that your mind dwells in reality. realize your mistakes and point them out even before someone else does, it makes it easier for your towering pride. be laid back, only when you have enough time to spare. drink, when you have someone to drink with. eat cake when you're willing to share it with someone else. subscribe to unlimitxt when you want to disturb your phonebook. drink coffee if and only if you need to stay awake for the night. go to astra only for research and the bastarded systemone. never ever do the same mistakes twice. never ever get a singko for the fourth time.

i only felt it now. depression. paranoia. hopelessness.
and i can only but leave the past behind, dwell not on my failures but on things i can do to fix my messed up academic life. it pains me, yes, like an iceberg 90% of me is mourning for my carelessness and regretting all my foolishness and the rest of the 10% is allotted for that ounce of happiness. like a freakin iceberg, i'm setting up a facade. people only see the 10%... the happiness, the fake joy and witness not the sorrow, the incalculable amount of self regret and remorse for my own, my very own mistakes.

i was too distracted to even notice that i'm not anymore walking firmly along the right path.

now, let's give a toast to my *ehem* very untimely resolutions list. :)

1. i will not procastinate
2. i will lessen my ventures into the world wide web and wander only when necessary
3. i will sleep ON TIME. by that i mean, i shall do my best not to stay any later than 10pm.
4. with regards to that, i will also lessen my coffee intake (and you know how much it pains me to do this)
5. i will ATTEND my classess diligently even though the attendance is not part of the grading system
6. i will not sleep inside the class
7. i will do my homeworks immediately
8. i will drink my vitamins and milk everyday
9. i will eat healthy foods and will watch out for my diet
and of course, without the last premise i cannot do all of those
10. i will/shall/must PRAY everyday. no matter what happens!

that's what i've been lacking these days. my personal connection to God has weakened ever since i became too exhausted with my previous schedule. but now, i'll definitely give due time for a prayer. i need to improve my well being. a lot, man. :)

Lord, help me now.

heto na...heto na...

i received an email regarding my preliminary schedule for 2nd sem.
haaaay, 11 units lang ako dahil nacancel ang math37 ko... duh. shempre dahil singko ako sa 36. at dahil dyan...

prerog ang kasagutan! :((
nyak.

Lord, help me.
hindi pa naman ako dismissed diba???? :(
14 is just 1 unit close to 15. and 15 out of 20 units failed = dismissed. >___>

Lord, help meeeeeee.

marimar marimar marimar... ♥

the whole family is addicted to it! what can i say, joyce bernal yan eh! everything is perfect! imagine a reknowed movie director do wonders on a TV series! i could just see each episode with film like quality... omaygad. >____> i'm fantasizing with my own Sergio. @_@

much more, i'm once again caught in gerald santos' music. he sings like he's serenading you with his sweet ballads. his songs are heartwarming (not to mention heart-melting too) and sincere. i haven't heard someone sing better than he does. man, i'm getting frustrated with downloading a decent mp3 of his song 'mahal kita'...from marimar of course. i want to have his version of 'huwag ka lang mawawala' as well.... grrrr... >_>

to all the staff of marimar, please release a Marimar OST SOOOOOOON. it's killing me. better yet, please produce another album for Gerald Santos. ♥ ♥

when i get married (err, someday), i wish to get Gerald Santos as our wedding singer. ^______^

ngek. kinikilig parin ako! >____>;
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

g'morning

i wish this blog had been filled with more sensible posts. then again, you'd hardly get that from me. bwahahahaha. i miss my friends. berimats. whew. i'm getting fatter and fatter by the minute! i should've joined my parents and sister at crossroads 77 today for the dawn watch, a small ministry at the top of the building. they always go there to pray then afterwards head to qc memorial circle to exercise. there in the park is a bounded area where people congregate to dance their way to fitness! you pay twenty and get a ticket then go in and do taebo!!! there's an instructor there on the stage and people just go follow him and his fat burning steps. man, i need to workout!!!! >_>

omaygad, Sergio is my new crush! Marimar just seems to get hotter and hotter by each episode! man, i would love to have my own Sergio. his hands are big! he can just hug you tight and you'd feel safe for the rest of your life! haaay ♥ owkamownaw.

games galore! yeheeeey

i'm making the most of my sembreak by drowning myself in games! thanks to my roommate, i have acquired two brand new cool games to play here in the computer, straight from her desktop...which is in our room hehehe.

the one is Zuma, exactly like tumblebugs, only with a different theme and no bugs. i'm on level 8, utterly frustrated to go through the third of the 7 parts without exhausting my life line. >_> one more level to go before i finally get that, uhhh, Zuma's incentive. whatever. >_>

the other one is an installment of Mystery Case Files: Ravenhearst Manor. this one's pretty cool too, it's not kiddy... it's a seek-and-find game with puzzles. yehey, i'm enjoying the gaaameeess.

hehehe. have i told you i fancy new notebooks? i love checking them out in bookstores... feeling the paper, evaluating if my penmanship would be good on that brand. hahahaha, freak freak. >_> i'm over with cattleya, i figured no matter how hard i try, my penmanship would suck there and i will left unmotivated to take down notes on it. maybe it's psychological, or maarte lang ako sa notebook. wahehehehe. but all my notebooks last sem (except my math notebook) is cattleya and the sem ended with my notes not on my notebooks, but on scatch papers... that got lost, thrown and crumpled. i don't really recall. >_> and my math notebook? it's my proudest notebook so far, because my notes are really clean there. it's avanti i guess. seeee? hahaha. this is pointless.

i just want to tell you i'm excited to start the second sem and christen my new notebook (a big refillable one!) with my first subject... uhh, hopefully math37. :)

come on zen!

i came across a back-up cd just now and i'm delighted to see some of the files i deemed lost forever were luckily saved! after losing my amelie soundtrack, i got depressed over the thought of downloading the whole 20 tracks again... that would take me forver, given a very FAST 46.6 kb/sec internet connection... >_> but then i saw a folder named 'amelie' and saw all the 20 tracks there! saved! yehey! then there are some application installers too! and a couple of games! i thought i had lost them already! thank goodness... yehey!

i have a lot of mp3s on that folder. man, ity only triggered my desire to purchase the Creative Zen. only ebay has it. ebay philippines, man. and i could only wonder how the seller got it when it has never been released here. connections, duh. probably from someone in the states or somewhere else. it really shouldn't rock me big time. >_>

man, i have to buy that 11K worth of mechanical treasure. and i can't do so without sweeping clean my entire savings for the semester. >_> i wanna buy it now dammit! T__T;

apparently, my mom confirmed i have allergies... like my sister. i've been sneezing ever since the start of the first sem and i don't seem to run out of colds for that matter. my health has gone terribly bad.

and it all started when i took the summer class. >_> remember i had to endure 2 months inside a hellish NEWLY-PAINTED dormitory? yeah, man i must have inhaled all the paint and aquired a lot of boysen deposits in my lungs. >_>

i don't like being unhealthy. >_>

i am craving for pandesal!!!!
daddy, go home now! >_>

owkamownaw

i thank God for today. even though most of you would consider this really terrible, i still thank God... because i finally have the sembreak for myself! :D

heeeryagow:

♠ math36 - 5
i took the removals exam awhile ago and it was freakin hard! and i thought the removals are always always easier than the finals. i should've studied during the finals na lang sana diba? so with no further delay, i now declare my grade to be 5. thankyouverymuch.
♠ chem32 - 5
my lab instructor said so... even without the classcards out. it pretty obvious anyway
♠ chem40 - 5
as posted outside her unwelcoming faculty room


but then again, i am not awfully depressed. all of those were expected. i made a mental note to myself not to expect anything higher than a 4. and indeed.

according to the student's handbook, if a student fails 75% of her workload on a semester, he/she shall be DISMISSED FROM THE UNIVERSITY.
and if my calculator serves me right, because i don't believe in my mathematical skills anymore, i am 1 UNIT close to being dismissed (in short. goodbye UP! or face the grim process of readmission- conditional pa yun.waaah!).

out of the 20 units i took this semester, i only passed 6 units (with earth-rocketing colors pa yun ha. in short-mababa.)!

math36 is 5 units
chem32 is another 5
chem40 thankgoodness is only 4units even though it has a freakin laboratory subject.

14 units!
triple warning for the OSA!
i'm on probation nooooowww!!!!

and there's no hope of me transferring because even if i get a GWA of 1.00000 next sem, my overall GWA would still lie between 2.5 - 3.0 and that's not going to put up a good competition among the mob of tranferees on my preferred course in diliman.

i'm stuck. dammit. stuck in this,errr, bars that i've unconsciously jailed myself in.
i'm stuck! yeahboi.

and everytime i think of it, i feel like shit. especially that i have an org, and the people there are (may i borrow this term) uberly academic conscious that i think of myself unworthy to be part of the pack. now i'm being regretful. now i don't EVER want to see any of them again. fuck. i shouldnt've have joined this sem. it would be a shame. as i've always mentioned before, i don't like the way they brag about their towering academic acomplishments... if you were in my shoes, you'd feel the ground softening into a quicksand, swallowing you alive. yeah, and they won't notice, because you don't have a plackard saying you got a 1.0 on chem40. fuckitall.

then again, i'm glad....weh. :)
i'm happy actually. i want a medium sized m&m stormblaze from snowstorm. and that big acryl refillable notebook from national bookstore.

which reminds me, i still have to go back home.
back.home.

*dear mommy and daddy, sorry for wasting your money. >_> can i just file for LOA and work? i think i'm better off as an OSY, selling dried mangoes on the bus, handing down a piece paper on the passengers which says, "HI, I'M ARIANNE, AN OUT OF SCHOOL YOUTH. I AM HERE TO SELL YOU SPECIALLY MADE DRIED MANGOES. FRESH FROM THE TREE..blahblahblah"

or maybe i'll just go sell makeups, bras and undies from AVON. >_> i'm sure i'll be earning more than you wasted paying for my blasted tuition fee.

*wahahaha JOKE!

part of why i slacked-off is that my parents don't mind if get a 5. they actually stop me from studying when i look like i've burned what's left of my eyebrows!
wahehhehehehhe.... thank yoouuu mommy and daddy!!! i love youuuu!!!! :D :D

okokokokokok.
i'll go home na!!
ice cream! ice cream!
yeaaah!!!

ayos!

so back on the 24th, we we're having fun in Enchanted Kingdom...

and NOW, i'm back in elbi... to face the grim reality of being an in-progress academic probee... kat texted me (just awhile ago) that i got a 4 in math36 and i have to take the removals exam tomorrow, 2-4pm.

the moment i read the text message (i was in qc by then), i groggily told my mom that i have to take on a trip back to elbi because as much as i'd love to study at home, i don't have what you call those 'study tools' or simply 'props' in my vocabulary... ngek. so i went back to elbi...

and now that i'm in elbi, mas inuna ko pa mag internet. hehehe... :)

OCTOBER 24, 2006...
early morning i was having doubts on pushing through with the outing because it's raining hard! good thing pat insisted or else i'll be regretting pulling the trip off... :) all in all 9 of us came!
me, terai, vynne, pat and her bf, kim, jayjay, steffi and ate ruth!
yehey! i had fun! even though it rained! it's a good experience!

yeah! next time ulit, k? :)

it's study time! yeaaah!! :D

the magic is here!

come on, Lord!

PLEASE DON'T LET IT RAIN!!!

i didn't get a haircut last night because i woke up 8pm and had to eat dinner, then i was caught by Marimar so i have to finish it first... then there's Hwang Jini, and mr. teenybopper (jan geun suk)... so in short...

i'll just get it later. >_>;

FINALLY!!!!!

i'm finished with the exams... UNLESS i get a kwatro! that means i have to get back here for the removals... :)

man, to take 2 final exams consecutively is absolutely consuming. >_> i haven't got much study on both of my subjects (math and chem) and lo and behold, the expected came. i wasn't able to answer well too... the chem32 finals has some confusing questions but majority of it was tolerable...

by tolerable, i mean it wasn't that hard... i just don't remember how to do it. because i didn't study, duh.
haaay. and the math exam, for the most part i just stared at it like a stoned fish, waiting for a streak of neuron that would hopefully give me a hint on how to do this and that. in short, just like the chem32 exam, i was stuck with the question, "FUCK! HOW DID WE DO THIS AGAIN LAST LAST MONTH????"

IT WAS A DISASTER. a catastrophic event that increased the possiblity of me getting a very low GWA this sem, let alone probation. T__T;

BUT I'M SO GLAD IT'S OVER!!!!
i'm excited to go to EK this wednesday with my dormates and other friends! i think we're only 9! hehe but that's ok! hopefully more people will confirm by tomorrow! yeheeeey! :) :)

AND NOW...

I'LL JUST GO GET A HAIRCUT! :D

crunch caramel

nothing like a cup of high kicking coffee and two bars of chocolate to wake me up from deep slumber! i have a new favorite chocolate and it is nestle's Crunch Caramel!!!

i'm having fun recording my voice! :) i'm using dad's (FOR SALE) POCKET PC recorder and it's damn great for podcasting or something of the like. you see, i was reading an essay about love with a piano instrumental in the background and i'm listening to it right now... :) my voice is... err... cool!! hahaha, i'm having fun!!! wahehehehe

so, how's my study progress? still 0% man. still a whooping 0%! oryt oryt, i'm gonna study now... >_>

EK with dormmates on wednesday!!! waw, i'm excited!!1

the magic is here!!!! :D :D

don't sleep, i know just what i'm facing

no sleep for me!
supposedly, i'm going to study for chem32 finals... but then again, the computer took me away. T__T; and now i'm stuck sneaking up on forums... reading this and that... fishing for the right answers for this one critical inquiry:

-----------
tanong lang...
what if:
1st sem: may dalawa akong singko
2nd sem: mataas GWA ko

at next year, balak kong magtransfer at mag-shift from UPLB to UPD pero yung 2 subjects ko na singko hindi naman kasama sa curriculum ng course na lilipatan ko sa UPD...

makakalipat pa ba ako?
mato-TOFI din ba ako?

dinig ko kasi GWA ng previous sem lang ang tinitingnan pag lilipat... yet again, i'm not sure.

isa pang tanong, pano kung singko ka sa isang "extra course", kailangan mo pa ba ulitin yun?
-----------

man, it's killing me. i am guaranteed a grade of 5 in two of my subjects, both chem... haha but i'm planning to transfer-shift next year to diliman... not sure of the course but something definitely deviant from chemical engineering... and it wouldn't have chemistry for sure... what will happen next? ok, i'm just restating my question.

now please help me... :)
pare ayoko ng ganitong buhay.

maygaaaah, isinusuka ko ang chemeng! and likewise, isinusuka rin nya ko. we meet only at that point! i hope it's enough.

owkamownaw

ok. so i'm getting on probation next sem. :D wuhooo! hehe, at least they're gonna cut off my load to a maximum of 18 units... which means i have to cancel a subject for that... hahahaha i'm going on GE overload next sem...

i promise to be better. weh. :) i'll try to fix my grades next sem, besides... it's just a ton of GE, math and microbio.... NO CHEMISTRY!!! fuck, i love next sem! and i have swimming for PE!!! what more can i ask for? hahaha... tapos biglang probee parin e... wahahahahaha

ayon. so hopefully makatransfer ako next year... :) plans.plans.plans. i'm itching to leave this blasted course. >_> and of course, TOFI kung TOFI!!

ayheytmaybradsamtayms

our last GA was ok. :) laughtrip... :) gayunpaman, di parin mai-aalis ang inis ko sa ibang tao...
is it me or mashado lang akong bobo? feeling ko kasi wala ng ibang basehan ang kagalingang kundi ang maka uno dito at doon. maygulay,

'o sino gusto maglaro for this sport?'
'si ano! si ano! uno sha dun!'
tawa lahat.
'si ano din! si ano din! 1.25 sha dun!'

o sige. pataasan na lang ng grade ha?

isa pa.
'kumusta naman ang mag-exam ng hindi nag-aaral?' aloud, pare. ALOUD. parang announcement sa buong org.

ouch.
putang ina.
maraming salamat ah.

i'll warn your roomate pag nakita ko sya.
mga bakla talaga o.

a look on my impending doom

oh, i skrewed it all up... AGAIN! but i'm not disappointed because i wasn't expecting for anything anyway.... the chem40 finals was fucking hard. >_>;

mam amada is so hard to deal with... she showed us a list of physics finalists (which includes me and practically the whole lecture hall) without even computing for our prefinal standing! what's that? hocus pocus?? and fuck, the cell for my 2nd lecture exam was blank! which made my standing lower than ever. she said 'maybe' i forgot to put my name on it. man, i don't remember anything. it's not like me to remember old exams... let alone if i wrote my name on the blasted answer sheet. man, how am i supposed to fix this mess??? hahaha, i don't care now. i just don't care*. i'll just answer the exam tomorrow with whatever it is i can manage to stuck in my brain tonight. oh yeah, which reminds me... i wasn't able to sleep last night!

i had 4 cups of coffee... ♥ you see, i was supposed to spend the whole midnight onwards to study for the chem40 finals on the same day... that's a good 7 hours of slow torture. lol the exam starts at 7 and it was just 12mn that i decided to study.

a quote once said that 'you wouldn't remember the exam that you failed but you would never forget the people you are with the night you decided not to study'

awww... well, it's always my dormmates who divert me from studying. and i don't blame them for it because i'm always happy when i'm with them! i love you crapmates! grouphuuuuug. wahehehehe...

i have plans for next week! no matter what happens to my retarded final exams, i'm getting a haircut! and i'm going for a hairspa too! then maybe i'll invite people to go to Enchanted Kingdom because they have a sembreak promo right now... man, i want to unwind! though i'm the one who needs it most since the 'unwind' thing are only for people are so stressed about this week. owkamown.... :)

whew. i want to sleep!!!! okok...
let's sleeep...zzzzzz

just when everyone else is studying

this guy makes my heart flutter everytime i see him ♥ ♥

jang geun suk from Hwang Jin Yi... ♥ ♥
too bad he's gonna die... OOOPS. sorry, that was a spoiler. ^____^
i cried big time when i watched a fanvid of him dying..... waaaaahhh.

man, he's so cute! :) and he's just 20! weh. hahahaha

casting crowns - voice of truth

i haven't studied still!! mehn, i slept a lot this afternoon.... :) hehehe. i'm not even sure if our chem40 exam is today or tomorrow... if it's today, then i'm not taking it because i haven't studied yet and really, i just don't care about it anymore.

anyhow. i'm alive today. yeah. :)
oryt oryt, i'm gonna study.... later. hahaha after marimar!

happy birthday little rio! :) :)

olivia lufkin - a little pain

it's Nana's ending theme! :)
he. it's sunday night already and i have't flipped a single page of my borrowed organic chemistry book. :( i'm being unproductive again! our 4th exam would be on tuesday and the FINALS - wednesday! yehey! i haven't studied yet! it's going to be a hard time for me! seriously... and then thursday we have physics... :( i guess i'm gonna do the usual studying less than a day before the exam starts. :\ i have the worst habits man.

aw mehn, i miss the piano. the pedal isn't working, it needs to be replaced... however i still don't have enough money for that. i'm still saving for the creative zen portable media player.... the 8 gigs cost approximately 11,000. lol i'm still a long way behind that... wahehehehe. and if mommy agrees to lend me 10 thou then maybe it's going to be easier for me. i'll do the credit card installment type. man, that's way easier. >_>

wahahaha. :}

i'm home!!!

yeeey! i've been waiting for this! after two weeks of not seeing my parents, i finally got the chance to go home! like crazy, man! i wasn't able to go home last weekend because i was heavily tuanted by the amount of exams i'll be taking that week. all in all, i endured (but not necessarily passed) a total of 9 exams in 9 days! oh, that's nothing! a lot of people in the university suffer a worse case than that. >_> but it's not enough to consider me lucky, heck! i barely studied in any of those freakin exams! i have a habit of studying say, 12 hours (or less) before the actual examination starts... and it's fucking consuming me whole. i haven't slept, i mean i haven't had a decent sleep since God knows when! anyhow... couldn't care less. i told you before, if it's about my grades... just skrew off. i'm not the least bit concerned... unless it's Hum2 because that's art and Hist2 because world history inspire me a lot to write!! oh GEs, they're my only hope! i suck in my prerequisite subjects! what more with the major ones!!!

oh arianne, you have to decide fast!

so... we just had our last chem32 lecture exam awhile ago... >_> you know what...

[WARNING: useless rant. stupid regrets.]

... the test was 'relatively' easy. by that i mean, the questions were answerable given an above average IQ, it wasn't like the previous exam where all i ever wanted to write on the bluebook was "fuck! which hell did these stupid problems sprout from? who's the demon responsible for this act of utter cruelty to humankind?!!???!"

mehn. the exam wasn't as hard as before but it's not that easy either. some questions were tolerable, some were unnerving and downright unworthy to be given even the slightest effort. blaaah. all i wanted to say is that, i could've answered better if i studied harder, or more specifically... EARLIER.

see? same old habit, same old regret! but i'm not really that regretful... i was more excited to go home than to bother with my grades. >_>

oh come on! and i met a new friend awhile ago in sm megamall. it's kinda strange that i don't mind if i talk to a stranger. >_> i mean, every relationship starts with you being stangers to each other. haller. >_> anywhow, i was waiting for the skechers street dance contest to start when this big guy just sparked off a conversation (he was also waiting for the show to start). oh, to warn you off first. this isn't a fucking love life. >_> the man i'm talking about is working, married, and has three daughters already.... :) so yeah, we had a little chat. he gave me a handful of advises... some of which i wouldn't want to take seriously especially the, "sige, ipagpatuloy mo na yang chem.eng, maganda yan."

no.no.no. i'm still thinking about it.
every teenager goes through this critical stage of confusion when they're 16. it would concern either of the following: identity (i'm pretty sure of myself naman), sexuality (i consider myself a bisexual when i was in highschool. but i grew it all off. i'm straight now. like crazy, man), blah blah blah and this special thing that concerns your future and you dreams.

yeah, that's what i'm confused about. i pretty much know myself, my likes, my talents and skills, my attitude but it still puzzles me as to why i am pursuing someting that is absolutely unlike me. >_>

dude, i don't know what will happen next. i haven't experienced that 'mega' eye-opener yet that will knock me to my senses and enlighten my mind about the reality that is ideal for me. :)

till then, i'll wait.
for now, i'll sleep.